Our Girls Play Hockey: Hayley Scamurra on Hockey IQ, Work Ethic, and Becoming a Better Player

SPEAKER_02 1:20

This episode is powered by NHL Sense Arena. Hello, hockey friends and families around the world, and welcome back to another edition of Our Girls Play Hockey. It's Lee Elias and Mike Benelli joined by our favorite person in the world, Haley Skimora here today. And it's your favorite episode, gang. It's the QA episode. You know, we put out, I'm always amazed by this, Haley. We go, hey, who's got a question for Haley? We got questions from kids, adults, coaches. They all want to ask you these questions. So this is not your first time on the hot seat. Uh, you're becoming a pro at this too. Um, I say we dive right in. Uh, some some great ones here. Haley, are you ready?

SPEAKER_00 2:06

Yes.

SPEAKER_02 2:07

Okay, I love it. Love the excitement. All right. So listen, uh, first one, first one I'm gonna actually merge. There's two here that I want to merge together because it's very clear we've got some new young listeners to this show uh based on these questions. So Cassidy asks, follow me here. What age did you start playing hockey? All right, Cassidy, again, great question. And Charlotte, who is nine, both these kids around that age, asked, growing up, what skating skill skills set you apart from others? So let's dive into like when did you start? And then what when did you maybe see, like, oh, hey, I'm really good at this, I'm really good at that, so forth and so on.

SPEAKER_00 2:41

That's a great question. Um, I started playing hockey when I was three. My dad played for the Washington Capitals in the 70s, and so we grew up in Buffalo, New York, and his one requirement for our home was that we could build a backyard rink. And so he built one, and I have three older brothers, and so I wanted to get out with them and be on the ice with them as much as I could. And um, I did have to be bragged with MMs at first by him, but uh, eventually I didn't need the MMs every time I was on the ice. So uh that's how I got started. And then for skating skills that set me apart, I'm not gonna lie to you, kids. I don't think my skating skills were like what set me apart. Uh, that wasn't really my forte. I hated power skating back in the day. Uh looking back, I do wish that I did it more. I feel like it would have been nice to have those like skills as like a foundation. So that's usually my one thing for kids, I like to tell. Um I would say it was more so like my work ethic and um my hockey IQ that set me apart, I think, growing up. I think that was something that was very innate with me. It was something my dad drilled into me and all of us kids all the time. It was like understanding the game of hockey. It wasn't really about the specific skills, if you will. Um, but I am grateful that I had that because I think that's helped me as I've grown in my career.

SPEAKER_02 4:02

So the big takeaways here are have a backyard rink, have MMs, lots of MMs on hand. Now, joking aside, um, it's a great answer, Haley. And Mike, I'm actually gonna bring it in here because we talk a lot on this show about you know, skills are important. Like no one, no one's negating that. But the hockey IQ, we do so much talking about hockey IQ, and I love that you're saying, Haley, yeah, no, from a young age, uh, that was important and that set me apart. And Mike, we're seeing that across the board right now, that skill is there, but uh hockey IQ is the big separator, right?

SPEAKER_01 4:35

Well, I mean, the it at Haley's, you know, Haley's being pretty uh modest about her skating ability. I mean, she's a professional hockey player. I mean, you know, so her skating now is at a point where you know she's a she's an exceptional skater. And I think that's the number one thing, right? When you look for a player in today's game, you have to be able to skate. And there's no grabbing and clutching and holding, it just doesn't exist anymore. But that is not what most coaches at the end of the day are defining players by. Everybody at Helly's level and and at the you know, and I'm sure these young ladies' level, you know, when you're growing up and you're playing with the same players, they are all really good skaters. It's what sets them apart. And I don't know if it's not even hockey IQ so much as what she talked about at the beginning was more the work ethic. I mean, if you have, if you are a dog on a bone player, if you're a player who can outsmart other players, if you can figure out a way to show that your effort is gonna overcome any deficiency you have in your skating, any deficiency you have in maybe understanding the game a little bit, um, that is gonna be a really, really you know, feather in your cap to play and continue to play because again, there's great skaters, there's not a lot of great, like just gritty will play through anything and and and try to accomplish. So that piece of advice, I think, is the number one piece. Because all the other stuff will take care of itself, right? If you are just going at it and you're and you're saying, I'm gonna be the best player there is, I'm never gonna give up, and I'm gonna have a great work ethic, those other things will will fall into place.

