Jan. 13, 2024

Our Kid Made It To The NHL with Tom & Ellen Atkinson

In this episode of Our Kids Play Hockey, we're joined by Tom and Ellen Atkinson, the parents of NHL star Cam Atkinson and four brothers who all played youth hockey. Their journey is a compelling tale of love, sacrifice, and the pursuit of a family dream, offering a unique window into the life of a dedicated hockey family.

The Atkinson’s discuss the complexities of managing multiple hockey schedules and how they fostered a sense of unity that helped their sons transition from local ponds to the professional rinks. This episode highlights the importance of balancing a child’s passion for hockey with their overall growth and development. Key to this discussion is Cam's experience with burnout, emphasizing the need for young athletes to have diverse interests.

We also dive into the impact of mentors in young athletes' lives, with a particular focus on the positive influence of Mike Backman on Cam’s career. Additionally, the Atkinson’s speak on the crucial role of community support in the development of young players.

This conversation goes deep into the effects of instilling resilience, building character, and creating a love for the game that surpasses the competitive aspect. We wrap up with heartfelt stories that underscore the importance of making hockey fun and the evolution of coaching that equally values character development and skill training.

Tune in to hear the Atkinson family's inspiring story of raising an NHLer. It's an episode that not only sheds light on the finer aspects of hockey but also celebrates the extraordinary people who nurture this sport and make it a source of joy and lifelong memories.

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00:51 - Parents' Sacrifices and NHL Journeys

10:04 - Balancing Sports Pressure and Personal Development

24:03 - Developing Well-Rounded Hockey Players

33:07 - Coaches' Impact on Player Development

39:31 - The Importance of Making Hockey Fun

48:05 - Adversity and Training in Becoming Great

52:36 - Balancing Life and Hockey Importance

01:06:03 - Cam's Hockey Journey and Family Values

WEBVTT

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00:02:00.439 --> 00:02:07.650
Hello hockey friends and families around the world and welcome to another edition of Our Kids Playhockey, now powered by NHL Sensorina.

00:02:07.650 --> 00:02:16.306
I'm Leo Elias and I'm joined as always by my favorite line mates, mike Benelli and Kristi Kiasciano Burns, and today we are joined by the parents of an NHL player.

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Many of you know Cam Atkinson, who currently plays for the Philadelphia Flyers, but what you may not know about Tom and Ellen Atkinson is that they are the parents of five boys, all who have played hockey.

00:02:28.367 --> 00:02:33.743
Tom and Ellen met in Vancouver before moving to the east coast where Ellen is from, where they started their family.

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Ellen is the owner of Consigned Designs, which she has owned for 18 years, and Tom runs finance operations for a private hedge fund in Manhattan.

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And while we all know, as parents, we have our quote unquote real jobs.

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Hockey runs in the blood for this family.

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For all you listeners who have been asking us for another episode with parents who have successfully navigated the road to the NHL, this one's for you, tom Ellen, it's a pleasure to have you here today.

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Welcome to Our Kids Playhockey Good morning Good morning.

00:03:02.185 --> 00:03:02.907
Thanks for being here.

00:03:02.907 --> 00:03:04.526
You know I want to start with this question.

00:03:04.526 --> 00:03:13.028
We speak a lot on this show about the values of youth hockey, but I know that all of us who are parents in the game wonder what does it really take?

00:03:13.028 --> 00:03:21.447
What kind of sacrifices and determination from both the player and the parents does it take to have a child get all the way to the NHL?

00:03:21.447 --> 00:03:26.331
I know at one point in your lives you had kids on four teams at once.

00:03:26.331 --> 00:03:32.007
So why don't you tell us a little bit about the hockey journey as parents and the five boys that you have raised successfully?

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I'll put it that way Go ahead Ellen.

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I know you can't wait.

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It was all a blur, let me tell you, but it took a team, and Tom had to be a huge part of all this, because four kids at one time were on a team.

00:03:56.093 --> 00:04:09.604
We were so lucky that we belonged to a small little private skating club that backed the games up on the weekends.

00:04:09.604 --> 00:04:15.921
The mites, squirts, peewees, bantams, one played right after the other.

00:04:15.921 --> 00:04:30.910
So we were literally on the road when they were very small, watching four games at the least amount, four games a day every Saturday and then every Sunday back to back.

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We also had the help of others that if we had to go in two different directions, they would help us too.

00:04:44.480 --> 00:04:59.490
But quite honestly, tom, when they were young, we were together back to back at each arena throughout Connecticut, mostly watching games, and I mean Tom was a coach, usually of one or both.

00:04:59.490 --> 00:05:03.170
I mean, every other year our Cam and Tommy played together.

00:05:03.170 --> 00:05:09.232
So that was a blessing, because then it was down to three back to back games each day.

00:05:09.232 --> 00:05:16.132
But yeah, it was crazy.

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That was our weekend.

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Every weekend we were together as a family.

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Everyone came with us, all the boys, and that's what our life consisted of.

00:05:29.833 --> 00:05:32.459
Right, crazy, let's throw some in.

00:05:32.459 --> 00:05:43.709
Yeah, throw some advice out there for parents who are going through the same thing right now and feeling pretty chaotic in their lives and it's kind of hard to see the bigger picture when you're in it in the moment.

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Yeah, you really both.

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You have to, as a family, enjoy it.

00:05:49.172 --> 00:06:09.040
When we first moved here from Vancouver, we had no children and I was asked the coach at Greenwich High School of our city team, which I think I did for 11 years and Ellen would come to all the games and as the kids were smaller they would come to the games with us as well On Sundays.

00:06:09.040 --> 00:06:20.733
I was always taking them as little kids to the ice rink and skating with them, and then, as they started to develop, then I had to branch away from that and coach them individually.

00:06:20.733 --> 00:06:27.473
But logistically Ellen could be going in one direction and I could be going in another.

00:06:27.680 --> 00:06:47.107
We'd go up to Lake Placid and fortunately I did the Peewees and, I think, the squirts one year because the coach wasn't there and they were able to schedule me like I was getting off one rink to another rink and at one point this is kind of comical we were playing Chris Atkinson.

00:06:47.107 --> 00:06:58.422
I'm not sure if you know them from New Jersey there was two Atkinsons and we had two Atkinsons and those two were very good and our two were very good and it was Atkinson.

00:06:58.422 --> 00:07:00.747
From Atkinson to Atkinson to Atkinson.

00:07:00.807 --> 00:07:01.468
It was great.

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But those are the experiences that we would go to these tournaments and be able to experience the community, especially Lake Placid when I coached the Junior Rangers Peewee Major team for two years for the NHL division.

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So we were able to get a lot of really good life experiences.

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The kids would get billeted out in some situations but the team effort from us and Ellen and myself being able to buy into it and really want I mean you got to have both parents that want to do it.

00:07:42.428 --> 00:07:52.733
Fortunately, or maybe unfortunately, we did not have a girl, so not sure she'd be playing hockey or figure skating or doing something different.

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So we were all kind of in the same sport arena, which was good.

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You know it's funny.

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You guys mentioned Mike and I because we're all nodding our heads.

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For those of you listening to this and for the parents listening, we understand the divide and conquer mentality that it takes, especially when you have multiple kids in the game.

00:08:10.206 --> 00:08:11.946
And this starts with just two kids, right.

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When you have five kids, it gets crazy.

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The other quote we've spawned on this show that I think our audience really resonates with is that you're not crazy, it's the hockey world that's crazy.

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The hockey parents not the coaches, the hockey parents are crazy.

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They can be crazy.

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I wanted to move on to this before we dive into kind of Cam's journey into the league, because you guys are proud parents and it's very obvious of all your children and one of the aspects of your kids development that I definitely wanted to talk about was the awareness of burnout and mental health.

00:08:48.888 --> 00:08:57.548
We told us, actually, that Cam at one point was being invited to a USA hockey camp, which is a really prestigious thing, but it was clear that it needed a break.

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I was wondering if you could share that story and any others that you have about the importance of taking breaks and being mentally fit.

00:09:05.528 --> 00:09:11.272
That's an interesting story because it turned around in a way he loved La Crosse.

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He was very good at La Crosse as well.

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He also liked vacations.

00:09:17.144 --> 00:09:18.552
Yeah, he did like vacations.

00:09:18.552 --> 00:09:19.929
He liked, that's correct.

00:09:19.929 --> 00:09:31.596
The US Development Camp wanted Cam to go play for Team USA, which he did numerous times, but this was more of him getting an opportunity for exposure.

00:09:31.596 --> 00:09:35.134
He said that he didn't want to go.

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He said I need a break.

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We said that's fine.

00:09:39.832 --> 00:09:47.936
We took a break and he got boycotted a little bit, I'm sorry, what age are you talking about?

00:09:47.965 --> 00:09:49.850
I'm just trying to figure out his age.

00:09:52.846 --> 00:09:55.495
He might have been 10 years, 11, maybe 12.

00:09:55.544 --> 00:09:56.128
That young Wow.

00:09:57.144 --> 00:09:58.109
Yeah, it was pretty young.

00:09:58.650 --> 00:09:59.232
Maybe 13.

00:09:59.232 --> 00:10:05.773
He might have been a little older than that I should have asked him but he was definitely under 15.

00:10:06.193 --> 00:10:07.576
Okay, yeah.

00:10:08.217 --> 00:10:29.013
Yeah, and they were very, very disappointed, which came around in a year after that, but it turned out to be very good because Team USA came to meet with me and apologized for what it transpired, because he totally was like off the radar and he was good enough to be on that radar.

