The Team Manager Playbook: Christine O’Brien on Communication, Travel & Team Culture

SPEAKER_00 1:15

This episode is powered by NHL Sensorina. Hello, hockey friends and families around the world, and welcome back to another edition of Our Kids Play Hockey. I'm Leah Lyas joined by Christy Cashana Burns and Mike Vinelli. You know, every successful youth team has great players, they have great coaches, they have supportive parents. They're all there. But there's another person whose impact often goes unnoticed, and that is the team manager. So happy day managers. This episode is going to be all about you and celebrating you and explaining why the job you do is so crazy. You know, there's that first email you read, the person making sure everyone knows where to be, what jersey to wear, who brings snacks, where the team dinner is, somehow keeping the entire season from falling apart. Every coach knows what I'm talking about. And when they're doing their job well, this is the funny part. You hardly notice it. You don't even notice that they're doing that job. But when they're not there, everyone notices. Today's guest knows that role as well as anyone. She recently matched the Connecticut Junior Rangers at the BRIC tournament, something we've referenced many times here on the show. It's one of the most known youth hockey tournaments in North America. And she's passionate about helping team managers create organized, welcoming, and memorable experiences for every hockey family. Please help us in joining the manager of the hour, Christine O'Brien to Our Kids Play Hockey. Christine, welcome to Thank you for having me.

SPEAKER_02 2:41

Excited to be here.

SPEAKER_00 2:42

No, we're excited to have you as well. We're so excited.

SPEAKER_01 2:45

Yeah. I'll get this started because this started from an SOS I got from a hockey mom friend. She was voluntold she's going to be the team manager and she's panicking right now, Christine. What does that entail? What does that mean to be a team manager? What are my expectations? So hopefully you can walk her off the ledge. Let's discuss what's the first thing you should know if you've been voluntold to be a team manager.

SPEAKER_02 3:20

The first thing, I think it's an honor. I think it's great that the coaches trust you enough to pull you into the fold and to make sure that you're helping families along the ride. I loved being the manager for the BRIC team. We had so many incredible families. Everyone cheered each other on, and it was a pleasure to be a part of that and put everything together and make sure it was the best experience possible for our kids. The BRIC is a really unique experience. I also manage uh two of my four kids' teams for the upcoming season for the regular season. And what I'll say is that if you have been voluntoled or you volunteer to be a manager, one of the first things you need to do is understand the scheduling expectations and to make sure that you are allowing the coaches to focus on hockey and you focus on everything else and to make their lives easier. So it's all about being proactive, organized, calm under pressure. You know, things are and will go wrong, I assure you, but it's just about how you solve problems before they become bigger issues. So I think like the buckets I think about managerial skills are the scheduling, making sure that all the hotels are booked. And then also team bonding is such a big part of it, on and off the ice. I mean, you spend every weekend with these families, the better experience that you can provide for everyone, it's gonna be better for you and your kids too.

SPEAKER_04 4:45

Yeah, Christine, you mentioned uh I thought I thought, you know, when at the beginning there uh about the trust that you you know you get from the coaching staff. I mean, can you just talk a little bit about like how managers might not misuse the trust, but you know, sometimes there's like there's red flags of people that want to be the manager, right? Because there's there's there's something in it for them. And then the people that say, of course I'll manage, because I think the way I look at coaching all the time is like when I coach my own kids, my mantra to the parents is yes, I'm coaching my own child, but I want my child to have a great experience. And guess what? Because of my wish to have my child have a great experience, you all your kids are gonna have a great experience. Like you're gonna you're gonna ride the wave of me wanting to make sure my kids have a great experience. So can you talk a little bit about, you know, this isn't a professional manager, you actually have children on the team, you know, you're not like coming in and like you're not the director of operations for the you know, the an outside team that's not that your kids not on. You just talk about how important it is for that manager to not only gain the trust, but how do they gain that trust?

SPEAKER_02 5:51

Yeah, I think those are all good points. And what I would start is kind of focusing on like what I said about handling the problems before they come bigger issues and blown out of proportion. I mean, especially at the BRIC, you know, emotions were super high, right? This is the biggest stage these 10-year-olds have ever played on. Parents are very involved, want to make sure that their kids are being seen and getting the right playing time and that their statistics are correct. And all that, of course, matters. But I think what matters more is the experience. You know, everyone loves seeing, you know, elite prospects and their kids get points on the board. But truthfully, like I think the trust exists between manager and the two coaches we had at the BRIC when I was able to kind of make sure that nothing got blown out of proportion, right? And anything was settled in the background. Of course, like it is my job to bring the bigger issues to them they need to fix, whether it's behavioral perhaps at times, or whether it's you know, uh a misunderstanding that got blown out of proportion, maybe they need to handle directly. But if I can limit that to kind of one or two percent of what is brought to me, I think that I'm making their lives easier, I hope.

SPEAKER_00 7:03

You know, you you brought up Brick a couple times. We brought it up in the intro. Uh, let's talk about it for a minute because that that'll be like the juicy part of the episode that's not, you know, just the the things. But I I want to bring this up for a reason because I think it actually sets the stage. Uh, because this this is from a volunteer managerial role. You just said it. The highest, and I'm I'm saying this with quotations, highest stakes kind of tournament for youth hockey players. I'm also saying that a little sarcastically. The Brook tournament does matter, it is a very high-level tournament. I am not uh I'm not frowning on it, but uh the amount of pressure that comes with it when we're dealing with young kids um at times concerns me. Like I'm not gonna lie to you about that. As a manager, you just said you have to kind of manage that as well. And then you're dealing with other teams going through the exact same things and probably different managers and different coaches at different levels of uh insanity or intensity, right? And and I want to preface this again, Christine. I'm I am not like poo-pooing on brick, right? Like it is a very successful tournament with high talent. How do you even begin to approach that as a parent, much less a manager, to manage that level of pressure? Because again, anybody listening to this, I'm gonna just preface this one more time. If you think the pressure at your weekend tournament at the beach is a lot of pressure, like it's nothing compared to brick, right? How did you even approach that?

SPEAKER_02 8:23

Yeah, so I mean, it it is kind of crazy looking back on it that these 10-year-olds um had, you know, at sometimes there was thousands of people watching the game. They would just crowd around the ice rink on like both levels. I mean, it was broadcast on TV. So you knew people back home were playing were watching you play. There was TV interviews done at the end of it. Um, there was NHL former stars everywhere. I mean, the pressure is there. You walk through the hallways, and it's it's incredible to like see the names of these all-stars on the walls and people that became that came before you, and you're part of something bigger. It is incredible. The the first couple games, I think, are exciting, and then you you kind of get it the hang of it, which I will say. So the kids did such a good job, and Hammy and Jonesy were awesome in really supporting them, having been through this a ton of times, just understanding that you know, nerves will settle after a couple games. It was good for us to get um like an exhibition game ahead of time, but also like you're 10 years old and you're you're skating around the rink, and it's kind of crazy. Like part of being a manager was uh tapping other moms to help me with stuff. One of the things was the fat heads. I mean, these kids have these like gigantic, like two-foot pictures of themselves. You know, they're they're many celebrities for the week. It's kind of crazy. Um, but it was it was a great experience. And uh, I will say that I had like a really good group of moms I delegated stuff to. I had, you know, my my two shout-out moms were Kelly and Jennifer, like they did a lot of stuff for me. So that helped me focus on like the day-to-day, making sure the correct forms were filled out, that the stats were right, that the questionnaires were filled out in the back room. Any anyone that had um, you know, issues with their hotel, you had to deal with it. But then you had moms that were, you know, stocking our hospitality suite, making sure that the swag was correct. It it really was like a lot going into it. The swag was fun. Um, and I'm sure we'll all keep that forever. But it really is kind of like an out-of-this world tournament, and there's reservations every single day that needed to be made, you know, because there's 16 teams or whatnot jockeying for the same lunch and dinner reservations. And you want to be able to have those special moments for the team and play mini golf and go to lunch and dinner. And so there's a lot that went into it, but the the tournament itself, like you said, I think you know, the air quotes are real. Like I think it's an incredible stage, it's an incredible tournament. Um, and I was excited for my son that he was able to have the opportunity, but there will be more in the future, and it's not the be-all end-all of hockey. And I think reminding the kids of that is definitely helpful.