SPEAKER_02 6:11

Well, and if you've watched Haley play, Mike just described her game, which apparently you've been doing since three years old. Are you still bribed with MMs at the pro level?

SPEAKER_01 6:19

Or now she gets to go now. She goes now, she goes to the VIP lounges and gets all the nice bags and stuff. But I mean, yeah, it's the same thing, right?

SPEAKER_02 6:28

Yeah, no, hell yeah, I don't take you as the type of person of like, I would like all the different colors separated into individual jars. I think if you're if someone someone gives them to you, you're happy. No, you guys look great start to the episode. Um, next one comes from Brandon, who is 10 years old. Uh super great question for somebody 10 years old. What's one thing I can do every day to improve my skills?

SPEAKER_00 6:49

Um I think that's such a great question. Um I think it's super important to focus on being an all-around good player, so not to like hone in on just one skill. I think you can always work on your strengths and like continue to strengthen those, as well as work on some of the things that you're maybe not as great at. Um, maybe something you've noticed that you would like to work on and just work on that for you know a few minutes every day, but not to forget about the other things you're good at and strengthening those as well.

SPEAKER_02 7:21

Yeah, again, great answer. And and going back to the first question, right? That hunger to do that. So for Brandon, I think a big part is like you're asking the question. That's such a huge deal, right? The fact that you want to know. Um, kids, you know, you might be surprised, not everybody asks great questions about how do I get better. They just think some kids think I'm great. And there's yeah, look, there's a place for that too. Don't get me wrong, but I love that you're asking that question. Um, all right, the next two questions come from Coach M. Uh first one is what makes a coachable player? It's a good question from a coach.

SPEAKER_00 7:54

I think a coachable player, you don't take things personally when you're given something to work on. I think coming from a place where like you're curious and you're you want to know more about what they have to offer you or what their insight is, I think is a huge first step and not taking it as like, oh my God, they think I'm terrible, or like immediately kind of taking it as an attack. I think it's taking it as this coach is invested in me, they want to see me do better and they can see my potential and see that like one small thing I can work on that can elevate my game. Um, so I think just making sure you realize that it's coming from a place where they care. Um, obviously, if the coach is delivering it in the right way. And um, I think that's super important is to not take it personally and to always want to get better. I think coachable players always want to improve their game. So they're excited when they get that feedback. They're looking forward to it, they want to know what they can do to improve their game because sometimes it's a small thing that a coach can notice that maybe you're not noticing as much in your own game.

SPEAKER_02 8:57

Yeah, I'll say as a coach too, Haley, that is a great answer that us showing you that we care does not always sound nice, right? Now, again, I'll also say it shouldn't be like I'm in your face screaming in your face. That that time for that has gone. All right. But um, sometimes we do have to be stern, and that's because we care so much. Mike's gonna give us a four-minute breakdown now on how Mike Benelli's school of coaching does it to show no joking aside, like like look, I I've said this on the show a hundred times for the parents, right? You don't know how much we care about your kids. We we really care. All right. Uh, again, not every coach is perfect in that regard, but I know, I know Mike, we care about your kids, right? But it caring doesn't always look like a soft teddy bear landing.

SPEAKER_01 9:41

Uh yeah, everybody, everybody coaches different ways, everybody has different personalities. 95% of the coaches out there are coaching to make sure you get better. They care about their team, they care about their their players. They just do. I mean, there's there very few people can continue to coach with just a centralist mindset of uh this is all about me, and I don't want to get somebody better. But to Haley's point, a coachable player, like somebody that a coach looks at and says, Oh, wow, that's this is somebody that I would probably tell, you know, uh, you know, I like I I would for instance, uh, you know, when I found out Haley was moving teams, you know, I have a couple of good contacts that know all these teams. And they're like, oh my, what a find. And I got a like bullet by bullet by bullet, why this was a great move for that organization to get Haley, right? To me, that's a coachable kid. That's a coachable player. Like that's somebody you say, oh, everybody is speaking about all these qualities of the player. And that's what to me is like, oh, that's a player I want on my team. Never, and by the way, none of it came down. There was no bullets about her skill. None, like none about like her individual hockey ability, which is taken for granted, I think. It's these are all the qualities of this person that's gonna make them fit to this team and how that person is gonna help our team. So I think to to uh is it Brandon? Um no, this is Coach M.