00:10:29.764 --> 00:10:30.066
Yeah.

00:10:30.066 --> 00:10:31.331
So I think that's two things right.

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Number one is the old adage if you're good enough, they'll find you right.

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If you're good enough and obviously you as a family have to read that and say, well, if we burn them out and he's not helping Team USA, he's not helping himself as an individual and he's not helping his teammates.

00:10:47.671 --> 00:10:49.993
You know we talk about this a lot on the show.

00:10:49.993 --> 00:10:51.731
Is that refreshing piece?

00:10:51.731 --> 00:10:53.631
I mean, one of the things I loved about the Atkinson family.

00:10:53.631 --> 00:10:58.307
I coached at Immaculate High School for 11, 12 years so we played against Greenwich a lot and I remember the boy.

00:10:58.307 --> 00:10:59.513
I'm like Jesus.

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Is there any back into?

00:11:00.908 --> 00:11:01.750
Not on a team here?

00:11:02.172 --> 00:11:02.894
We got a lot of that.

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There's more than one of them, so keep your head up.

00:11:06.072 --> 00:11:07.610
It's a broadcaster's nightmare.

00:11:07.610 --> 00:11:08.807
It just wasn't fair.

00:11:08.807 --> 00:11:09.370
It wasn't fair.

00:11:10.506 --> 00:11:30.813
But I think it's like, but just to watch his journey, you know, because we're in, I mean, if the audience you know doesn't know, you know you're in the world of patcher, ready and quick and like there's like all these kids that, and when you listen to the stories of, like the New Canaan Winter Clubs and the Greenwich Clubs and the Dorothy Hamill rinks, the, it was intense, I get it.

00:11:30.865 --> 00:11:56.986
You guys played a very intense hockey schedule but the free play and the opportunity just to be the big fish in a small pond and having the life balance of vacations and other sports lacrosse and baseball and soccer, like I just think that era in that time, with all these kids that have really developed, you know it was really really prevalent and obviously maybe you guys could speak to that a little bit about.

00:11:56.986 --> 00:12:06.692
You know the, not the, not even the pressure, but the, the, the non-pressure, saying hey, ken wants to play lacrosse this spring and the kids want to do these other sports.

00:12:06.692 --> 00:12:13.292
You know, do you think that was just because of the community you were in or is it because he was so good at hockey?

00:12:13.292 --> 00:12:17.272
Everybody's like, well, listen, let's back off this kid a little bit and let him do whatever he wants to do.

00:12:17.705 --> 00:12:28.832
Right, or maybe you saw some signs too, that we're showing that say ooh, you know, maybe we ought to step back and just let them be a little freer and not so intense with hockey.

00:12:29.433 --> 00:12:37.734
It was all him, I mean, he requested it and we honored it, or just accepted it, and and there was pressure.

00:12:37.734 --> 00:12:40.892
By the way there was pressure from coaches.

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I mean in some cases the lacrosse coach said it's us or hockey, this particular one.

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We didn't have a ton of money when the kids were little and our only vacation was in August.

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We would go to Ocean City, maryland, with my entire family and it meant so much to all the boys and Cam was going to miss it that summer because of this tournament and he's like I don't want to miss my one and only vacation.

00:13:11.995 --> 00:13:18.813
So, but going back to the pressure, there was a little bit of pressure for the kids.

00:13:18.813 --> 00:13:22.412
I used to fight it all the time.

00:13:22.412 --> 00:13:28.731
I mean, coaches were like we have practice on Halloween night, you are not going trick or treating.

00:13:28.731 --> 00:13:32.230
And I'm like yes, they are, they are going trick or treating?

00:13:32.250 --> 00:13:32.591
No, we did.

00:13:32.591 --> 00:13:35.293
We moved our practices to earlier remember.

00:13:36.128 --> 00:13:36.951
We would go yeah.

00:13:37.384 --> 00:13:42.874
Well, I think that's, I think that's my point Now is that is that you know, that's you as the parent, that's your job.

00:13:42.974 --> 00:13:43.294
Yeah.

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Your job is to say whoa, whoa, whoa, I'm the consumer, these are my children, like I get it.

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And then I was that coach too.

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I was like, listen, you got to be here and you got to be at practice.

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And we talk on this episode or on this show a lot about before kids and after kids.

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And when I was a 23 year old high school coach, I'm like there was no other thing going on in the world.

00:14:03.664 --> 00:14:05.873
But my team, like I'm like what do you mean?

00:14:05.873 --> 00:14:09.712
I can't tell you we have practice at two o'clock in the afternoon, that we have practice night at seven.

00:14:09.712 --> 00:14:26.428
I can't just throw that at you, you know, because people are just navigating the world and I think when you have kids and obviously you guys went through it as a, you know Tom is a coach without kids, and also now you have kids in the system you know it really becomes a, you know, an eye-opening experience to say, oh geez.

00:14:26.428 --> 00:14:27.894
You know I do have to give them Halloween.

00:14:27.894 --> 00:14:29.308
I do have to give them prom.

00:14:29.308 --> 00:14:32.993
You know the dance nights, I do have to give them the family vacations.

00:14:33.065 --> 00:14:42.389
Now, not every single weekend, you know, for 26 weeks but, you have to have that balance or we just lose these kids, we lose these great athletes.

00:14:43.065 --> 00:14:45.212
But you got to admit that that's hard to do.

00:14:45.212 --> 00:14:53.032
There's a lot of pressure on parents that well, if your kid doesn't make it Halloween night, he's not going to play the next game.

00:14:53.032 --> 00:14:56.355
Or if he doesn't pick lacrosse over hockey, that's it.

00:14:56.355 --> 00:14:58.673
His lacrosse career is done.

00:14:58.673 --> 00:15:04.129
There's a lot of pressure on parents to cave and to give it to that.

00:15:04.625 --> 00:15:25.934
And a lot of parents absolutely do, but the parents that understand or listen to their children, which we need to do really changes that decision, which I believe it may have taken us time taken me more time than you because you're always like let everybody play.

00:15:25.934 --> 00:15:28.572
No one wants to play for you and sit on the bench.

00:15:28.572 --> 00:15:30.269
It's got to be fun.

00:15:30.269 --> 00:15:38.691
And you know, you bring up the skating club, you bring up, you know, the winter club, all those I had all those guys on the team.

00:15:38.691 --> 00:15:43.472
I had Ben Smith, I had Max Patsch ready, I had Cam, johnny Quick.

00:15:44.205 --> 00:15:50.011
So I show up to a tournament and they're all in prep school and Mike, you'll love this story.

00:15:50.011 --> 00:16:01.309
So I show up and we go up in some man's plane that was able to get certain kids and you know what schools are like prep schools You're not getting out on Friday.

00:16:01.309 --> 00:16:07.616
Fortunately, john Gardner understood and allowed us to go.

00:16:07.616 --> 00:16:10.332
We went up with five kids and Johnny Quick.

00:16:10.332 --> 00:16:14.730
We show up and the ref comes over, goes dude, you can't play with five kids.

00:16:14.730 --> 00:16:16.371
I go, can I play?

00:16:16.371 --> 00:16:17.850
He goes yes, but do you want to?

00:16:17.850 --> 00:16:19.730
I go watch Johnny Quick and net.

00:16:19.730 --> 00:16:21.870
We beat these guys.

00:16:21.870 --> 00:16:28.495
I had John Backman, cam, tommy, and literally it was so much fun.

00:16:28.495 --> 00:16:29.648
The ref comes over and goes.

00:16:29.648 --> 00:16:31.374
I've never seen anything like this.

00:16:31.374 --> 00:16:52.332
But Cam fortunately got to play with some really elite friends and he's still really good friends with, like you know, patcher ready patches from New Canaan, warring, greenwich, downing's there, ben Smith, ellie, who was Nick, nick Benino, I mean all these guys.

00:16:52.885 --> 00:16:53.811
Yeah, all the so funny.

00:16:53.811 --> 00:16:54.768
My son plays a lot of.

00:16:54.768 --> 00:16:56.794
My son plays a lot like NHL 24.

00:16:56.794 --> 00:17:00.956
And he has a team of all Fairfield County players and they beat everyone.

00:17:00.956 --> 00:17:07.070
They beat, everyone they beat the day when they win the Stanley Cup every year, just just with Fairfield.

00:17:07.090 --> 00:17:07.211
County.

00:17:07.211 --> 00:17:10.034
I think it's five players on the ice.

00:17:12.240 --> 00:17:13.731
Oh, and that's awesome, and you know that.

00:17:13.731 --> 00:17:16.669
I don't know, maybe that says less about you as a coach, but I think it's.

00:17:16.669 --> 00:17:20.105
I'm a good recruiter.

00:17:20.224 --> 00:17:21.951
What hell are you going to go down about it?

00:17:21.951 --> 00:17:23.051
But I think, but again.

00:17:23.071 --> 00:17:37.910
Those are like when I look at these players and I'm in a good situation because I actually know these guys right and I watch like dude that's the Snapple Express years and all these other times and the comforts and the people I work with Like these for the most part.

00:17:37.950 --> 00:17:48.684
Like these are really well balanced you know, energetic, positive families and kids Like, like just again, does it help that their players were elite athletes?

00:17:48.684 --> 00:17:53.894
Probably only because there was a lot less pressure than than the other parent.

00:17:53.894 --> 00:17:55.085
That's push, push, push, push, push.