SPEAKER_01 10:56

And Christine, you raise a good point. It takes a team to run a team, even though your team manager, thankfully, you had other mobs, other dads you could lean on. And I think a lot of times parents forget that. Okay, you're the team manager, you take care of everything. It shouldn't be that way. I think, and you and I'm glad you gave those two moms a shout out. Because I, yeah, absolutely. And I think that's a good message for any parent listening. Just because you have a team manager doesn't mean that you should let them carry the load. Do what you can to help.

SPEAKER_02 11:34

Yeah, and I think it's all about finding the right people that are responsive, that you know have the best intentions for the team as a whole, sure. Um, and making sure that you know they're focused on kids first. It's you only want parents on your team that root for other kids on the team, right? Like you want everyone to root for each other's kids. And so having those kind of off around is the best, right?

SPEAKER_04 11:54

So so this tournament is obviously not normal, right? So for the rest of us here, so for the rest of the year. The rest of us does sound a little heady. I mean, yeah, and it's but it's but it's the cool thing about the good and the bad is is there's so much that goes into it, but it's over in the blink of an eye, right? But what happens when you're when you're now managing your winter team, or if you're a baseball manager or a basketball manager, whatever, it's a it's you know the the good thing is if it's going off the rails, it goes off the rails quick and it's over and you forget about it, right? But a hockey season goes so long. I mean, you're looking at a 25, 26 week experience.

SPEAKER_00 12:33

My my joke, Mike, is it's only 12 more months to go. There's no 12 more minutes to go, right?

SPEAKER_04 12:37

We're only moving through it. It does feel that way. When you hear the good or the bad, the team that wins the brick the next day, everybody's okay. Well, now we're in our season. So we're we're we're so it doesn't really, I think that's a great experience, and and and certainly what you took out of it. Um, can you just talk about like how are you gonna take that now and those experiences and and that discipline and then say and then expand it over 25 weeks?

SPEAKER_02 13:01

Yeah, and it's so team dependent. I'm managing uh one team for Mid Fairfield and one team for Connecticut Junior Rangers, and it's just different approaches, right? It's knowing the expectations of the coach and what they like to do. I have one coach, she's amazing. She loves putting together the schedules for the three teams that she oversees. Um it makes my job easier. So it's kind of just plugging the holes. And the other side is that I have the ability to be the one to schedule all the full ice games, right? And so that's all on me. So I actually don't mind that they're different because, you know, selfishly with four kids playing hockey, I can work it to my uh, you know, to my benefit every now and then. So making sure I can make as much as possible. But it really is, I think, knowing the expectations of the coach, knowing how long of a season it is, trying to give as much communication to other families up front and making sure that they understand the um the dedication kind of and the commitment. I think people new to the teams might um be a little overwhelmed at first. Like we travel a lot for mid-Fairfield and for good reason, you know, to make sure we're playing the right teams. And so, yeah, I think communication scheduling um is top of mind. I'm trying to get all of it done before September to make my life very easy on the day-to-day. Because, like I said, like stuff comes up, right? And so um making sure that the team chats, making sure that uh there's team parties and get to know you, and especially bringing in the new kids. We have five new kids to one of our teams um that are moving from all over the country. And so making sure that they feel welcome, I think is going to be a huge part of that. And I think team bonding off the ice is super important and it'll help build relationships back on the ice.

SPEAKER_01 14:45

When when uh team managers, brand new to the job, are trying to think of what kind of experiences would be beneficial to the team where everyone will kind of enjoy each other, not get on each other's nerves, the parents are having fun, the kids are having fun. What are some of the best experiences that you helped organize that you could, you know, give some examples to other team managers out there brand new to the position? What works?

SPEAKER_02 15:12

Uh, I think team meals in between games are super helpful. Just putting a place in the group chat, nothing fancy, but hey, we're all going here, anyone that can make it, kind of like low pressure steaks. I also think it's fun to do tournaments where you bring the whole family to. Like we did one tournament last year in Florida. Um, and I would, it's great when like my kids are friends with the other team smaller siblings, you know, like that creates really great lasting memories. You have to like the people on your team. You spend so much time. I see them more than my family, you know, like it's almost every weekend. Um, I also think Brick was really interesting because we had a few teammates that were not even from the US, they're from Canada. And so making sure that you're really being cautious of including them and making sure it works for their schedules, knowing that there's like an extra layer of um complications and also, you know, making sure you understand that like the exchange rate might not be one to one. So it might be a bit more expensive coming from the other side. I think, you know, making sure it works for everyone is so important. Not everyone comes from the same backgrounds, right? You get kind of a mix, which is the best part about hockey because everyone's equal on the ice. And I love the fact that we are able to get to know kids from all over the country and Canada through the other teams, but even on our own team, we have three kids, like I said, from Canada. So um, I really like team meals. There was a water park at one of our um, actually two of our tournaments. Wow, our kids are spoiled. Um they loved it. Like they just got to be kids, you know, not like little mini celebrities, but just let them be children. They're still nine and ten years old. And that was really cool to see them bond like that. Knee hockey at night is always great. Um, we're so grateful that whenever we have like a conference room, the kids can just hang out and let loose within reason. And the parents can hang out too, you know. And so um, I think it's the little things. I don't even think you need big things, like big monumental events, but I just think any opportunity that you could see that you're getting the whole team together instead of like little clusters breaking out, I think is really great.