SPEAKER_02 11:02

Coach M.

SPEAKER_01 11:03

Oh, Coach M. Sorry, sorry. So Coach M is as like like when you when you're a coach, just look for those players that just want to want to you know be a sponge uh for their development.

SPEAKER_02 11:14

Yeah, and Mike, I'll add one more thing onto that. That um, especially with kids, you know, sometimes kids portray a certain version of themselves, maybe they're uh annoyed or maybe they're frustrated, but sometimes it's just the passion manifesting itself in that way. And I think that and this is kind of building on your point, Mike. I think it's our job as coaches to recognize when that's passion, you know, versus maybe like a something else, right? Um, you know, like I know I have one player who's ferocious, and I think at times it's uh it's misconstrued as oh, she's mean, or that um, you know, oh there's an anger issue there. And I I see what Haley was talking about of man, no, she's she wants to win, she wants to compete. All right, it's we just have to harness that, right? I mean, she's at the age she's at, she might not even know that yet, you know. But but I think part of the coach is seeing that potential and also bringing it out, and you know, sometimes that means putting your arm around a player's shoulder, um, and then sometimes that also means disciplining a a player, and and also, you know, I think the last thing for me too is like you it like the finding the uncoachable kid, that's a much easier definition. Like, I think they come they come packaged with parents. I love it.

SPEAKER_01 12:24

Yeah, it's just like you ask me, like, well, what's what's uncoach? I don't know if the next question is that, but I mean, what's an uncoachable? It's not, yeah. That's a much easier defined piece than coachable kid. You know, and I think it's just a it's just like listen, at the end of the day, you just want to be around good people, you want to be around good kids that want to learn, and I think good players again, and that uh look, we're coaching the people, not the player.

SPEAKER_02 12:48

And I've always said that our job is as youth coaches, youth coaches is to help them become better versions of themselves, become better people. I think that's true at the pro level, too, to some level, but just with different caveats. All right, coach Coach M's next question comes with a caveat. Uh, she says, Haley, you do not have to answer this if you don't want to. So I'll I'll read the question, okay, and then I will also reword it if you don't want to answer it in a way that you can answer it, if that makes sense. Okay. So she asks, what do you think your weakest skill is and how do you work on it to improve? Or what would your coach say is your weakest skill and how would you work on it to improve? The way I would reframe that is um, how would you recognize if you have a weak skill and how would you approach improving it? It is up to you how you want to answer that question. And thank you, Coach M, for having the wherewithal to think that before asking.

SPEAKER_00 13:37

I appreciate the question. There's always something I try to focus on um in practices and skill work and stuff like that. I think for me, what a big one I like to work on would be my agility and escapability. Um at times I think I could be better at like deceptive moves and different things like that, like in the offensive zone, especially like with the puck. Um, I think that's been a key for me this summer is getting out of turns quicker, um, being more evasive. Um so I I never really described it as like my weaker skill, but I would say it's something that I like to focus on and continue to get better at as I've uh been moving up in the ranks and like the pro leagues and, you know, Olympic level and things like that. I think that's something I can always improve on and get better at. So I would say that's my one of my bigger focuses, something that doesn't maybe come natural to me. It's something that I need to like make sure I'm being deceptive with my, with my eyes, with my shoulders and head and um and then getting out of turns quickly and not getting like stuck in the ice and um being able to move my feet uh in a more agile way.

SPEAKER_01 14:46

You know, Haley, I mean, I'm wondering if you did you did you, because you're around some so many great players, right? Did you try to model a little bit after another player you've seen do that? Or somebody that like you said, wow, that person really sticks out in my mind that they have great escapability or they have great, you know, the ability to to read the play quicker. And these are the skills that they have, whether it's their edge work, whether it's their body, whether it's their their deception. Like you said, is there any is there any player you don't even name the player? Just are there any players that you would model after and say, well, wow, that I saw that player doing that. I'm gonna mimic a little bit of that.

SPEAKER_00 15:19

There's a lot of players that do that. I think um so but I I wouldn't say that I necessarily model it after anyone. It's more so that I've noticed it's something I maybe don't do as often as I could in the game. And it's something that I want to incorporate more into my game to make me more of a dynamic player.