00:17:55.085 --> 00:17:57.823
You're like, listen, you could take a day off, you're, you're, you're.

00:17:57.823 --> 00:18:00.386
The coach is going to kind of give you a little leeway.

00:18:00.386 --> 00:18:08.395
But to your point, like when these come, when these prep school kids like they don't care, they don't care how much money you have, they're all.

00:18:08.395 --> 00:18:09.525
They all are in the same boat.

00:18:09.525 --> 00:18:11.491
That's the whole idea going to these institutions.

00:18:11.491 --> 00:18:25.484
But I see you guys, but I think finding that balance and finding the way to put kids together, I don't know, I just love that, the way those kids inspired each other and I mean, listen, I would have loved to see those practices because they must have beat the hell out of each other.

00:18:25.484 --> 00:18:27.973
I mean, you know, those guys really compete.

00:18:28.885 --> 00:18:30.508
Yeah, yeah, we had.

00:18:30.508 --> 00:18:31.551
We had a lot of fun with it.

00:18:31.551 --> 00:18:41.545
There was and Cam got to play, especially when I did, because, remember, the Peewees changed the birth year when I was coaching the junior Rangers team.

00:18:41.545 --> 00:18:56.451
So Cam went up with the 88s and then it's over to the 90s and I remember showing up there with a bunch of kids from Buffalo because they couldn't play because the Buffalo and the Hartford Whalers were having an issue over territory.

00:18:56.965 --> 00:19:02.354
So, believe it or not, I had Patrick Kane on the team but his mother, his grandmother, got very sick.

00:19:02.354 --> 00:19:10.146
So I had all those Buffalo kids and we showed up and played Detroit Little Caesars, cam's, this big, these guys.

00:19:10.146 --> 00:19:12.790
I had the Bennett brothers, I had all these monsters.

00:19:12.790 --> 00:19:15.875
It got into a huge brawl because I didn't realize.

00:19:15.875 --> 00:19:22.634
Buffalo and Detroit Little Caesars hated each other, and Cam's like I'm not going on the ice.

00:19:22.634 --> 00:19:30.404
So I had these 89 birth years with these big 88 kids and we ended up winning the tournament on the other side of it.

00:19:30.404 --> 00:19:35.362
So there were great experiences and it was always fun.

00:19:35.362 --> 00:19:46.625
We always seemed to be going out for dinners or go-karts or going and playing laser tag or doing something that you know, whether you're an Ottawa or whatever tournament.

00:19:46.625 --> 00:19:48.333
We always made fun of it.

00:19:48.968 --> 00:20:16.365
But just going back to burnout, I mean when we were at the skating club for many, many years and it, when I look back, it was really, really special, because when we moved the boys to Snapple, which is the team that you just referred to, mike one of my sons burnt out so fast and I'm imagining that's what's going on right now.

00:20:16.365 --> 00:20:22.805
I don't know, but I'm thinking most of our teams were in the Greenwich skating club.

00:20:22.805 --> 00:20:28.484
They were local or they were easy to get to within an hour or an hour and 15 minutes.

00:20:28.484 --> 00:20:41.317
When we moved to Snapple, all of my kids were in different directions and they were going to Philly, they were going to New Jersey, connecticut, they were going all over that.

00:20:41.357 --> 00:20:47.084
One of my kids said I'm done, I am not sitting in a car One more Friday afternoon.

00:20:47.084 --> 00:20:54.212
One more Friday night in traffic to get to a game for a weekend and come home on like I'm done.

00:20:54.212 --> 00:21:01.213
I don't know how Cam and Tommy continued, but that ruined us.

00:21:01.213 --> 00:21:05.999
So I have a feeling a lot of youth hockey now is like that.

00:21:05.999 --> 00:21:08.664
They're not staying within Connecticut or New York.

00:21:08.724 --> 00:21:10.176
Well, they're all the All-Star team.

00:21:10.176 --> 00:21:11.023
They're all All-Star teams.

00:21:11.023 --> 00:21:14.711
I just drove 10 hours from Pittsburgh last night, so I mean, I think, I think it's a nice job.

00:21:16.929 --> 00:21:18.775
I don't think we could have done that, Tom.

00:21:19.325 --> 00:21:20.249
I mean we were different.

00:21:20.249 --> 00:21:23.979
We did do it, al for a while Not with the skating club.

00:21:23.979 --> 00:21:25.771
No, no, not with the skating club.

00:21:25.825 --> 00:21:35.479
But I think I think that's the other to your point it's and we talk about this a lot here with parents is that that rush to that doesn't have to happen at nine and 10 and 11 years old.

00:21:35.525 --> 00:21:35.826
Right.

00:21:36.086 --> 00:21:45.076
That doesn't have to happen, like you could find now, like you could find the same crappy 10 year olds to play right down the street in Darien.

00:21:45.076 --> 00:21:50.285
Then you can't in, you know Westchester, pa and I think, or Ontario or Toronto.

00:21:50.285 --> 00:21:57.125
Yes, I think it becomes this churning money business and we talk about the business piece of all the time.

00:21:57.125 --> 00:21:59.554
I know, I know we want to get the camp's career, but he's on the back.

00:22:00.775 --> 00:22:01.583
You know this is great.

00:22:01.583 --> 00:22:03.727
No, the audience is going to hold on, Don't worry.

00:22:03.747 --> 00:22:17.305
But I think this is like one of these things where you, as parents, right now going through that and saying, but she's, I'm, if I was in 2024, could I have done this with four kids and you know, could we have split, you know, all these families up.

00:22:17.305 --> 00:22:34.713
And we see it all the time, and I call it like the cams of today are just making it through the gauntlet, like they're just like, look at you, you got one of four Right, and it's like, and I'm sure they're all tremendous athletes, yeah, and good at everything they do.

00:22:34.713 --> 00:22:36.086
It's like who?

00:22:36.086 --> 00:22:36.828
But who can?

00:22:36.828 --> 00:22:42.358
Who can have the luck to get through the gauntlet and then make it through?

00:22:42.358 --> 00:22:50.153
And then it does become I mean, it's the funniest thing is like when you, when it gets to Boston College, right, it's easier like when you get the most fun ever.

00:22:50.627 --> 00:22:51.951
Boston College Right.

00:22:51.951 --> 00:22:54.262
But, all of a sudden it becomes?

00:22:54.442 --> 00:22:56.867
it becomes back to the Greenwich skating club.

00:22:56.867 --> 00:23:05.546
Yes play on every day, intense, fun, atmosphere, a More sane schedule.

00:23:05.546 --> 00:23:18.220
But it's funny how everything we do to get our kids to Boston College is Counter-intuitive to development at nine and ten and eleven years old and and we just look at me, say, well, this kid made it, yeah, but thousands didn't, thousands of failed.

00:23:19.063 --> 00:23:22.858
My Mike, you're saying that the key to getting a kid in the NHL is just to have more kids.

00:23:22.960 --> 00:23:26.686
Right, that's what it sounds like yeah, you gotta play the percentages.

00:23:27.220 --> 00:23:28.747
27 kids that all play.

00:23:28.747 --> 00:23:29.611
There's a good chance.

00:23:29.611 --> 00:23:30.394
You know, actually there's.

00:23:30.394 --> 00:23:32.603
No, there's still a low chance and nothing We'll make it.

00:23:32.623 --> 00:23:33.164
You know what?

00:23:33.164 --> 00:23:34.930
Mike has 27 kids.

00:23:34.930 --> 00:23:36.824
Sometimes I feel like it.

00:23:38.000 --> 00:23:38.221
Kids.

00:23:38.221 --> 00:23:41.531
As a coach, you know a couple observations here and notice.

00:23:41.531 --> 00:23:54.009
You know, last year I saw I won't say the tournament name, they and they have since changed this, but they had some elite teams travel to five different destinations around the country to play the same opponents and that was I was gonna bring that up.

00:23:54.330 --> 00:24:12.105
Yeah, it's insanity to me and, and you know, again, to the credit to that, to that tournament, they have changed it now, okay, but it's, you know, and it was kind of touted as exposure and I'm like, okay, if this was 1985 where it was no internet, maybe, but you know that we don't need that today.

00:24:12.105 --> 00:24:30.598
And it sounds like to me just listening to what both of you are saying, is that you were able to put an equal amount of effort into building them, not just as hockey players but as Right, and it's so important that we develop good people, because that's who become good hockey players, and if they don't become NHL players, that's okay too.

00:24:30.598 --> 00:24:55.971
I think one of you alluded before about the business nature of youth hockey and I think what's happened is that there's a huge bubble now around the business aspect and the elite aspect and the all-star aspect that we've forgotten about developing these young, young kids as kids, and I think that especially I want to, I want to impress this on our audience and please tell me if you disagree you spent the time on building them as people as much as the hockey player, if not more.

00:24:55.971 --> 00:25:00.248
The fact that you Again, I wanted to say this earlier and this is so cool.

00:25:00.409 --> 00:25:01.813
This is why I brought up the USA hockey thing.

00:25:01.813 --> 00:25:13.872
We say all the time on this show there really is not one tournament or one game or one event that's gonna make or break your career, right, that there are breakout events where your kid may get there and show up and it's like wow.

00:25:13.872 --> 00:25:18.923
But the truth is, if your kid is great enough, if your kid is motivated enough, it's not base.

00:25:18.923 --> 00:25:28.279
You can't base it on one thing and and I also love I wanted to bring the like this too, tom, that you said this the USA hockey came to you and and basically you know, made amends.