SPEAKER_00 17:19

I think that's great advice. You know, I I love that you're bringing it up too, because um, you said right, you got to let the kids be kids, right? Uh, we've got plenty of examples in human history of kids that were not allowed to be kids when they were kids and what happens to them when they're older. And, you know, here's the funny thing the kid comes out at some point, right? You want the kid to come out when they're kids. I also think the fact that you're super aware of that is one of the keys here, right? I think people, including managers, coaches, parents, can get lost in the win-loss column. They can get lost in the pressures of the season. At the end of the day, our jobs in youth hockey is life lessons and letting, like you said, meeting the kids where they're at and letting them be kids. What I love about what you did there, especially with an international team, is bringing them together. That's a life lesson. All of your kids, listeners, are gonna be in an environment at some point where they're thrown in with people from other backgrounds and other cultures and hockey players and youth sports, I should say in general, get to do this early, right? We get to have these experiences with our kids early. So by the time they get to college or the time they get to the work world, they've got a lot of experience built up. I know that sometimes that seems crazy to people, but there, you know, there's a lot of children out there who just don't interact that much growing up, and then they get to college and they have a hard time, right? So I think that's such a huge life lesson that we we can easily lose sight of because there's a scoreboard, right? That their ability to interact with each other in a time, by the way, where there's screens available to every kid, and a lot of communication is taking place via texting or other methods like that. So I love that. Um, Christine, I did want to ask this too. Early in the episode, um, I said amen to something you said, and I'm gonna tell everybody why. You you made a great point about I want the coaches to focus on coaching. Okay. Um, I'm gonna say two things here. There's no great team I've been on as a coach where we didn't have a great manager. So someone once said, Well, behind every great coach is a great manager. And I said, I don't agree with that at all. I think it's the manager and the coach together, behind them, is a great team, right? The manager role to me is just as important as the coaching role. And when I am a head coach, my first appointee or hire, if I'm doing it at that level, is the manager because it's just not doable without a fantastic manager, right? So we kind of walk together in that front. I don't want people to misunderstand this, right? From a hockey standpoint, when I'm coaching, this is me, Mike. You can put your two cents in this too. I want to focus on the hockey. And a lot of times, managers are pushing parents aside from getting to me. At the higher levels, they're pushing the media aside. Like they're letting me coach the game because that's where my focus has to be. In the situations where I have not had that kind of help, it becomes overwhelming. And, and I'll say this from a youth hockey standpoint: you're you might inadvertently take me away from the kids who I'm trying to coach because I'm getting distracted with drama, or it could be a good thing. Like, hey, where do you want to go for dinner tonight? What are we gonna do? Like, I want you to figure that out so I can coach the team. Now, here's my question. I just did a whole rant on how you're enabling the coach. What can we as coaches do to help you, the manager? All right, because like I just said, it's just as important. You also need to focus on the things that you're gonna do, and I can't be coming up to you and be like, hey, hey, have you done this yet? Where's this at? Where's the team like like, no, that's that's that's not what I want to do. So, what can we do as coaches to help you, the manager?

SPEAKER_02 20:45

Um, I think empowering managers is important. Like if the manager says something it should be made role, right? And as far as whether it's like staying in the same hotel, like if it comes from the coach, like all of a sudden you know you have to do it. Um, if you have to be at a season pre-training, I can ask nicely, but of course, if it comes from the coach, maybe they'll listen a little bit more. So I think that, but it just takes time to build that trust too, right? If I'm working with like, like I said, I'm I'm now managing two teams this fall, and it it's it's starting from scratch, right? With I've never done this before. And so after managing the BRIC team, I obviously have a ton of experience and putting the future season together. But I think it's just about making sure that expectations are set and building that trust and hopefully building up really quickly once they see that it makes their lives easier.

SPEAKER_00 21:34

And to your point, right? And this is the action item when you're having that first meeting at the beginning of the season. I do think most people do this when you're introducing, hey, I'm the head coach, these are my assistant coaches. The manager is in that conversation, not as a side piece. Like, this is our manager, I'm the coach, here's our assistance. And then I would go as far to do what you just said, literally, and tell all the parents and all the kids what this manager says is the rule, or we've discussed the rules, this is how it is. Like she is in charge of this. I agree with you 100% on enabling because there's nothing worse. I've seen this too, when uh a manager comes up and a coach and says, Hey, listen, this player, this is a real life scenario. Uh, this player really badmouthed me in the locker room and didn't follow the rule. And the coach goes, Oh, it's it's okay, they'll figure it out. No, no, no, no. No, if a player disrespects your manager, it is our responsibility as a team, really, to take care of that and to make sure that player and that family and all the kids know in the locker room. No, we will not be disrespecting this person, and that is no different than disrespecting me or the assistants or each other. So again, sorry, I'm going into coach mode a little bit the way I'm talking. I apologize for that. But no, I just absolutely right.

SPEAKER_04 22:41

Like, I think I think even me, like in my whole career, I think I've always made sure like the manager or the equipment people or anybody that's involved with the team like is in the team photo, is in the team events, like is it is is an equal member of you know what we're doing? Because that success has to come for that. But Christine, I would ask you and Christy, because because because you've been involved with so many different teams at every level, right? From the youth hockey to college, what are the pitfalls have you seen that managers can get into with the coaching staff? Like, where do you think all of a sudden, like I know we we call it like staying in your lane? But it's not really staying in your lane, it's it's more about like what are some of the things that you've seen and Christy too that that all of a sudden you're like, oh my god, I know this person's the manager, but they're actually making this harder for the coach. I'm gonna ask Christy first.

SPEAKER_00 23:31

Yeah, you're the guest of honor, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 23:34

Yeah, that's that's a great question. So, what has happened where like the the team manager has failed, basically? Is that what you're asking?

SPEAKER_04 23:44

Yeah, like well, just one of the things that can make you know that that's gonna help it's not gonna allow a manager to be successful. I mean, sometimes you get off like, and I'll use examples. Like, I get it all the time, like, oh, I gotta tell, you know, somebody coming to me and say, I gotta tell you something, so and so should be playing with this person, yeah. They're a better line mate, and they're probably a better right winger with this person. And I'm like, whoa, whoa, whoa, let's let's let's put the brakes on. Now maybe that's my fault for not developing the position, but you know, where do you see like that's where managers probably just don't go it has to be managers?

SPEAKER_01 24:14

Yeah, and and I've and I do I have seen over the years where a lot of parents will try and get in the ear of the manager, thinking that this is a great way to influence the coach. And I would caution parents not to do that. That's every ear. Yeah, that is so don't you think so, Christy?

SPEAKER_02 24:33

I mean, I feel like I'm comfortable after a full day of watching break hockey games and listening to I promise you the last thing I want to do is talk more hockey and go to the coaches and and right regurgitate everything that was just like it's just not my priority list. Like, I think I have like 10 other things I needed to get done for the following day.

SPEAKER_00 24:52

Kids gotta eat. Kids gotta eat.

SPEAKER_02 24:55

Yeah. But I get it, right? Like you're a parent, it's a high stress situation. Like you think your kid is the most important, but like that there are 16, 17 kids who whose parents feel the same way. I I think it's just about prioritizing, like what when you're kind of a sounding board or a therapy session versus when it's like an actual issue, and you need to write that along to the coach, right?

SPEAKER_00 25:17

Well, and I can say this too. Um, and I I've talked to managers about this. Like, I think one of the things you forego when you become a manager is you you can't commiserate with the parents, even if you want to, right? Um, what's funny to most parents is sometimes as a coach, I want to commiserate, but it's like I can't you can't do that, right? You can't go do that. So uh I think a big pitfall is if you're gossiping as a manager, this is really anybody, but the manager specifically, if you're gossiping and commiserating, kind of I'm gonna say it like behind the coach's back, uh, that's a pitfall. Now, now most managers won't do that, to be fair, but it's it's it's it's not something you think about a lot of times because parents come up to you and be like, oh, oh right, and it's like you just can't engage in that. Uh vice versa, um, and and you just brought this up, which is great, is what's getting from the manager to the coach, right? So, like what I've always told a manager is look, if someone tells you something in confidence, unless it's like going to harm someone, do not ever break their confidence. Like, I don't need to know, I don't want to know. If they told you they trust you. Um, and with that said, like, if if something's an emergency, uh absolutely if it needs to be elevated to me, whatever that is, then you know there's there's rules about that. But you know, there's a trust here that goes for I always say this about captains too. Like, I trust the manager, and the manager has to trust the parents, the parents have to trust the manager, and the manager has to trust the coach. That's the that's the way it has to go. Um, and if I ever have a season where parents don't commiserate, I will let you guys know. We'll be on episode 4,575, all right. It'll be like weekend on 30s, I'll be like rocking across the street.