SPEAKER_02 15:38

Yeah, and for all the opposing PWHL teams who listen to our kids play hockey, um, all I heard was Skomora's coming for you. Gotta be careful next year. She's getting better. You know, actually, it did it did make me think of a question too, Haley. Um, you know, especially when you get to the higher levels. Was is there an age or is there a place that you go, okay, these are the skills that separate me? And it and I'm not, it could be hard skills or soft skills, like we talked about that earlier. But I also think that you know, a lot of focus is on, oh, what are my weaker skills and how do I make them better? Which is good. That's a good thing to do. But at some point, you know, if you're a goal scorer or you are great at separating people from the puck, you go, okay, these are my skills that separate. I want to get even better at those. How does that play? I think that's an important part of this because uh players should know that, hey, I'm I'm a tremendous skater. I want to get even better at that, right? When does that start? And and like how do you work on that even today? Or, you know, do you feel like you're at where you want to be?

SPEAKER_00 16:36

I'm not sure when it starts. I would say maybe like college level, I started focusing in on that stuff more because you're on the ice every day and you're with coaches every single day. Before it was like you're balancing high school, you know, schedule in life and you're not really on the ice as often working on skill work. I would say college that happened more. Um, and then obviously, like with pro starting in like 20, like even before that though, like when we were even in like our PWHPA and stuff, like he really had to focus on skills a lot because we didn't have team practices. So he got pretty sick of skills, but we did them a lot. And I would say uh for me, those skills are probably like wall play, um, I would agree, pump protection, uh things like that. But I think you can always get better at those, at those things and like physicality piece, you know, especially when you're alone doing skills, you miss the physicality piece a little bit.

SPEAKER_03 17:31

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 17:31

I was actually just training with uh earlier this week the junior black bears in the NAHL. And I was like, oh, I needed this little competition here. Like I needed this physicality and the, you know, the stick lifting and you know, being quick and puck protecting and things like that. So I wish I had a little more time because I I would love to have more of that, but I'll be getting that soon at USA camp. But um yeah, I think things like that are I would say my strong suits that I like to continue to work on.

SPEAKER_02 17:59

I I'll give a quick tease, Mike, that we are gonna do a day on the life for the uh 26-27 season, the first episode coming to you soon. Uh, for those of you who've been following that series, so we should know that. Go ahead go ahead, Mike.

SPEAKER_01 18:09

No, I was gonna say, I mean, yeah, I'm looking forward to that. Um, I uh I think I would I think I would say like for the older players I work with, that that's exactly kind of what I would tell them. I mean, you know, a lot of the a lot of times like after a certain time, you can't keep focusing on the skills that you're not good at. So sometimes you have to say, listen, I'm really good at this, and here's my expertise. You know, let's it let's make this the best piece of who you are. Because that's sometimes, again, when you get to a higher level, you're you're getting placed into places that specifically have a role to play. And if you're really great at that role, it's gonna elevate, you know, maybe the opportunity for you to play more than another player. So it's it's uh, you know, you're always trying to improve your game across the board and get better at all these skills, but at some point you have to say, like, listen, I just gotta there's not much I can do with this. This is not who I am, and let me just really get better at this.

SPEAKER_02 19:01

Yeah, look, I'll add on to this too. I remember I was about 16 when I remember people starting to say, Hey, you're a playmaker. We need a playmaker. And that's when I started to realize, okay, that's that's my skill that separates. Um, I think adversely, coaches, it's very important you do not tell that to a 10-year-old, hey, you're a playmaker. All right, because there's there at that age, you have to be developing all the skills, all right. And I every youth team I've coached, there's a kid with an amazing shot, just an amazing shot for their age, can't skate. And it's it's I don't want to say it's worthless, that's not fair, but you have to be able to skate in this game, right? So that's why I don't say to a 10-year-old, oh man, you've got a cannon, right? Like you're a shooter, because if you're not at the net, it's not gonna matter, right? Um, but I would say that for me, it was I remember people telling me, hey, you're a playmaker, and then how that affected my training was I I mean, what I heard what I heard initially with that was, oh, I can't score. That's what they're saying to me. But I I flipped that quickly. I I really harnessed in on my passing, got really good at that, but I also worked on my accuracy. I also worked on my shot, but just understanding those. It's a it's a good question, it's probably a topic for another full episode. Um, let's get keep going here. Uh, Ryan is a 15-year-old goaltender, okay? Um, and this is a very goaltender question, which I love. How do you stay mentally prepared and focused before and during a game? What steps or methods do you use for that prep? And I love that he asked during the game too. Um, because you know, pre-game prep is one thing when you're getting shot at, or you know, you're up, you're down, things are happening. That's a different type of mental um uh prep, right? So, Haley, there you go. You know, how do you stay mentally prepared and focused before and during a game?