00:25:28.279 --> 00:25:30.645
I think that's worth mentioning again as well.

00:25:30.645 --> 00:25:40.453
Right, because, because at the time cam was coming up, I'd say that was the dawn of the mental health kind of time period of like oh, maybe it was a, maybe this is important time period.

00:25:40.881 --> 00:25:41.321
Where is now?

00:25:41.321 --> 00:25:44.290
We know it is in Connecticut that year because of it.

00:25:44.290 --> 00:25:46.205
Oh, it was like so.

00:25:46.205 --> 00:25:50.406
It was so silly that we just backed off of it.

00:25:50.406 --> 00:26:02.742
And then it all turned around and I will tell you, I've become close with the guys at Team USA because cam is played, you know, with a bunch of the guys over in In Europe and so forth.

00:26:02.742 --> 00:26:13.259
I've gone to two of those tournaments and those guys are serious guys that they're all about the development, but I think now they see the growth.

00:26:13.259 --> 00:26:26.299
I mean, it's one thing to have a good hockey player, but if you don't have a good Athlete, student, good person, besides being an athlete, it all doesn't go together right, right.

00:26:27.343 --> 00:26:30.250
I love that we're talking about that because I think a lot of people miss that.

00:26:30.250 --> 00:26:45.980
You know, in the younger youth development now we're, mike and I are seeing all the time that there's a tremendous amount of skill but there's not a lot of hockey IQ, there's not a lot of, you know, emotional IQ and we plead with everybody that you know this has to be part of what you're doing, right?

00:26:45.980 --> 00:26:47.326
You have to make your drill's fun.

00:26:47.326 --> 00:26:49.960
You have to make them enjoy it, especially at a young age.

00:26:54.171 --> 00:27:05.263
Go ahead, mike, I know I'm just saying like in the early 90s, like when I started Snapple Express, it was really because there was a void, there was nothing like I know you, mike, you know I cut cam.

00:27:05.263 --> 00:27:06.267
I cut cam.

00:27:06.267 --> 00:27:08.351
I cut cam, I think when he was 11.

00:27:08.391 --> 00:27:12.868
Now, all the kidding I was, we had good, we had a great summer that summer.

00:27:14.519 --> 00:27:17.978
Exactly, I had all the crappy kids, but I think it's like I think it's.

00:27:17.978 --> 00:27:23.317
You know, it's one of these things where, but it was a void, but now everybody is that like there was a.

00:27:23.317 --> 00:27:24.200
There was a there.

00:27:24.200 --> 00:27:31.682
There's no doubt that it's something in the in the late 80s and early 90s of the of the hockey world in the East Coast and Fairfield County In New York.

00:27:31.682 --> 00:27:37.818
There's a vote, there was a void in that, but now everybody's become that good, you know, and I think it's bad.

00:27:37.818 --> 00:27:43.671
I mean, I reflect back and say, well, how do you evaluate 200 kids on a sheet of ice in 15 minutes?

00:27:43.671 --> 00:27:45.605
You can't do it, and you know.

00:27:45.605 --> 00:27:55.653
And then I think the other point of that is instead, now, instead of looking for the person that's a good athlete, we were looking for the best athlete who cares what the kid was like?

00:27:55.653 --> 00:27:56.960
Who cares what the parents were like?

00:27:56.960 --> 00:28:06.599
Who cares if this kid was a psychopath or mom and dad were crazy, like now it's in USA, hockey is actually really done a great job of identifying the person first.

00:28:07.262 --> 00:28:07.785
And that's me.

00:28:07.805 --> 00:28:20.819
Well, let's inject the talent in, because now I can work within the team, I can work within travel, I can work within all of these other aspects and, long-term, this is the person I want representing our country.

00:28:20.819 --> 00:28:27.265
This is the person I want representing my team and I think you guys probably saw that so evidently in.

00:28:27.265 --> 00:28:31.204
Like your process going through Avon old farms and Boston College.

00:28:31.204 --> 00:28:36.359
Like when I look at a guy like Jeff Hamilton and I talked to him and say, well, what was your experience like at Avon old farms?

00:28:36.359 --> 00:28:39.445
And he's like well, that was where I became a man.

00:28:39.445 --> 00:28:51.030
Like that's where I learned all the things that I wouldn't have learned just being in a locker room and and on the bench and All these have to go through that maturation process.

00:28:51.030 --> 00:28:53.779
Some do it at 15, some do it at 19.

00:28:54.602 --> 00:28:56.025
And just, you know what it's a?

00:28:56.025 --> 00:28:57.307
It's a waiting game of same.

00:28:57.307 --> 00:29:00.074
It's a long-term athlete development world.

00:29:00.074 --> 00:29:05.054
Obviously, there are gifted children, you know, you know, caitlin.

00:29:05.054 --> 00:29:17.048
Actually our producer shared a social media post just recently about you know when, when, when, when, social life, and girls and Cars, and when they, when they get in the picture, it changes right.

00:29:18.181 --> 00:29:26.048
So I think that's why we sent them to Avon get away from all that Right right, make it make.

00:29:26.067 --> 00:29:40.083
But I think it's like one of these things where I think what you guys have done in the story you know that that's a success is that watching the boys, you know, kind of go through and be and be people first, and I'm sure people that are around you know that, like they know, okay, these are good people.

00:29:40.083 --> 00:29:43.942
Oh, by the way, that kid plays in the NHL like it, I think that's just.

00:29:43.942 --> 00:29:45.285
That's just a byproduct of food.

00:29:45.305 --> 00:29:50.595
Yeah, mike, another interesting thing if you guys do get to know cam and all our boys.

00:29:50.595 --> 00:29:58.344
Cam's always Acceptable, he's always accessible, he we do.

00:29:58.344 --> 00:30:03.614
We have a foundation that gives back to veterans and so forth.

00:30:03.614 --> 00:30:12.307
Cam and torts have obviously been friends away from hockey and they're Putting together to give a couple service dogs away.

00:30:12.307 --> 00:30:22.700
It's those kind of things that, regardless of the hockey but the community being, you got to be a good person and you got to be accessible.

00:30:23.300 --> 00:30:29.536
I remember when cam was younger some lady came up to me and she's like what kind of skates is cam using?

00:30:29.536 --> 00:30:31.701
My son wants to get the Same skates.

00:30:31.701 --> 00:30:36.413
And one of the things we taught our boys was you never know who's looking at you.

00:30:36.413 --> 00:30:39.406
You never know who's talking about you, so be careful.

00:30:39.406 --> 00:30:45.528
What you say, be nice to everybody, because I've never heard cam said this.

00:30:45.528 --> 00:30:49.059
Tommy said that you know Steve or all any of our boys.

00:30:49.059 --> 00:31:02.705
He said that about me and I think if you get away from the chatter, the gossip and All that other nonsense which exists everywhere, I think it just makes him a better person.

00:31:02.705 --> 00:31:05.372
And last thing, mike, get hammy on the show.

00:31:05.372 --> 00:31:06.473
I'm good buddies with him.

00:31:08.641 --> 00:31:11.529
He's so Kramer shy, you know such a, he's such an introvert guy.

00:31:12.881 --> 00:31:14.330
Trust me, I talked to him a lot.

00:31:15.561 --> 00:31:21.689
I have to tell you, even watching cam he he has great swagger on the ice.

00:31:21.689 --> 00:31:30.112
To me it seems like he's always got a smile on his face and when you watch him in the interviews, if if he messes up, he owns up to it.

00:31:30.112 --> 00:31:35.349
He doesn't try and you know, blame everybody else or the situation.

00:31:35.349 --> 00:31:37.314
He'll say no, that was on me.

00:31:37.314 --> 00:31:45.750
So I really admire you could tell he's just got such a great character, somebody for our kids to look up to.

00:31:45.750 --> 00:31:51.470
What was it like His first NHL game for you guys?

00:31:51.470 --> 00:31:55.099
I just I mean, I get it children's thinking about what it would be like in your shoes.

00:31:55.099 --> 00:32:00.203
What was it like when you first saw him step on the ice as an NHL player?

00:32:02.088 --> 00:32:02.349
Tom.

00:32:02.349 --> 00:32:22.631
Well, interesting enough, john Cam broke his tip fib and I'm just going to weigh into this story a little bit when he was at Avon and he literally fought his way and John Gardner gave him a key to get into the rink at midnight, late at night and he worked hard to get back on that ice.

00:32:22.631 --> 00:32:30.192
John Downing was a surgeon, or orthopedic surgeon for the New York Jets.

00:32:30.192 --> 00:32:36.294
He ended up and he had five boys, I believe, and Jack Downing played with us as well.

00:32:36.294 --> 00:32:37.367
Kids played hockey.

00:32:37.367 --> 00:32:38.632
John loved hockey.

00:32:40.907 --> 00:32:48.672
John passed away and I was at the funeral and it was the day that Cam was trying out for the blue jackets out of college.

00:32:48.672 --> 00:32:57.491
I'm looking and I want to correct me if I'm not saying this correctly, but looking for a psalm, like they have all the numbers.

00:32:57.491 --> 00:33:01.392
A psalm, a psalm, I saw all of a sudden.

00:33:01.392 --> 00:33:02.410
I'm looking everywhere.

00:33:02.410 --> 00:33:05.392
I saw 13, 13, 13,.

00:33:05.392 --> 00:33:07.636
He always was 13, 13.

00:33:07.636 --> 00:33:09.090
All these numbers came up.