SPEAKER_04 26:54

Um, well, and I think it's the same way if you're you know if you've listened to this show in the past. I mean, it's it's it's the same, it's the same thing you'd expect from your assistant coach, right? That you don't want your assistant coach at the bar after a game going, yeah, I can't believe what Benelli did. I I mean I would have not played that kid in that situation, right? You know, and that's where managers, I mean, uh Christy, do you feel um or Christine, do you feel like that that there was any like did any that did you feel ever like all of a sudden after a game and it didn't work out, like that people avoided you in any way? Like said, okay, well, I'm not even gonna. I hope I got it.

SPEAKER_00 27:30

I don't even mean like are they listening?

SPEAKER_04 27:32

I I I think it's more like, oh, I don't want if I if if I'm showing my emotion, I don't want her telling the coaching staff. I think that's but I think that's where you have to build that relationship, right?

SPEAKER_02 27:42

Yeah, I agree. I, you know, obviously there were some tough losses, there were some great wins at Brick. Like, you know, it's I think everyone likes to chat about him after, whether it's the coaches, whether it's the manager, whether it's you know the parents. But I every day, thank goodness, was like a new day with a new game, which helped a lot. But sure the commiserating, I agree. Like it's one thing just to you know say you're bummed, and then it's another thing to really try to make a big change and try to get in the coaches' ear. It's not gonna end well for everyone. Like we have our my kids are so lucky, like they play for the highest caliber coaches, truthfully. I I feel very lucky, and so I'm not gonna be telling them how to do their jobs. That is that is not hard.

SPEAKER_01 28:29

Not your lane, right?

SPEAKER_02 28:30

No, and um, I would caution parents not to tell their coaches how to do their jobs because you know they they know what they're doing, and so I I'm just trying to make people's lives easier in the background and make sure it's a great experience for everybody. And it it's such a journey, and I I love being a part of it and kind of getting to know the managers on other teams as well. You know, I have great rapports with a bunch of them, other coaches, like the parents. It's really fun, but it only takes one or two people to ruin it, right? Oh, oh yeah.

SPEAKER_00 29:02

I'll say this too. We we've had we've had former NHL players on this show, some who were Hall of Fame bound, and they've told us that parents have come up to them when they're coaching youth hockey and told them what to do. Yeah, and it's like it's like I don't I don't know how to say this to you guys, they don't need your help with that part of the game. Uh, but it's it's a great point, right? And and again, not to turn the episode into the commiseration, I want I will move on from this too. But you know, I always remind parents, and managers have to do this too, coaches. Like, look, you learn after doing this, your first thoughts after a game are not the things you should be listening to, like win or loss, too. By the way, when you when you're winning, by the way, we're the greatest coaches in the world and the players bet players, but you lose a game by one goal on overtime. Well, here's the 74 things you should have done in this game that would have changed the outcome. Like, it's a game, okay? It's a game. We're not gonna make every right decision, and we have to learn too. But commiseration in general, you gotta try and control it. You gotta try. And and managers play such a huge role in quelling that crowd. Again, I am so thankful when I have a manager after a loss where the parents are just um look, I love parents, I love the families, but but they have opinions on how the game should have gone. And I think a lot of times I'm shielded from that from the manager saying, Yeah, you know, they know what they're doing, you know, they're they put the time in, like they're dedicating a lot of time. So all right.

SPEAKER_01 30:22

I gotta I gotta bring up another. It wasn't on our list of topics to talk about, but I'm gonna do it anyway. It's that dirty little F word, Mike Benelli's favorite, fundraising.

SPEAKER_00 30:36

I knew where you were going with that.

SPEAKER_01 30:37

I know he's like, write the check. Don't even talk about fundraising. But how do you get everybody on the same page? Because this is always every year it was a big struggle because some people want to, some people just want to write the check. You know, some teams found it a great way to bond and actually teach the kids some good life skills if you get the kids involved in the fundraising. How do you get everybody on the same page with fundraising?

SPEAKER_02 31:03

Yeah, dirty little word.

SPEAKER_04 31:06

I by the way, I only don't like fundraising when it's not my team. With my team, I love fundraising.

SPEAKER_02 31:14

Uh well, so thankfully, I haven't had to be too involved in this notion just yet that we had uh the families pay their own way. But I do think going back to, you know, you have families from different backgrounds, different, you know, countries where the exchange rate, like I said, isn't the same. Like it was really funny. Like you had the Americans in Edmonton like thinking this was the greatest thing in the world, but you had to remember, like the Canadians had to come to us multiple times. Like that adds up really quickly. And so just making sure that you were kind of aware of the costs adding up, I think, is super important. And trying to get ahead of that, you know, if there is situations like I definitely have a team fund on one of my teams where we pay for extra tournaments in addition to the hockey, and just making sure that you do it in installments and you set expectations and that you communicate to parents like what the obligations are going to be. And if there's ever a situation, um, you know, I'm that's like something very personal. I'm always happy to talk to parents about that on the side. Um, but I I do think for the most part it's uncomfortable conversations and it's on the manager to have them. Um, but it's also just kind of like being cost conscious when you can. And we have some amazingly generous parents who donate um team parties and lunches and dinners and outings. I mean, our kids are so lucky um that they have parents that are so generous, but you know, not everyone comes from the same background. So I I do think the fundraising is hard, it's so team dependent. I would say that just communicating and getting a sense from your respective teams what their appetite is, so that no one feels behind, but also like just making sure that you know that parents can come to you if they do have these, you know, issues that they probably don't want to voice to the team as a whole. Like that's your responsibility to be empathetic to that.

SPEAKER_01 33:02

Right. You gotta be able to build that trust and confidence with parents too. Yeah, good.

SPEAKER_02 33:06

Yeah, the kids forget how expensive hockey is, you know, like it's it is crazy. And so we'll find out one day.

SPEAKER_04 33:14

Yeah, oh yeah. Christine, you met you, Christine, you mentioned it earlier, you know, about your shout-out, right, to some of the people that help you. But what do you think? Like thinking about managing, thinking about the roles that a manager has to do, what would be like your top like, and and just to Christy's point with the fundraising, like what would be your top things that you would want to delegate out? Like if you're managing and you're talking to another manager, say, the first thing I would delegate out is this, this, this, and this. Like, because now you're really managing the managers. Like the way I always look at like the more people you can get on your team helping you, you know, obviously, if you're doing multiple teams, or I'm sure there's a lot of people out there that are managing, like and I I you know I I belong to a bunch of different clubs, like the Lions Club and this group and that group, and it's always the same people. Like, if there's a barbecue, it's the same three people. If there's a fundraiser, it's the same three people. Like, so you know, when we're in the manager world, you know, uh the manager of a hockey team is probably managing their son's Little League team and probably their lacrosse team, and they're probably part of the PTA. It's just those type of people. So, what would you say are what would you because you know what would you say are some of the things that you think a manager should focus on delegating out quickly? Um, like like in my head, it's like timekeeping. That would be number one delegation to me. But I mean just like things that you would suggest that people should look at and uh and and and Lee and Christy too, talking about it, like because we've been involved in so long. Like, what do you think the things are that successful managers know how to delegate out quickly but still manage?