SPEAKER_00 20:45

Yeah, that's great. I think goalie is definitely different, like you're on the whole game, right? Like um, there might be times where you can maybe reset during the game if it's in the offensive zone or things like that, but like other than that, it's definitely a different beast, I would say, than like a player and when they can reset because you're literally on the ice, like you're on, right? You're resetting, but it's like you got to focus if they're coming back at you. So I would definitely recommend listening to like maybe Aaron Frankel's podcast and different things like that when we had talked with her. Um, for myself, I would say I I just like to do the same routine on game days. I think that helps me get in the mode for game days. Um, but I also don't um for myself, I don't like to focus on it too much because I find that I get too tunnel visioned and then I get, you know, grip my stick too tight and things like that. So I don't overthink it on game days. Um once I get to the rink, I would say again, do the same routines. I always take my stick. Um that's about it. I like to play sewer bowl. Uh that's a great one to kind of get the competitive juices flowing, different things like that. I used to play spike ball a lot as well. That's another fun one, depending on like your numbers and who likes to do certain games. Um, and then from there, I do a little visualization in the locker room, I think, as I'm getting ready. But other than that, I like to stay loose. I like to talk to my teammates, you know, sing, listen to music, uh, whatever the team's listening to. Um, but I like to visualize myself like doing the things I'm really good at on the ice. And then during the game, um, I like to talk to my linemates a lot. Again, this is different for goalies. You don't have a line mate out there. Um, and some goalies like to lock in and not really talk to their teammates. So it's totally like you got to decide what works for you. Um, and you'll know, like you'll know what works for you. Cause it's like, let's say you're loose out there talking with your teammates and all of a sudden you're finding yourself not focused in on the game. Okay, then I'm a goalie who needs to like lock in and not talk to anyone. And that's fine. And you just gotta be clear about that. Um, so but for myself, I like to talk, especially talk about the game, like what we saw on the ice together, different things like that. I don't like to just stay in my own head. I find that again, I get too gripping my stick too tight. So I like to talk to my teammates and see what they're seeing, see what I'm seeing. Um, and you know, or compliment each other, like, hey, that was a great play. I like what you did there. I could hear you really well on the ice, keep talking to me, things like that.

SPEAKER_02 23:12

Yeah, Haley, you know, you're bringing up a great point. And I'm gonna say too, that it like you said, it looks different for everybody, right? Um, I think one piece of advice I always have when it comes to staying prepared during the game is, you know, your level of intensity, how intense I think you feel like you need to be as a player is up to you. What what I do tell players is try not to get lost in your mind, right? Don't get hijacked by emotions to the point of you're not really at the game anymore. You're up in your head fighting yourself. Like that's not where you want to be, uh, because the answers are not going to be there. The answers are about staying present and being on the ice. And I'll I'll say to Ryan too um, Ryan, if you head over, talk to all goaltenders, head over to our kidsplayhockey.com. Um, you can search all of our our kids play goalie episodes too. We've had some great people on there. Um uh Pete Fry, who is part of Censorina now, NHL goaltending coach, is on there. If you head over to again our kidsplayhockey comfortable deals, you can see what Sensorina has going on there. Um, but Pete Fry, Haley, to your point, um, one of his trainings is you're in net and it's a progression drill, and he's in your headset saying you are a wall in the net. You will, you will, you are a great goaltender. It's just positive reinforcement. And he talks about how he does this with goaltenders of just you gotta train your mind to give yourself these messages, right? Like nothing gets by me in the net. Uh, and that might not be an exact one he says, but uh that was a great episode too, just trying to reference that. So, Ryan, check those out. Great question. Um, all right, this next one, uh Mindy and Alyssa. So I happen to know this, these people. This is a mom and a daughter. Um, and the question is how do you prepare yourself mentally to come back from an injury? And Haley, I'll set this up for you a little bit. I know that that Alyssa is out for a couple months now with an injury, so very timely that she's asking that question. But how do you prepare yourself mentally to come back from an injury?