00:33:09.090 --> 00:33:10.750
I've got a missed call.

00:33:10.750 --> 00:33:13.592
When I'm in the funeral, I walk outside and he goes.

00:33:13.592 --> 00:33:14.848
I made the team.

00:33:14.848 --> 00:33:18.513
It just so happens I'm from Vancouver.

00:33:18.513 --> 00:33:20.893
My family owns the Jell-O-Lack Chiefs.

00:33:20.893 --> 00:33:25.191
Langley Lords in British Columbia have owned it for 45 years.

00:33:25.191 --> 00:33:40.013
I think that they played Vancouver and they're playing against and I'm thinking of the goalie at the time, because he played at Boston College Cam gets on the ice and scores the first goal.

00:33:40.013 --> 00:33:41.832
Yeah, corey.

00:33:41.832 --> 00:33:43.992
So I meet Corey after he goes.

00:33:43.992 --> 00:33:52.031
Mr Ackle, I gave him an easy one to get him started and I think you were there, I think Tommy was there, some of the boys.

00:33:53.929 --> 00:33:56.154
The blue jackets flew us in for the home game.

00:33:57.405 --> 00:34:05.470
Yeah, it was so exciting and I fell in love with Columbus and I won a couple of really big 50-50s there, which was really more fun.

00:34:07.832 --> 00:34:22.335
I think Cam scored on that first game because I think, with the exception of him being hurt last year and one other year, I think he has scored in every first opening game.

00:34:22.394 --> 00:34:24.179
Yes, yes, in his career, that's so cool.

00:34:24.179 --> 00:34:29.914
It's just so cool, but yeah, it was so exciting yeah.

00:34:30.967 --> 00:34:33.215
He's amazed us from day one.

00:34:33.215 --> 00:34:42.817
I mean, the kid must have had a vision, or not even a vision, but he did it all on his own.

00:34:42.817 --> 00:34:54.378
I mean, he was determined and you know, Tom and I would look at each other because this kid was so tiny, even in high school he'd played Ben Smith.

00:34:54.378 --> 00:34:57.230
In the first school he would shadow Ben Smith.

00:34:58.385 --> 00:35:06.936
I mean the size difference was Ben Smith was double his size and I mean he amazed us.

00:35:06.936 --> 00:35:13.351
We had no expectations ever of any of our kids going to the NHL, let alone Boston College.

00:35:13.351 --> 00:35:18.474
Nothing, and I mean he just kept surprising us.

00:35:19.905 --> 00:35:21.472
Yeah, the most was Mike.

00:35:21.472 --> 00:35:22.905
I coach with Mike Backman.

00:35:22.905 --> 00:35:25.373
You know Mike, right, of course, of course.

00:35:25.824 --> 00:35:26.367
So, mike and.

00:35:26.447 --> 00:35:38.291
I coach and we had the Peewee or the Midgeot majors and Cam played on that team and Cam scores the overtime goal, puck bounces off and goes in.

00:35:38.291 --> 00:35:43.172
Now he's in 89, playing with 86s, and I'm like you know what Mike?

00:35:43.172 --> 00:35:46.568
Mike goes you have no idea what you have here and I go.

00:35:46.568 --> 00:35:48.143
But look at your kid, sean.

00:35:48.143 --> 00:35:49.630
He goes, my kid's in 86.

00:35:49.630 --> 00:35:51.469
Your kid's in 89.

00:35:51.469 --> 00:35:52.005
He goes.

00:35:52.005 --> 00:35:53.291
Do you realize that difference?

00:35:53.291 --> 00:35:55.193
He goes, your kid's going to the show.

00:35:55.193 --> 00:36:08.286
And it was Mike Backman that honestly, still to this day, has so much love, support and commitment to Cam as a younger player, and Cam does.

00:36:08.286 --> 00:36:12.329
When he's in town he'll go help him with his camps and things like that.

00:36:12.784 --> 00:36:13.911
Well, it's still cool to have him.

00:36:13.911 --> 00:36:19.791
So we're a really unique area here on a podcast with hockey parents because they know what 89 and 86 actually means.

00:36:19.811 --> 00:36:22.128
Yes, that's what I know, we're everybody.

00:36:23.204 --> 00:36:33.487
So if you're tuning in from soccer lacrosse then you'll need to look it up, but I think this is a non-age podcast, Just so you know.

00:36:33.487 --> 00:36:59.673
But I think having guys and I think every community, that's what we look for Like whether you're in Minnesota or Northeast or California, now in Florida and the non-traditional hockey markets you're looking at, you need guys like the Michael Backmans that are around that are professionals, Like they're not easy, they're hard, Like these guys are hard guys Chris Cheney that love their players.

00:36:59.744 --> 00:37:21.032
I think like Chris Gerwig, I think about him Like a guy like him, is like a loving person, but he's hard and he's tough and when I see these tiny, these are the kind of people I love being around as a coach and being in these director positions, because you can trust them, that they're going to do the right thing, say the right thing, motivate the right way and they're going to get the most out of their athlete.

00:37:21.032 --> 00:37:31.391
Whether you're a tiny little player that maybe has some potential or this big, massive individual that people expect a lot out of you already.

00:37:31.391 --> 00:37:43.681
So I think it's like that's what's great about all these little hockey communities is that you've got to find those people, and I think Cam would be the first one to say it Listen, I'm nowhere without those people, like without those people pushing me.

00:37:43.681 --> 00:37:52.791
Yeah, it looks great where I am now, but all that, that diamond, was built by all this pressure I had positive pressure I had when I was a young.

00:37:54.224 --> 00:37:55.208
He had Marvin.

00:37:55.208 --> 00:37:56.431
For God's sakes, Mike.

00:37:56.431 --> 00:37:57.956
Well, I'll mention that.

00:37:58.389 --> 00:37:59.280
But yeah, but every minute.

00:37:59.280 --> 00:38:02.193
So you had the toughest at the top you had the toughest.

00:38:03.086 --> 00:38:07.413
Well, we're alluding to my next question here, which I think is important for the listeners as well.

00:38:07.413 --> 00:38:19.813
And, Tom, I know you were his coach for many years, but I'm interested in what made the great or horrible coaches stand out, because I think a lot of times as parents were looking well, who knows the game the best?

00:38:19.813 --> 00:38:24.215
And coaching is so much more than just knowing the hockey IQ.

00:38:24.215 --> 00:38:26.766
It's a big part of it, but it's really.

00:38:26.766 --> 00:38:28.474
Can you express that?

00:38:28.474 --> 00:38:31.090
Can you communicate that in a way that it's retained by the player?

00:38:31.090 --> 00:38:34.371
Because, again, I've always said you can be the best tactician on the planet.

00:38:34.371 --> 00:38:36.932
If you can't effectively communicate, it's irrelevant.

00:38:36.932 --> 00:38:41.329
So what do you think, from a development standpoint, of all your boys right?

00:38:41.329 --> 00:38:43.289
What are the best coaches and why?

00:38:45.675 --> 00:38:46.096
You know what?

00:38:46.096 --> 00:38:47.490
I coach them a lot.

00:38:47.490 --> 00:38:52.047
So I'm going to tell you from my wife's standpoint make it fun.

00:38:52.047 --> 00:39:02.791
And I mean this seriously, because I would have some kids that would come off the ice crying and I would go talk to them and they're like I just want to play.

00:39:02.791 --> 00:39:10.876
So I think, if you can make it fun we always made we would do a lot of skill set.

00:39:10.876 --> 00:39:18.356
But we'd do a lot of fun competitive skill set, true cones racing each other, doing things that they're.

00:39:18.356 --> 00:39:22.530
If it's not fun, if work isn't fun, I wouldn't be doing that.

00:39:22.530 --> 00:39:41.394
I'm just telling you and, if you can, the coaches they've had, they've seen it all and some coaches are different, but the coaches that got the most out of the kids were the ones that made the development fun.

00:39:41.394 --> 00:39:44.429
That's really what I would say.

00:39:44.490 --> 00:39:54.271
I love it, yeah, no listen, it sounds simple, but I think and Mike said this earlier like the younger version of me coaching, I don't think I understood that as much as I do today.

00:39:54.271 --> 00:39:58.313
Right, is that you have to make this smiling.

00:39:58.313 --> 00:40:01.791
If you're not, it's a game, and you hear the NHL players say that all the time.

00:40:01.791 --> 00:40:02.253
It's a game.

00:40:02.253 --> 00:40:04.688
It's my job now, but it's a game.

00:40:05.110 --> 00:40:18.414
Yeah, and to Alan's and Tom's point about them having to recognize that as parents it's so hard for any coach to accept the fact that that's the way they're going to run their team, because there's so much pressure on them Like what the hell?

00:40:18.414 --> 00:40:20.456
You just having fun out here, like a lot of parents, don't?

00:40:20.476 --> 00:40:21.224
see that I've gotten that.

00:40:21.224 --> 00:40:22.208
I've had people tell me that.

00:40:22.469 --> 00:40:28.251
Yeah, like well, these kids are having too much fun and I joke around like giving my little learn to play kids and stuff and like guys, if you're not, you're smiling out here.

00:40:28.251 --> 00:40:31.614
That's not a good thing, because we can't have you too much fun.

00:40:31.614 --> 00:40:32.288
It is hard work.

00:40:32.288 --> 00:40:35.590
This is supposed to be hard, so I think Hockey is zero fun, sir.

00:40:37.668 --> 00:40:39.213
I mean, and that's all these guys are.