SPEAKER_02 34:44

Yeah, the timekeeping is like top of mind, right? Like if I'm putting it in the group chat, I need volunteers. You and I better get a volunteer for timekeeping and for music right away. Like that that's an easy ask. Um, so that one is definitely one. I would also say um I'm not super creative, so I love that I have this fabulous mom, Kelly, who is so good with swag designing, executing, gathering, you know what I mean? Like that's a great one. Jennifer loves throwing teen parties, you know, always signed her up for that, and then doing all the reservations. Like those are what I personally love delegating.

SPEAKER_00 35:19

Yeah, well, and and a newer one is locker room parent in youth. Yeah, because you have to have somebody in the locker room now. And uh, I'll be honest with like you you gotta delegate that to the right person because that that can be one, you know, you put the wrong person in there. Um, you know, I want to did anybody have any more by the way? I I have another question for it, but I don't want to.

SPEAKER_01 35:39

I I would I think we need to get into communication too, because that's really important. Like, what's the best way to keep the team connected? Email, uh, you know, do you have uh Snapchat? Or what do you guys do to stay all on the same page? What's the easiest way to communicate?

SPEAKER_00 35:55

What's your preferred method?

SPEAKER_02 35:56

I personally don't have TikTok or Snapchat, so those are not my preferred methods. Right. Amen.

SPEAKER_01 36:03

I'm with you.

SPEAKER_02 36:05

I don't think emails always get read. Like I love group chat, and so we had one on the platform as part of like CJR for Brick that included coaches and our chaperone um up in Edmonton. But and I made like a separate WhatsApp chat that was great for the international folks too. Um, and we were on that. I mean, I probably can pick up my phone now and I still have uh text coming through, which is fun. Like everyone still stays connected. But so I think that's like for more of the day-to-day. Um, not every family loves being a part of that and picking up their phone and seeing a hundred text messages. Right, right. So, how do you deal with that? Uh I don't know. I I think you know, just say like there's a setting, but I tried to, I did something funny is that I actually put a star in front of everything that was like a to-do. Yeah. So that way you could go quickly back to the box and just look at the stars. Yeah. So I think it helped some parents that weren't thrilled about the back and forth joking around. But then, you know, if if you ever needed to like look up a hotel link or look up where we're having dinner or lunch or who owes money for, you know, this, that, or that, like just look up stars and that's kind of like your to-do. I thought that worked really well. Um and then I I'm pretty sure you know Hammy and Jonesy didn't really want to see the thousand text messages come in every day about that particular team, but um, we included them on the CJR chat on on the more important topic.

SPEAKER_00 37:31

Well, yeah, and I always say, too, from a communication front, like there's the things you have to know. And most of the time in most platforms, that's you know, the schedule, if there's a time change, most of that stuff is typically separate from the chat. Um, but I'm with you, Christine. Like, I think more communication is better than less communication. Like, you don't want a dead chat on a team. That's not a good sign, uh, especially from a team camaraderie standpoint. Um, the other thing too is uh, you know, as a coach, right? I over-communicate on purpose, right? Because my attitude is like it might be a little bit annoying, but you'll know when to be there, right? And you you'll know when I'm expecting something from you. I think managers have the right to do that. I think also there's some managers that go, look, I said it once, that should be all I need to say it. And I don't disagree with that either, right? It's it comes out to the people.

SPEAKER_02 38:18

If you have multiple kids though, and like multiple sports, like I do, like it gets to be a lot. So like I'm okay personally with the extra, you know, chats and reminders that come out, but I completely understand that that might not be everyone's appetite. Um it's a mix, and you know, it's great when people voice their uh frustrations either way.

SPEAKER_04 38:37

Yeah, I think for new managers, certainly, and and I found I found this out when we've done like our little like manager pow-wows and getting people involved and saying, okay, listen, we're gonna bring you all together so that we're on a consistent basis, is use the tools that are given to you by the organization and that have the most automatic capability. So, like if you're going in and texting people in a in a separate text chain on your phone that a game's been changed, that's a nightmare. Like that's back, that's back in the days of like telephone, right? Where you called up like two people, the chainless two people, let them like I think once you once you're on, like if your organization has um an app and they have a communication tool, my suggestion, and again, people could differ on this, but use as much of the power in that uh uh communication tool as you can, whereas the chat, the rostering, the scheduling, uh you know, changes in schedule, because then people aren't going to 17 different ways to look for the information they want. And I think what also does, and I think for a manager and a coach, it it helps control the narrative. Like I've seen so many teams, yes, they have the app and they have that program, but then the parents have their own separate uh text chain, and then the kids have their own separate text chain. And you know, as as they get older, it gets worse, right? So I think you know, having the ability to keep everything focused in and say, this is the official piece of what we do. What you're doing over here, I'm not really involved in. And I think, you know, uh Christine, it would be like that. That's like where the coaches feel more at ease, too, because they're not involved in the drama, they're just involved in the facts. Like, game is at three, beat air at two, second rink, and it changed today. And I think you know, can you know, and I'm sure so again, jumping into the manager role and the voluntole piece, use the tools that are given to you. Don't reinvent, you don't need to reinvent the wheel. I think just use the tools that are given to you to give you the most power within the organization.

SPEAKER_00 40:38

Very helpful. I gotta say, real quick, just for the audience, this will be a fun little exploration through time. Uh, you may be asking, what did we do before this technology? Well, let's go back to 1995, right? There was a time change, practice or game. We had a thing, you heard me say it a minute ago, called the phone chain. This is how teams communicated. There's no internet back then, or very it's very early internet. So we had a list of every parent, this was done before the season, and their phone numbers, and every parent had a responsibility to call the next parent on the list, and this is how information would go. It might take 48 hours for a message to get from the first parent to the last parent. We had rules like if someone didn't pick up, you went to the next parent. But like, there was a there was a significant chance someone would not get the information and not not be there, right? Like, this is how we had to do it before.

SPEAKER_04 41:27

Uh, especially I have these conversations all the time. My siblings, and my my family had five players playing hockey and and and and I don't and a and a house phone, like a corded phone, right? One phone. I don't know, I have zero idea how we didn't end up in rinks that we weren't supposed to be in on the weekend. Like, so like the the tools that we have today, like there really is no conceivable reason for me why you should show up and not know there's a game.

SPEAKER_00 41:53

You didn't get the message, Mike. I didn't get the message, all right. I didn't get the text. I mean, I think about when teams had to travel by train in the NHL, like Magic.

SPEAKER_04 42:01

Uh, you know, I can't these little kids, they don't even travel by train.

SPEAKER_00 42:04

Yeah, we have to go by flights now. Christine, you know, uh, here's this is a funny question we probably should have asked at the beginning. Now, everyone on this show is super involved and super like in into hockey and either coaching or parenting. Um, you know what we didn't ask you is just what are the basic roles of a manager? We asked you what we should delegate, but there's a lot that managers do that I bet you the audience doesn't know about from ice time to practice planning, you know, things like that. So, what what in your mind we'll we'll say bare minimum, a manager is responsible for what?