SPEAKER_00 25:09

I think while you're in your recovery process, and I think you can do a lot of visualization. I think that's something you can visualize yourself healing, and then you can also visualize yourself on the ice with your teammates, how you're gonna be playing out there. Uh, not sure the nature of the injury, but there's always things you can kind of do depending on what part is injured.

SPEAKER_02 25:33

There's little things you can this one's a lower body injury, I can tell you that.

SPEAKER_00 25:36

Yeah, okay. Maybe we can do shooting, maybe we can do stick handling, you know, maybe there's different things you can kind of um make shift to work on your game that doesn't involve the part of your body that's injured. And I think it's getting creative in that sense, and it could lead to you developing a skill you never thought you would be able to. So I think that could be a cool way to kind of prepare yourself to get back, you know, on the ice with your teammates and stuff, and then you know, encouraging you to reach out to your teammates, you know, see what they're up to, keep in touch, keep connected. I think that's huge just for the mental side of it, uh, to keep yourself kind of engaged with the team as much as you can. And hopefully your teammates are also reaching out to you. But that's a that's a big one I recommend as well. But I think the visualization piece could be a fun one to add where you're like, you know, five minutes before bed, maybe you're just like sitting there thinking about, oh my gosh, I can't wait to do this on the ice and like seeing yourself skating and seeing yourself scoring and you know, whatever it might be.

SPEAKER_02 26:35

Yeah, it's a great answer. I can tell you, um, and again, I know Alyssa, she's one of my players. Um, she's on the bench every practice. Oh, she's coming every game. Uh, and we make sure that everybody gives her a little you know high five on the way off the ice because it's hard to do that. It's hard to, it's hard to watch. It's also fun to be there, but it's hard to watch when you want to be out there. So uh again, another one of those, you're asking the question. That's like 50% of the battle right there. Um, and I'll say real quick, you know, uh quick story. I missed my whole senior high school, six months out with a major injury. Um, and Heli, to your point, um, I didn't just sit around, right? I was it was a shoulder injury, shooting pucked with one hand in my garage when when I was you know able to, right? I didn't do it the day after surgery. Um, but I can tell you, I came back from that injury better as I was a better player when I came back than before it happened. Um, and again, a lot of support from family and friends, but we did the work, right? And and um sometimes those setbacks can can vault you forward. Um, but you know, adversity is the greatest teacher. You can go with that. Mike, anything to add to that one? That's it's just a great question from uh from Alyssa there.

SPEAKER_01 27:42

Yeah, no, I like the fact of you know, the the piece of you know, just be active as a good teammate and and hopefully your teammates are are good teammates back to you. And you know, find different ways to be active on the team. Whether it's you know, nowadays you could you could help with video, you could help with statistics, you could help with you know individual player uh questions, it's depending on where she's at in her as her role of the team. You know, I mean there's there's so many, you know, kids love talking to other kids, and and and I think you know, having the opportunity, uh, although it's not something she chose to want, uh, to have the ability to sit there and say, hey, listen, you know, if you ever want to talk about your game, I can talk with you about your game. Like I'm watching it, like I'm I'm dying to play. And sometimes that emotional piece too is great for another athlete, is to hear, like, oh, I think I have it so lucky. This she's not even playing, and she's passionate about the team. Right, you know, so I think there's uh there's good ways that you could really be involved. And I and I think that ultimately, like you said, grow, find a way to grow uh from the experience. Um, and and you'll be a better person uh, you know, when you come out of it.

SPEAKER_02 28:42

Yeah, and I'm I'm gonna add this too because this question did come from the mother and the daughter, like the parent and the daughter. So we're we're talking directly to Alyssa here. What would we say to Mindy uh too? You know, her daughter's out now. Now let's put yourself in Mindy's position here, right? She's driving her daughter to practice to not be on the ice, she's driving her to games to not play. It's already hard enough when you are playing, right? Now it's like, uh, do we we really have to be there today? What's what's uh and just so it because I know Minnie, she's gonna be there, she's she's diehard. But what do we say to parents that have young kids going through injury? And I do want to set this up. Um, when I'm injured, it's one thing, like I'm living that. I'm a parent now, right? Mike, you're a parent. Like, like our kids being injured is I mean, you it's terrifying. You don't want your kids to ever be hurt, especially seriously hurt. The thought of um, you know, a young kid, and I mean 18 down having a surgery, you know, now that I'm the age I'm at now, it's like, oh man, like I see that with when I was 17 and I had that surgery, I was like, I'll be back in no time. Now that I've had a shoulder replacement at 42, I'm like, ah, did was not thinking about that. Uh, we'll say 20 years ago, even though it was a lot more than that. What do we say to the parents of a child who's injured?