00:40:39.213 --> 00:40:45.135
When you look at the professional level, at any profession, it's got to be fun.

00:40:45.135 --> 00:40:46.570
You've got to love coming to the rink.

00:40:46.570 --> 00:40:52.034
So obviously we've seen in camps had some tough coaches at the NHL level.

00:40:52.034 --> 00:41:00.112
And they think but there must be some element of fun in there, though, because you couldn't do it.

00:41:00.974 --> 00:41:10.032
Yeah, and also I will tell you one of the things in Cam will share this with you the coaches his NHL coaches and Columbus always struggled.

00:41:10.032 --> 00:41:13.869
He always stayed, he was always respectful.

00:41:13.869 --> 00:41:34.847
When, if someone was let go, he'd always reach out to them and it really has played well, because even when those coaches get on other teams, they go out of their way to meet Cam in a hallway and that is really cool to me for him, right, Right.

00:41:35.985 --> 00:41:40.889
Yeah, and I imagine you're just as proud of that as him being an NHL player.

00:41:40.889 --> 00:41:41.527
Oh yeah.

00:41:42.105 --> 00:41:43.369
I could be more proud of that.

00:41:43.369 --> 00:41:45.528
To be honest with you, that's awesome.

00:41:45.528 --> 00:41:46.793
Yeah, yeah.

00:41:47.505 --> 00:42:09.692
Yeah, I think that to the parents listening when you listen to Tom and Ellen, I think that's a really important point you both just made Is that when you're lost in having an 8, 9, 10, 11-year-old and they're screaming or they don't want to wake up, christy and I just talked about this yesterday, about the joy but the strife of having young kids Right, when it's all said and done, in terms of them becoming adults.

00:42:09.692 --> 00:42:17.793
There's two parents of an NHL player saying that I'm actually more proud of the type of person he's become than the NHL player he's become.

00:42:17.793 --> 00:42:20.250
Yeah, right, and I think that's a note, go ahead.

00:42:20.465 --> 00:42:22.054
Just a little example.

00:42:22.054 --> 00:42:25.668
The other night Cam was benched.

00:42:25.668 --> 00:42:27.706
He was a healthy scratch.

00:42:27.706 --> 00:42:31.106
To me that's devastating.

00:42:31.106 --> 00:42:32.164
I want to kill.

00:42:32.164 --> 00:42:34.155
Like I am so competitive.

00:42:34.295 --> 00:42:36.036
I'm like oh my you didn't write an email about that.

00:42:36.036 --> 00:42:37.284
You didn't write an email about that.

00:42:37.284 --> 00:42:38.248
You didn't write an email towards.

00:42:38.481 --> 00:42:40.068
I had to buy a new TV though.

00:42:41.659 --> 00:43:01.710
The way Cam handled it, he with such dignity, like I was texting him, you know, and my outlook was so different than his and I was so impressed with what he was saying.

00:43:01.710 --> 00:43:05.164
I mean, he is just.

00:43:05.164 --> 00:43:14.050
It's hard whether you're a kid or an adult, I mean to be benched because you're not putting the goal.

00:43:14.050 --> 00:43:18.070
The puck in the net is devastating.

00:43:18.070 --> 00:43:20.728
Like he can't be more hard on him.

00:43:20.728 --> 00:43:23.668
There's no one harder on him than himself.

00:43:23.668 --> 00:43:27.664
That he's not putting the puck in the net, like he's a natural and the kids is the old team.

00:43:28.519 --> 00:43:50.452
He's a natural goal scorer and to be benched by the coach, who they have an outside love for each other, you know, it's like, oh my God, how come he's doing this to Cam, like it's not, like he doesn't want to score a goal, and Cam just is so reflective and he's like look, it's on me.

00:43:50.452 --> 00:44:04.032
I mean I need to be better, and you know I'll say some things to him that I'm not going to repeat but he's like no, no, mom, you're wrong.

00:44:04.199 --> 00:44:12.751
Like it's really, like I just, I just am going through a bad time and I just have to reflect and just keep trying as hard as I can.

00:44:12.751 --> 00:44:18.867
That's all I can do is I can control what I can control, and it's just so impressive.

00:44:19.409 --> 00:44:21.684
Yeah, I know how I feel when you yell at me.

00:44:21.704 --> 00:44:25.268
Yeah, I'm having a great time you don't count, you don't count.

00:44:26.059 --> 00:44:27.083
But I think it's but that's I mean.

00:44:27.204 --> 00:44:28.541
I think that's a great see.

00:44:28.541 --> 00:44:36.728
This is what I love is that you have this perspective, like I'm sure you guys are more upset, like you're up there like what the hell you know we got to send female.

00:44:36.748 --> 00:44:37.329
We got to call him.

00:44:37.329 --> 00:44:38.271
Let's find out what's going on.

00:44:38.599 --> 00:44:40.463
Like I'm, heated up right, but I think and I think.

00:44:40.463 --> 00:44:43.664
But the perspective is, you know well, do we need to do?

00:44:43.664 --> 00:44:51.360
We need to be that heated up with an eight year old, and I think this is where you know that's the lesson is like.

00:44:51.360 --> 00:44:57.166
We can't expect an eight year old to go back to mom and dad and say no, I got it Cause the eight year old is just going to parent the parent.

00:44:58.445 --> 00:45:04.025
And I think for now, I think the other side of this is being the parent saying hey, listen, the coach obviously has some differences.

00:45:04.025 --> 00:45:05.726
They want to get some motivation at you.

00:45:05.726 --> 00:45:08.545
They clearly love you or they like, or you got to spin it any way.

00:45:08.545 --> 00:45:09.246
You have to do it right.

00:45:09.246 --> 00:45:15.405
You're on your team and you know let's take some self accountability and let's make this work.

00:45:15.405 --> 00:45:16.188
You know for you.

00:45:16.260 --> 00:45:23.210
Like how could we and we've talked about this all the time Like how do you take that experience and make it a positive?

00:45:23.210 --> 00:45:27.726
And then now we have to do it in a pressure cooker of us as parents and kids.

00:45:27.726 --> 00:45:35.106
Like we're all self-centered, like we only care about our kid, we don't care about the team, we don't care about what the locker rooms like.

00:45:35.106 --> 00:45:35.702
Like it's always.

00:45:35.702 --> 00:45:36.746
Like I laugh all the time.

00:45:36.746 --> 00:45:40.606
Like I can't believe they don't name that person captain, or I can't believe they don't have this person to go.

00:45:40.606 --> 00:45:45.487
You're not in that locker room, you don't know what that is like, you don't know what that player does in practice.

00:45:45.487 --> 00:45:51.766
You're just watching it on TV and I think you know and you guys obviously have a different perspective, you're living it.

00:45:51.766 --> 00:45:59.088
But I think having you know and it's okay for you to be emotional and pissed, but at the end of the day, the athlete has to take it.

00:46:01.000 --> 00:46:36.166
And here's how gracious he is, because I'm a reporter and I've had to throw the camera and microphone in front of athletes' faces who are pissed because of whatever happened in the game and they can be rude and obnoxious and whack you away but he had to face that camera and all those reporters asking him a question about his situation and he was so gracious and again he said that's not me, he took full responsibility.

00:46:36.840 --> 00:46:41.347
My heart was just being squeezed when I I can't imagine what it was like for you.

00:46:41.467 --> 00:46:42.442
Ellen but.

00:46:42.521 --> 00:46:57.925
I was like I can feel how difficult that was and he knew you were coming too Trust me he knew the night before I'm on the phone with him, he goes, oh so unbelievably gracious I was just yeah.

00:46:58.340 --> 00:47:07.666
And I think of those situations, too, with my kids, where I don't understand why they get benched, why they're sitting, why they're not out there playing and I want to ring that coach's neck.

00:47:07.666 --> 00:47:10.746
You know, and just like you, you just have to.

00:47:10.746 --> 00:47:12.945
You got to work through your emotions.

00:47:12.945 --> 00:47:18.490
Let the kids handle it and let them figure it out.

00:47:19.000 --> 00:47:19.702
Which is what.

00:47:20.063 --> 00:47:21.047
Cam is doing.

00:47:21.427 --> 00:47:26.628
Yeah, there's an old saying you love the one that needs it the most.

00:47:26.628 --> 00:47:36.065
So you need to give the love to the ones that need it at the time they need it, and with five kids, you got to share a lot of love at different times.

00:47:36.065 --> 00:47:37.445
Some needed it sometimes.

00:47:37.445 --> 00:47:39.364
Ellen yells at the referees.

00:47:39.364 --> 00:47:40.067
For God's sake.

00:47:41.782 --> 00:47:43.327
I mean, we used to hear it out in stairs.

00:47:44.000 --> 00:47:47.568
Well, I do, but it's in the privacy of my own living room.

00:47:49.079 --> 00:47:50.626
Yeah, I know, but I'm in the other room.

00:47:52.920 --> 00:47:55.088
Maybe the only one that hears me.

00:47:55.460 --> 00:47:57.327
I'll do something I rarely do on this show.

00:47:57.327 --> 00:48:00.028
The date is January 8th, 2024.

00:48:00.028 --> 00:48:07.596
And I don't know if you do both know this, but I live sorry in Philadelphia, so I've been watching Cam for his whole career.

00:48:07.596 --> 00:48:17.027
Now you may know him a little better than we do, obviously, but my prediction is this, knowing the type of accountability he has, is that, as we said, he's taking that benching and stride.