SPEAKER_02 42:36

Okay, well, um yeah, really interesting. We actually just wanted to give a funny uh shout out to what happened to our brick team. Unfortunately, we had multiple kids show up. You said the plane thing without bags and or sticks. So, like, thank god for air tags. We were tracking on both sides, like on the way there and on the way back. So, like uh that wasn't that was like rather unfortunate. So I think I prefer the train to the plane. You know, we get on the train, you can see it, but you can hold on to it. You can hold on to the there's a reason why I prefer to drive to Toronto sometimes rather than yeah, and track if you want to come on board as a sponsor, we love it. Neither here nor there. Um, so bare minimum, I think uploading games into whatever platform there is. The the ice the practices have the organizations I help with are like amazing. So they do all of that changes, of course, like that's a bare minimum. I have to communicate that. Um, and then hotels, I think is really difficult, making sure that you book all the hotels. I book all the coaches' hotels too, so that's like an added um, you know, wrinkle to things, and making sure that you know they're happy with with everything too, you know. And that's making their lives easier, right? Like they shouldn't be worried about this. Um, so I think like for me, like that's kind of the bare minimum. And then of course, like helping when things go wrong, right? I think the extra stuff is like the team bonding, um, the fat heads, the team swag, like the mini golf, um, you know, et cetera, et cetera, et cetera. But that makes more of the experience. But if you're a manager and you want to do the bare minimum, just throw the games in, update schedules if they change, book the hotels. And I think that that could be um kind of all that you do. But I think, you know, if you want to be a manager, you probably want to do it for different reasons. You want to be a part of it, you want to help make the experience awesome. So, like I'm sure a manager would want to do more.

SPEAKER_00 44:35

Where where is like tournament planning for for the for a regular season? We're talking now, obviously. Not like where does tournament planning fall in for you?

SPEAKER_02 44:44

Uh, so like I said, like uh my oldest plays for the 16s mid-Fairfield, and Danielle has taken care of all the tournaments for the season, which is amazing. Um, because she likes to bunch us up with all of her other teams. So I feel very lucky that I don't have to be the one identifying the tournaments, you know, seeing which ones stack up, which ones are better or worse. Um, as far as for CJR, same thing. Hammy's already identified like which tournaments my daughter's team is going to go to, which is awesome. So just like signing us up for that and bringing We had added one extra, and that was like on me to kind of get that going through the preseason of BRIC. So we did three pre-Brick tournaments as a team just to make sure that we gelled, we were playing well. Yeah, it was awesome for you boys. Um, and and so kind of figuring that out. So, as far as tournaments, like this year's kind of figured out, which is great. And so now it's just about plugging all of our league games, um, any additional teams. Like, I love when other managers reach out from other really good programs saying, like, hey, do you guys have a free weekend? Um, I try to understand where the parents are in terms of you know, do they have mental capacity to do what we're doing?

SPEAKER_03 45:54

My answer is too, right? Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 45:55

Um, as long as we host, sometimes the answer is always yes. But it do I really think people want to, you know, drive four hours one way for one game? Like, probably not. So I think like preempting that kind of stuff, seeing if we could get two games, if we're gonna drive that far, and then like sussing it out with the coach and seeing like if if she thinks it's worth it, I think is important. I would never make a decision solely based on my perception, but um managers do it can come with a great hypothetical answer and work from there.

SPEAKER_01 46:27

Right. Yeah, sometimes it is hard to get everybody on the same page.

SPEAKER_02 46:32

But have a mix of people, right? Like some people want to travel at the weekend, and then other people don't want to travel at all.

SPEAKER_01 46:39

It's like another thing of the year, we were on a travel team, and half the parents said, Well, we're on a travel team, but we don't really want to travel. So it's like, okay, then why are you on a travel team? So yeah, sometimes it's it's tough to get everybody on the same page. But team managers can have some fun too. And I'll throw this out there. For example, with this one great team manager, she was she was just on the ball all the time, and she kind of surprised us. We had a tournament, and she said, Okay, kids, dads and kids, you guys are going to play laser tag at noon. Moms, I booked a winery lunch for us. I'm like, Oh, I love you. So good. I didn't really want to go to Laser Tag with the kids, so yeah. So it's yeah, you can have a lot of fun with it too.

SPEAKER_04 47:31

Yeah, I think in our I think in our world too, that the hockey's so different because it's it's because you're probably spending uh uh, you know, like like Christy was saying, and Christine was saying that you know you're you're spending day days and days and days together. Like so to find ways to break up that that that time and and give families the chance to get to know each other on a different level outside the game is so important. And usually, you know, we go to a tournament somewhere, you're not you're not playing at one and then at four, right? There's usually a pretty big gap there. So so finding creative ways to and I think coaches have been much more lenient nowadays, like where I remember when I was like a first started coach, like if we were at a hotel, the kids weren't allowed to swim, you know, they weren't allowed to you know use their energy in any other way. Now they're playing knee hockey and swimming and water parks and everything else. So I think you know, letting kids be kids and letting parents be parents. I mean, you know, sometimes it it it is uh, you know, I think in our it's certainly in our region, I mean, some of this is very, very social for parents. Almost like, you know, we have a lot of, you know, in our organization, we taught it's like parental entertainment is is almost as important as the kid entertainment. And I think it's uh, you know, I think that's very you have to be conscious of that and how you set that up.

SPEAKER_02 48:42

So for brick, um, uh with the help of last year's former manager, AJ, who was incredible at kind of like helping me and guiding me through all this, um, I had inherited a brick bible, which I then updated for this year. And to your point, like the the number one um slot that people were most excited about was the coaches and mom's dinner one night. Um and then another night it was the coach's and dad's dinner. And to your point, like yeah, you had to find someone to take care of your kid if there's only one parent. And um, it's fun, it's like a great reason to get dressed up, go to a nice restaurant that you probably wouldn't take your children to, um, and then you know, hang out after. And it was it was like a lot of fun. And so I loved making that brick bible. It was a a labor of love. It was like 12 PDF pages with the entire schedule and getting it updated. Um, and I hope to never have to update that again.

SPEAKER_04 49:37

Can I ask you something? Because I think it's one and done. I I think this is brilliant. So, can I ask you something? Will you pass that on? Like, and I think I think it's so important. Like, I think that's such a great aspect of, you know, you do all this, right? And then you're like, oh, I'm done. It's it's April. Now what? Like, so I think the the opportunity to pass it on and and now give somebody the cheat code to getting ahead of a lot of this stuff is so important. I think it you bring up a great, you know, just what a great opportunity, like for the next manager uh of any team, right, to say, listen, I just have to, um it's right here. I just to follow this kind of and then I could add my own flavor to it. Like I said, depending on who you're with and what your strong suit is and what you're better at doing, you know, having that blueprint though for success, I think is is probably every organization's job to give to every new manager, no?

SPEAKER_02 50:28

Yeah, and I'm like really grateful because I work really closely with um the 2014 then Fairfield manager Ashley. I just got off the phone with her before I was talking to you guys, and she had been you know one of Daniel's managers last year. And so having that support system and having her kind of teach me, you know, preferences, how to go about doing stuff. Um, we work together sometimes, like it's a huge help. And so I'm super excited to see who the manager next year for the Brickbeer program is. And you know, I know AJ got me so excited for it, right? Like just saying, like, this is gonna be an awesome experience. You're gonna love being a manager, you know, you get extra stuff, A, B, and C, you get to go in the pit as the manager. There's like a manager and coach's dinner one night that you get invited to, like, all that stuff, like kind of makes it feel like extra special and that you're doing all this extra work, but then you get like a really unique view into the tournament.