SPEAKER_01 29:58

You know, I'll just step in because this has happened to me many times. I I and it might not be the greatest take in the world, but don't I don't know. I'm I'm on the side of listen, if you're hurt, you don't have to be at everything, you don't have to travel an hour and a half to a game you're not gonna play in. There's so many like take the opportunity to actually catch up on other things. If you're the mother of this child, say, oh my God, like I have like I do have some free free time here. I have some other time to do other things. And like what Hellie was saying, if you've make, you know, that time for her, although it might feel good like that you're doing it, the time she spent driving to an away game, an hour and a half, maybe she could have spent on doing something that doesn't affect her injury. Maybe she could have spent time on, you know, I could listen, you could get on live barn and watch the game if you really wanted to. You don't, you you know, and as a coach, sometimes it's almost like, oh, you know, like I got this player now sitting on the bench with her helmet on and the mom's in the stands and she's not playing. And it's just at the youth level, it's it's if you're a college or pro and you're sitting up in the press box, it's a whole different thing.

SPEAKER_02 31:02

Yeah, we don't have a press box.

SPEAKER_01 31:04

You're all part of the team. You know, you're all part of the team. At the youth level, I don't know. I'm just like like you can't just unplug from the team and say, hey, see in six months. But there's there's certainly, I think everyone understands and would hopefully would encourage that. Listen, you don't have to come to everything, and there's certain team events that we might have. Like I know you do a lot of like team building and and like dinners and things like that. That, yes, go to those kinds of things, be a part of the team. Don't don't extract yourself totally. But you don't have to, you know, I mean, I see I used to see kids show up, you know, they'd show up the hour before the game, you know, for the war. So he just sat there looking, like, okay, I'm looking. Like you don't need you don't need to do all that, I don't think.

SPEAKER_02 31:40

Well, here's what I would say too. Like a caveat on that. If your kid wants to do that, get a carpool, man. Like, like take the day off when the kid goes to the city.

SPEAKER_01 31:49

Nobody has to tie her skates, just go. Yeah, just go.

SPEAKER_02 31:52

No, I I think it's fair, and I think that the each family's got to approach that differently. Mike, I I would agree with you too. Like, if you're traveling crazy hours, uh, I don't think anyone's gonna look at that injured player and be like, why aren't you here? Why did she not show up?

SPEAKER_01 32:04

I can't believe she's not here. Can't believe it.

SPEAKER_02 32:06

Yeah, I was gonna play her.

SPEAKER_01 32:08

If anybody go, oh my god, she's so lucky, she has to come to this game.

SPEAKER_02 32:11

Yeah, and then yeah, that's that's probably what would happen. And then from the press box little scenario gave, like, that's the difference between between being paid to be there and paying to be there. Right. Two different things. Um, all right, gang, listen, I'm looking at the time and I'm looking at how many questions we have left. So, what we're gonna do is end this as a part one because Haley is so generous with her time, and I'm going to dive back in with a part two with her on these questions in the future, uh, so we can get them all in. But uh, Haley, I'm gonna say this always a pleasure, great answers, and I'm gonna say this is just part one of QA with Haley Skimora. All right, gang. Thank you for being here. And uh stay tuned to Our Girls Play Hockey because we're gonna have a partoon soon, a uh day in the life soon, and a lot of other stuff coming from this podcast. So we'll see you on the next episode, everybody. For Haley and Mike, I'm Lee. Have a good day. We hope you enjoyed this edition of Our Kids Play Hockey. Make sure to like and subscribe right now if you found value wherever you're listening, whether it's a podcast network, a social media network, or our website, ourkidsplayhockey.com. Also, make sure to check out our children's book, When Hockey Stops, at WhenHockeystops.com. It's a book that helps children deal with adversity in the game and in life. We're very proud of it. But thanks so much for listening to this edition of Our Kids Play Hockey, and we'll see you on the next episode.