00:48:17.027 --> 00:48:24.050
I have a feeling when he scores a goal, the floodgates are going to open and I think he's proven that many times in his career.

00:48:24.440 --> 00:48:29.126
And the reason I'm bringing that up is not because I want to fact check me in 2027 to see what happened.

00:48:29.126 --> 00:48:37.507
The reason I'm bringing that up is because that is an aspect of a great player is that they can take the hit, and we see this in youth hockey all the time.

00:48:37.507 --> 00:48:39.668
The kid will take a hit, not be accountable.

00:48:39.668 --> 00:48:40.463
They can't recover.

00:48:41.039 --> 00:48:48.067
And, as Mike said, this is your opportunity as a parent to really look at the situation of what do you control in this situation?

00:48:48.067 --> 00:48:49.565
What can you work on in this situation?

00:48:49.565 --> 00:48:50.963
Can you bounce back?

00:48:50.963 --> 00:48:52.445
And I'm going to take it a step further.

00:48:52.445 --> 00:48:55.244
This is not a hockey skill, this is a human skill.

00:48:55.244 --> 00:49:02.661
I have always said you are defined by how you respond to adversity, not the adversity that happens Typically.

00:49:02.661 --> 00:49:04.248
You don't have a lot of control over the adversity.

00:49:04.248 --> 00:49:18.565
You have control how you respond to it and I think that your son and again he's proven this over his entire career, this is not a new thing is that when one goes in the net, the whole polarity of the situation is going to flip, and maybe John Tortorello knows that about him.

00:49:18.565 --> 00:49:19.568
Maybe he sees that about him.

00:49:19.588 --> 00:49:20.369
He does yes.

00:49:20.429 --> 00:49:21.592
He does Right.

00:49:21.592 --> 00:49:22.903
He knows them well enough.

00:49:23.365 --> 00:49:24.300
Yeah, that's.

00:49:24.300 --> 00:49:28.849
Another aspect of great coaches is understanding how to motivate a young player.

00:49:28.849 --> 00:49:34.003
And again, in youth hockey it's got to be done a certain way when you're getting paid, it's a job you have to understand another way.

00:49:34.003 --> 00:49:37.208
Another, not only two questions left.

00:49:37.208 --> 00:49:38.706
I wanted to ask this one about Cam2.

00:49:38.706 --> 00:49:43.364
I think this is an important one for the kids that listen to the show.

00:49:43.364 --> 00:49:46.684
Is that when he made the NHL, the work didn't stop.

00:49:46.684 --> 00:49:48.605
It wasn't oh, I've made it, I'm here.

00:49:48.605 --> 00:49:50.846
If anything, I'm sure he worked harder.

00:49:50.846 --> 00:50:01.766
Can you talk a little bit about the training aspect, the stuff that we don't see on television, that keeps him becoming an all-star, a great player, and worries that today?

00:50:05.615 --> 00:50:09.304
So he worked with Mike Prentice in the summers.

00:50:09.304 --> 00:50:14.137
A lot of the NHL guys that come back to Connecticut, mike, you know who Prentice is.

00:50:14.137 --> 00:50:29.315
He just started to get into more of a routine, get more into health, getting into treatments, stretching, learning how because one of the things when he first made a pro he was taking a sign and goes.

00:50:29.315 --> 00:50:36.920
You know there's 84 games or 86 and whatever it is, and the younger guys seem to get out of the gate for 20.

00:50:36.920 --> 00:50:45.336
Yeah, lose some staining and then some guys just fall right off and end up in the minors for a while just because you got to fill that role.

00:50:45.949 --> 00:50:54.818
So every year, unfortunately, now that when Cam's been in Columbus he owns the battery, so he's got his own ice, his own training facility.

00:50:54.818 --> 00:51:01.144
He's up early and he's pretty gluten-free with his diet.

00:51:01.144 --> 00:51:09.722
He's really true to you, know his body and listening to his body and nutrition is key for him.

00:51:09.722 --> 00:51:16.059
Working out and doing it early, not taking the month off after your office.

00:51:16.059 --> 00:51:19.159
That other month getting back into it is worse.

00:51:19.159 --> 00:51:21.297
So he doesn't start.

00:51:21.297 --> 00:51:29.318
He might take a week off, but I think nutrition, staying up on his health and just training he's getting strong.

00:51:29.869 --> 00:51:31.210
Getting strong yeah, but he's not.

00:51:31.210 --> 00:51:37.936
And putting weight on in the summer putting weight on because a lot of weight comes off when they start the season.

00:51:39.170 --> 00:51:40.596
That's an interesting perspective, good point.

00:51:41.451 --> 00:51:44.400
And he's a big gel stick guy, so I like him like that so.

00:51:46.355 --> 00:51:47.940
So I think you need some gel sticks.

00:51:47.940 --> 00:51:49.476
No, I got too many from Lounsbury.

00:51:49.590 --> 00:51:50.594
Lounsbury sends me gel sticks.

00:51:51.130 --> 00:51:52.396
I go through those a lot with our kids.

00:51:52.610 --> 00:52:10.199
We're a big like so so watching Cam and the batteries are a great example actually of finding places that you could be not in practice and a non-traditional hockey related working out but having a long-term view of development.

00:52:10.289 --> 00:52:25.516
Like, say, okay, I really got to work on like I remember just listening to interviews, just the gel stick was a good example of just saying, well, if I can add five mile per hour in my shot or shoot from 10 feet farther out, that's a couple of million dollars in my pocket.

00:52:25.516 --> 00:52:28.478
Like, if I can increase my performance.

00:52:28.478 --> 00:52:31.099
And now if we can start putting that down level by level.

00:52:31.099 --> 00:53:00.597
If you're 10 years old and you can just increase your performance just a little bit by understanding that if you're going to a tournament that it can't be Chipotle and Taco Bell it's got to be getting up in the morning, having a routine, having a good breakfast, hydrating, staying and like the kids like I think most kids don't get is the whole process of after the game and the recovery process starting, because when you're 12 and 13, you probably can play, get up and play.

00:53:01.090 --> 00:53:03.735
And either big back, yeah, and you could do that.

00:53:03.789 --> 00:53:14.302
But when you're in college and now you're in pro and you're in, you know again, and I'm sure they get a lot of resources, but they don't have those same resources given to them in the season ends, like during the season.

00:53:14.302 --> 00:53:16.007
It's probably much easier for them to be playing.

00:53:16.250 --> 00:53:42.396
You know, mike, one of the things I want to bring up and this is something I've noticed from pro athletes, really pro people right Is the pursuit of perfection, knowing that it's not achievable, and having that higher level goal right and that higher purpose that you know you really can't achieve, but in pursuing it you achieve so much more than if you just try to okay, I want to have this many goals this season, right, which I'm not saying is not a good goal to have.

00:53:42.396 --> 00:53:46.717
I'm just saying that infinite game that term I always like to use from that Simon Sinek book.

00:53:46.717 --> 00:54:00.041
If you end up pursuing the infinite game, knowing you can achieve it and you can accept that mentally, it's an amazing place to be in, right, because you're loving the journey, right.

00:54:00.041 --> 00:54:02.858
And I think that's another thing we forget sometimes.

00:54:02.858 --> 00:54:10.614
And again, look, it happens to all of us in your life there's moments, there's things that happen that take you, they knock you off course, right, and it's hard.

00:54:10.614 --> 00:54:13.753
And again, going back to what we said earlier, it's how you respond to that.

00:54:14.530 --> 00:54:20.739
So, lee, one of the things also that we've kind of haven't really touched on is life in general.

00:54:20.739 --> 00:54:28.097
These are young men, these are adults, they're family men, they have children, they have wives.

00:54:28.097 --> 00:54:31.018
They've got dynamics away from the rink.

00:54:31.018 --> 00:54:33.233
Cam comes home.

00:54:33.233 --> 00:54:38.237
Natalie is an absolute rock star Because, honestly, you got to buy into.

00:54:38.237 --> 00:54:40.134
What is my husband?

00:54:40.134 --> 00:54:41.557
What does our family need?

00:54:41.557 --> 00:54:49.094
Right For everything, just because they're traveling a lot and he brings the kids to Voorhees, he brings them to the rink.

00:54:49.094 --> 00:54:55.360
I got a call yesterday from Declan they call me Googs, by the way and Ellen's Tammy.

00:54:55.360 --> 00:54:57.250
I'm sorry, but that's our nickname.

00:54:57.289 --> 00:54:57.711
Amy and Googs.

00:54:57.711 --> 00:54:59.077
That's how we're gonna rename the episode.

00:54:59.077 --> 00:55:00.673
It's like a big date of moron.

00:55:04.050 --> 00:55:05.617
I'm like, well, what's going on?

00:55:05.617 --> 00:55:05.990
He goes.

00:55:05.990 --> 00:55:07.456
It's my first day of hockey.

00:55:08.250 --> 00:55:09.213
And he goes it's something.

00:55:10.070 --> 00:55:20.797
And then he goes into something else I get to bring lunch to school, so Cam will get up and probably bring them to school head over for the pre-game skate today.

00:55:20.797 --> 00:55:32.097
He gets to spend time with them and I know how much those children now they have Fallon has changed his life and that's what people don't realize.

00:55:32.097 --> 00:55:52.456
These are real people with families that have kids that are sooner or later are gonna go through everything that everybody's listening to on this podcast in the next 10 years and it's cyclical and but to see how they as a family are with the family, it's amazing.

00:55:53.291 --> 00:56:01.333
Yeah, I got to watch Max Pascharelli's try it out with our brick team up at Stanford and I was laughing watching him.