SPEAKER_00 51:18

I I think it is special, and I think the manager on every team should be treated special, right? Again, it's a tremendous amount of work, it is an unbelievable amount of work. I think in some ways it's more than the coaching staff has to do. Or if you want to look at it differently, like I enjoy making practice plans, I enjoy being on the ice coaching the kids or coaching my teams. Like, like I love doing that. Yeah, I can't say that everything you have to do is something I would enjoy. Most of it, I would not enjoy doing it. Now, I'm not saying that there's not people out there that do enjoy that work, all right? But it I mean, it's a lot of work, and and I'll turn this into a question a little bit too, Christine. It's like you got the whole season set, everything's good. I got the stuff in, I got the games in, uh, the root call, they canceled your game, they canceled your practice, uh, the snowstorm, kids are out of school, these 12 kids can't make it. I mean, there's also consistent changes throughout the season, but it's not like it's not done. Like, how do you how do you deal with that?

SPEAKER_02 52:14

Yeah, I well, I think if you have everything prepared, right? Like ahead of time, it helps tremendously, which is awesome. And then um snowstorms, like you can't predict that it happens, right? Lost equipment, you certainly can't predict that, but you better know where the closest pure hockey is so that way when you land, you can like go figure it out and we'll like patch it together, you know. And it it really is kind of just being like a lifeline, I think, to parents, especially on the road when you're traveling and right um making sure that everything goes smoothly. I don't mind it. Um, probably a masochist, but I really enjoy this stuff because um you're a problem solver, right?

SPEAKER_00 52:50

Like that that's what it is. You're a problem solver.

SPEAKER_02 52:52

I used to work full-time and I work part-time, and I joke, like I left my full-time job to um you know drive my kids around the northeast so they can play hockey.

SPEAKER_00 53:01

It's a full-time job.

SPEAKER_02 53:02

Yeah, what didn't happen any other way?

SPEAKER_04 53:04

Yeah, every phone every phone call I have a coaches every day. I'm like, I just call them up. I've said, I'm sorry to interrupt. I know, I know work keeps getting in the way of your hockey coaches, but but it but it's it's all part of the game, right? So let me ask you something. So it's early, it's gonna be early in the season when this episode comes out. Uh, there's probably still a lot of teams that are that are looking for managers. You know, what would you do? Are you available? No, I'm just available. We already got a lot of people.

SPEAKER_01 53:28

We'll do Zoom calls with you.

SPEAKER_04 53:30

So I guess I guess my question is, what can we do as organiz or organizations, coaches, what can we do to entice a good manager? Like, what are some of the things that we is it swag? Is it first line play? Is it uh don't have to ever do the clock in music? Like, what is it that you know we have to do as organizations and coaches to entice really good people that are organized to say, oh, this is something I can do and want to do?

SPEAKER_02 53:57

I think it's always great when there's like uh an ask, like, does anyone want to be, you know, voluntole to be manager? Like, could you volunteer with me? But I think if if you're a coach and you ask directly for someone to be manager, um, then it's really hard to say no and like ask me how I know, right? Like I um, but it I mean that in like a nice way. Like if if someone went out of their way to ask me to do it and they obviously think I could do a job of a good job, like of course I'm gonna say yes, right? And goes back to like kind of being a pleasure and honor to do this stuff. Like your kids are involved. Um, I don't, I think, yeah, it's not, it's great not to have to do the clock for the music and to make sure I ask for volunteers, but I think it's also like if a coach comes to a person and says, Hey, like, would you like to be manager? You could farm out whatever you want to the people you want on the team. Like, that's great, right? Like give them the ability to delegate whatever they can. And it's really important that they feel like they have a voice and the ability to kind of craft the manager role to anything they want. Um, I also think like managers probably don't realize, but you get to kind of craft the schedule a little bit. So if you have multiple kids playing, then you could make it so that way you could try to see as many of them play on a weekend as possible, or you don't have two parents traveling in two separate directions. Like, I'm not saying it's always perfect, but there's sometimes if all other things are even and you're choosing between two days and one of them works better for you, like that's kind of a great thing to be able to do for your family. And so it's a little wins here and there, but I do think um making sure that they understand that it's like kind of a privilege to do it. And I fully like I didn't play sports, I can't even skate. So, like I had no idea that this whole world existed until my kids started playing sports, which is like kind of right for the top one, huh?

SPEAKER_00 55:42

You went right to the tippy top of managing.

SPEAKER_02 55:44

What do I do with all my free time? Is what I'm really wondering. Um, so like I I think maybe first time players on a team might not be the right parents to approach because they might not know. Like, I didn't know like this was kind of a cool thing to do. So, but the second, third, fourth year, I think those are the better folks to kind of lean on and ask.

SPEAKER_04 56:05

It took me a it took me a long time. I had a manager for a long time. It took me a long time to realize that her uh winter uh ski house was near all the tournaments we used to go to. I'm like, how do we always promote these tournaments? Oh, I didn't tell you that we have a house. I love that for my own. Okay, so yeah, so you get a lot of you get a lot of power in in the scheduling and laying things out and and multi and multitasking, no doubt about it. Um but I think it comes with the pitfalls too, that everybody's always like, okay, well, you know, like I've always seen from a manager's point of view, I'm like, if the manager took their time to do this, then I I don't want to hear anybody chirping in that does nothing. You know, it's like, oh I can't believe we're at this, you know, we're at this hotel. What's that? Okay, next time you do you you book the hotels. But I think it's um but I think it's really that that that that dance, right, from a manager's point of view of when you're communicating, when you have the support of the coaching staff in the organization, when you have the support of other parents, like you're you're you know, I'm sure like if you're if you're like confident that a coach is asking you to do this, and then a couple other parents have you asking them, now you got a real team of people that are helping have their kids have success. And I think that's really the key to do it. I think the managers that are, in my opinion, uh that are not successful are the ones that try doing every single thing and don't don't don't put anything out there and keep everything to themselves.

SPEAKER_00 57:26

You're gonna kill yourself doing that.

SPEAKER_01 57:27

Yeah, it has to be a good thing.

SPEAKER_04 57:29

It just causes animosity as well. I think it just causes the issue that everybody thinks, like, okay, well, I I'm gonna do it better. Okay, well, let me find the five people that can do it better than me, because those are the people I'm gonna ask to help me.

SPEAKER_02 57:41

Yeah, and also like to it's not only about that, which I love that advice and I take that advice, it's also about like I these are all adults, like I don't want to have to chase you to do stuff. Like, if I put a room block in the chat and I put a reminder, like that's it. I'm not gonna be following it.

SPEAKER_00 57:57

You do the work.

SPEAKER_02 57:58

And at that point, if you text me a week before the tournament, you know, I I gave you two reminders. Um, I'm I'm doing the best I can, I think. And also like to that point, I don't think I fully appreciate this either. Like, I don't always have the the choice what hotels we stay in, right? I'm given like maybe two or three, and I'm picking the one that I truthfully think is the best for my kid as well as all of your kids, right? And so um I they're not always gonna be the perfect option, I think, for everyone, but it's it's like doing the best you can and making sure that people book when they're supposed to, I think is would make it.

SPEAKER_04 58:30

Well, and there is no excuse for not following these people don't live in caves. I mean, everybody, everybody has the everybody has the app, everybody sees the the notice. There's zero reason why they can't follow up. Get a call like on a Thursday that they don't know what hotel they're staying in. Well, that's on them.

SPEAKER_00 58:45

I'm gonna I'm gonna bring this up. There's there's so much we talk about on this show that we I'll give you a good example, right? We always say to when we're coaching to the parents, we tell the parents, I am not a babysitter for your kid, I am not a coach for your kid. That is a I'm not here to babysit, I'm here to coach. Your kid needs to show up kind of with the understanding of we're doing we're doing hockey today, we're doing work today. Uh, I'm not a babysitter. That also applies to parents with the managers. Like you're not a babysitter, Christine. Like you've done the work to help them. It's not my job to remind you 50 times because you're having a busy day. And here's the thing. I believe that you're super busy, parents. I believe you are unbelievable parents or unbelievably well, unbelievable parents and unbelievably busy. You know who else is unbelievably busy? The manager and the coaches. And we have things going on too. We're not babysitters from that part, and we're definitely not personal assistants. All right. And again, if you're listening to the show, you're probably just nodding at home, agreeing with that.

SPEAKER_02 59:43

Yeah, but like I when I was like brick manager, I I definitely got requests from people asking about like it in like a cute way. Like, they feel like, oh, like what sightseeing is there around? Like, I I'm not like the cruise director, you know.

SPEAKER_01 59:56

Oh, Julie of the love boat.

SPEAKER_02 59:58

I would give like my two cents, and I'm always happy to help, but like there's Google, you know.

SPEAKER_00 1:00:03

Well, also, also, Christy, one of the best things you can do when you get a question like this, because I've done that, is like, you know, I haven't looked it up. Would you like to take the time?

SPEAKER_01 1:00:09

Yeah, that's perfect.

SPEAKER_00 1:00:11

That's that's kind of it'd be really great. And yeah, I don't know.

SPEAKER_01 1:00:14

Let me know when you find out.

SPEAKER_00 1:00:15

If they go, no, no, no, that's a that's okay. That's the answer.

SPEAKER_04 1:00:18

It's not, it's not like I mean, it's not like, hey, can you just tell me the the best restaurant that has the best croissants up in uh Edmonton? Good to I'm like, what do you mean? Just Google, like you're asking me. I said, I've never been to Edmonton.

SPEAKER_00 1:00:27

Yeah, let me know when you find out.

SPEAKER_01 1:00:29

Yeah, I'll just go.

SPEAKER_00 1:00:31

I can tell you we're gonna get a good cheesesteak, but we're not in Philadelphia right now. Absolutely. Um just to just to close this out, I I've been writing notes the whole episode. Three things I wrote down here that I think uh uh denote how great of a person you are and also how great of a manager you are, right? You've said multiple times it's a pleasure and an honor. All right. And I think look, I I believe coaching is a pleasure and an honor as well. That's why I always say managers and coaches are on the same wavelength here, right? You've got to approach managing with this mindset if you're thinking about doing it. It is a pleasure and an honor. There's also going to be problems that come with any position in hockey, but you have to approach it with that mindset. You are getting to steward a team of kids and affect their lives and the lives of their families and the lives of the coaches. That is an honor. All right. And any and any time you look at it takes a village, right? A pleasure as well. Like it's it if you want it to be negative, it will become negative. If you want it to be fun, you have a lot of control over that too. And then the other thing you wrote down that I think is such an important point that you mentioned multiple times is perspective. Is it's so hard sometimes to remember what is my financial situation versus somebody else's financial situation. Oh, let's go stay at the Ritz, this five-star hotel. I've been on teams where I know there are families that cannot afford that hotel, and you have got to be mindful of that. I also know families that are struggling to get gas in the car to get to games. I am extremely conscious of those things as a coach, and so obviously, so is the manager as well. You can't just have the blinders on of, well, this is my experience, this is how things are. Part of managing managing, managing, excuse me, is is kind of just understanding that aspect. And and again, it's just a thought. I'm not I'm not saying you have to go too far into it. Have the thought of, hey, can everyone on this team potentially do this? This and this is the tough part. You can't necessarily bring this up. You can't go up to a family and be like, hey, I know you're on hard times right now. What do you want us? You can't do that, right? But you have to be conscious of it. And that's what I said, perspective. All right. And I think you you've done a tremendous job with that. That's why we had you on. That's why you're the perfect guest. That's why everyone's gonna be writing. Is she available for our team this year? No, actually, how much money you guys got? Maybe she is, she's got a part-time job. We can make this a full-time job. All right, I'm just kidding. No, you've been a fantastic guest and just brought a lot to the table today, and I appreciate it.

SPEAKER_02 1:02:58

This is really fun. Thanks for having me. And yeah, looking forward to uh hearing the feedback and you know the upcoming season.

SPEAKER_00 1:03:06

Absolutely. And Mike Christie, I always say before I close it out, you have anything else you want to say?

SPEAKER_01 1:03:10

Oh no, uh, I love your positivity, Christine. And I bet you we're gonna get a lot of hands raised next time the coach says, Hey, who wants to be a team manager?

SPEAKER_00 1:03:21

Yeah, Christine Manager statue with the in Edmonton.

SPEAKER_01 1:03:26

Yeah, but it's important. Here's a great opportunity to create some really memorable experiences, and that's what this is all about is that journey that we're all on and making it the best for our kids, putting our kids first. So thank you for that.

SPEAKER_04 1:03:40

Yeah, and I think if you're if you're a parent now listening to this and you were a team manager, I mean, take uh take the advice of um you know Christine's earlier uh counterpart there and and pay it forward and make it easier for the next person coming in those roles. Uh especially maybe if you even if you're a manager, uh you were the manager of a team and now the team you're on, you're not a manager of that team, but you you you're on the same team. So I think I love the idea of you know uh everybody helping each other out and understanding what that role is and what it entails. And I think it's even better if you have the cheat book and the Bible for the next group, hand it off. I think that's unbelievable. I think it's a great, a great uh resource for everybody to use, but really appreciate you being on and and giving uh you know your perspective and and and your experience, and and hopefully uh you know this will help a lot of a lot of parents uh going through the next season.

SPEAKER_02 1:04:31

I hope so.

SPEAKER_00 1:04:32

Oh, go ahead.

SPEAKER_02 1:04:33

No, I hope so. I was just gonna say thanks for having me. It was really fun, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 1:04:36

No, it was great to have you too. And my my final notes for the coaches out there. You got a great manager, go get the hundred dollar Starbucks gift card at the start of the season and hand it to your manager and just say thank you in advance. All right, and and you know, pamper that person. All right, they're doing a tremendous amount of work to make your life easy. And and I, coaches, you know that, right? Just go the extra mile, get them something, right? I I think because you know you're getting a gift from you from them at the end of the year. Who do you who do you think's going in the team snap and saying, hey, we should get a good coach gift this year? That's the manager doing that. All right, so get them the get them the gift card.

SPEAKER_04 1:05:10

But uh if you're if you're my manager's year, don't worry. I'm taking advice from all of this. I will, I will be, I'll be following through.

SPEAKER_00 1:05:17

This episode has been redacted from your your uh organization. Christine again, thanks so much. It's a fantastic episode. Uh gang, listen, if you've got questions, if you've got thoughts about being a manager or anything like that, email us, team at our kidsplayhockey.com. And remember, you can always text us using the link accompanying this episode in the description. Um, just to let us know what you think and we'll text you back. But uh for Christine, for Christy, for Mike, I'm Lee, this has been a really great episode of Our Kids Are Managed in Hockey. And we'll see you on the next one, everybody. Take care. We hope you enjoyed this edition of Our Kids Play Hockey. Make sure to like and subscribe right now if you found value wherever you're listening, whether it's a podcast network, a social media network, or our website, our kidsplayhockey.com. Also, make sure to check out our children's book, When Hockey Stops, at When Hockey Stops.com. It's a book that helps children deal with adversity in the game and in life. We're very proud of it. But thanks so much for listening to this edition of Our Kids Play Hockey, and we'll see you on the next episode.