00:56:01.333 --> 00:56:09.501
I was watching him pacing back and forth and back and forth and I was like, hey, everybody's a parent at some point.

00:56:09.501 --> 00:56:14.009
And I think you're just watching your kid, like you got to just please do the right thing.

00:56:14.411 --> 00:56:18.920
Hey, Max, if you don't like it, buy the team, Right, you're just like.

00:56:18.920 --> 00:56:20.349
It's definitely a better spot.

00:56:20.530 --> 00:56:22.797
I'll say this too, that, tom.

00:56:22.797 --> 00:56:35.777
We do a lot of team building with our groups and in our businesses and one of the things I coach coaches on is that if you had the same players, the same roster, every season, I'd ask the question do you have the same team?

00:56:35.777 --> 00:56:49.795
And I said the answer is always no, because life happens and, as you said, when you get to professional coaching marriage, divorce, kids, injuries, parents, life, life- happens Life, life happens.

00:56:50.371 --> 00:57:01.193
And I love that you brought that up and it also allows me to bring you on for another episode which we maybe will do but no it's a good point because I think let's talk to the fans of the NHL listening to the show, just very quickly.

00:57:01.849 --> 00:57:08.556
You see so little of these people's lives and when you work in the game you start to realize that you get a lot of empathy.

00:57:08.556 --> 00:57:19.836
You see so little but we are so judgmental on what they should be doing a better game, knowing absolutely nothing about the tactics, knowing nothing about what's been in the locker room.

00:57:20.369 --> 00:57:20.710
And so.

00:57:20.811 --> 00:57:25.579
I always try and kind of just I always say fans are insanely important to the game.

00:57:25.579 --> 00:57:27.989
There is no doubt about it, but it's.

00:57:27.989 --> 00:57:34.697
Can you give a little bit of grace to the understanding that you know nothing about what's going on in that room?

00:57:35.099 --> 00:57:39.960
You know what Fans, fans and parents are really the entertainment of the game.

00:57:41.730 --> 00:57:42.956
That's a book we're gonna write.

00:57:44.309 --> 00:57:45.635
We're writing a lot of books here.

00:57:45.635 --> 00:57:47.918
Do I have to like underwrite this stuff?

00:57:47.918 --> 00:57:49.074
No, that's where we come in.

00:57:49.250 --> 00:57:50.757
We're building a new business here right now.

00:57:50.757 --> 00:57:54.451
It's called Gats and Gammie's Guy and Goose, goose and.

00:57:54.471 --> 00:57:57.119
Gammie huh Goose and Gammie Aki, oh yeah.

00:57:58.150 --> 00:57:59.034
Last question for me.

00:57:59.034 --> 00:58:06.297
There are a lot of parents obviously listening to this show and let's be very realistic, we've all had that thought of you, know, I wonder.

00:58:06.297 --> 00:58:19.858
I just wonder if this kid of mine can do something in this game, whether it's a positive thought or a negative thought, as two parents again of several boys, one who's made it to the NHL, had a very successful career.

00:58:19.858 --> 00:58:30.550
Speaking to the parents, listening Any words of advice, wisdom for them about the journey as a whole, Education first.

00:58:30.590 --> 00:58:31.650
That's what we went for.

00:58:31.650 --> 00:58:40.144
That's why, when Cam could have gone to the development program, fortunately we had the financial resources to send two boys to prep school.

00:58:40.144 --> 00:58:47.043
It was a hockey school, for sure, and John Gardner really wanted the boys there.

00:58:47.043 --> 00:58:57.768
But on the same hand, like when they wanted him to go to the development program, I'm like guys, I want him to get an education.

00:58:57.768 --> 00:59:00.266
That's key to us.

00:59:00.266 --> 00:59:06.489
More importantly, he knew, I believe as a freshman he got a full ride to Boston College, I believe.

00:59:06.489 --> 00:59:08.168
So he knew very early.

00:59:08.168 --> 00:59:11.543
So that was really everything that we had hoped for.

00:59:11.543 --> 00:59:15.030
Our boys, tommy, went to business school at Boston College.

00:59:15.030 --> 00:59:17.728
They both played hockey.

00:59:17.728 --> 00:59:22.150
I mean, sometimes you just don't know, you can dream about it, but we were.

00:59:23.074 --> 00:59:32.250
I need to just say something that you're correct, in the older, with the older kids high school, maybe late middle school.

00:59:32.250 --> 00:59:50.295
But I will tell you the struggles I had in elementary school because I was the one that was taking the boys out of school on a Friday afternoon, and the amount of anger and pushback from the teachers and the principal.

00:59:50.295 --> 01:00:22.496
It wasn't easy and all I kept saying in my own head and heart was that Two hours of school, of sitting down in school, is not going to outweigh the experience and the learning that they're going to get with a team and travel and play, because it's all a learning experience.

01:00:22.496 --> 01:00:24.393
And I kept saying that in my head.

01:00:24.393 --> 01:00:25.014
Am I right?

01:00:25.014 --> 01:00:25.775
Am I right?

01:00:26.277 --> 01:00:28.621
And I felt in my you got in trouble for that?

01:00:28.643 --> 01:00:29.123
What's that?

01:00:29.123 --> 01:00:33.644
I did the same argument and my kids got detention, so I don't know.

01:00:33.644 --> 01:00:34.407
You know what I'm saying.

01:00:34.407 --> 01:00:35.050
That's my argument.

01:00:36.313 --> 01:00:37.789
That's my wife's argument all the time Back.

01:00:37.789 --> 01:00:41.780
Like we go to Pittsburgh, he's like okay, well, we got to go to the Andy Warhol Museum, we got to go to the Steve Museum.

01:00:41.780 --> 01:00:48.771
We got to go to the tram we got to go do these other things that when you're in there you can't just sit in your hotel all day.

01:00:49.072 --> 01:01:01.858
but if you could come back and I personally I wish You're 100% right and I always try to convince the teachers ahead of time hey look, we got this term, but we're going to the hockey museum.

01:01:01.858 --> 01:01:04.590
We're going to be seeing.

01:01:06.393 --> 01:01:09.742
I wish more teachers would take that and say okay, we'll send me a paperback on the Andy Warhol.

01:01:09.762 --> 01:01:10.885
Museum, exactly.

01:01:10.885 --> 01:01:11.847
So keep listening.

01:01:11.847 --> 01:01:15.398
He's up on us, okay, yeah.

01:01:16.510 --> 01:01:22.916
And the game you're talking about, believe it or not, it was for the New York Rangers junior team going to Feewee, Quebec.

01:01:22.916 --> 01:01:25.717
We're a planet, Madison Square Garden in New Islanders.

01:01:25.737 --> 01:01:27.402
That's a pretty big story.

01:01:27.402 --> 01:01:29.409
Yeah, I mean that was just one of the situations.

01:01:29.469 --> 01:01:32.657
But that was a big one that we got in a lot of trouble for.

01:01:33.260 --> 01:02:00.936
Yeah, I mean, I had teachers tell me because Kim had a language deficit believe it or not, you would never know it when he was in school and his speech therapist would sit there and tell me if you don't start reading to him, or if he doesn't take books with him, he'll never get into college, He'll never improve on his language and it would kill me, Like it would kill me as a mother.

01:02:00.936 --> 01:02:04.079
I felt so deficient.

01:02:04.079 --> 01:02:07.139
I was exhausted by the way, with so many kids.

01:02:07.409 --> 01:02:11.561
But so whether we know it or not I was exhausted at night.

01:02:12.090 --> 01:02:14.818
So I didn't really read to them all that much.

01:02:15.409 --> 01:02:18.619
Ellen, to your point, it is all about balance to me.

01:02:18.619 --> 01:02:19.742
I think at the end of the day.

01:02:19.742 --> 01:02:20.771
That's what you're both saying.

01:02:20.771 --> 01:02:21.353
Is that you know?

01:02:21.353 --> 01:02:24.711
Look, I like some of these old cliche phrases.

01:02:24.711 --> 01:02:25.896
It takes a village.

01:02:26.831 --> 01:02:30.097
It does raise a person, and I think Christie, Mike, you know you said it too.

01:02:30.097 --> 01:02:35.778
It's like what I like to do is I go to the teacher in the beginning of the year and I say, look, my kid plays hockey.

01:02:35.778 --> 01:02:38.835
And there's probably going to be a few dates where we come to you and say he's got a tournament.

01:02:38.835 --> 01:02:44.543
What I'd like to do is work with you on those dates to find a way to continue his education.

01:02:44.543 --> 01:02:49.873
But he also has to live his life, and now he's in elementary school right now, so I haven't had any issues yet.

01:02:50.434 --> 01:02:52.911
Okay, it's coming, you wait.

01:02:55.913 --> 01:03:12.802
I think there's an aura of you know, trust your gut a little bit with this, I think, and again, it's also balanced If your kids really struggling in school, right, you have to have that conversation right, because, adversely, I'm not for rewarding them with hockey if they're not dedicated to their schoolwork Right.

01:03:12.802 --> 01:03:15.380
But again, that's not the scenario we're talking about here.

01:03:15.650 --> 01:03:18.010
But, ellen, I appreciate you being so honest here.

01:03:18.010 --> 01:03:19.313
I mean it wasn't easy.

01:03:19.313 --> 01:03:21.498
You had a lot of struggles, you had some battles.

01:03:21.498 --> 01:03:22.601
It's difficult now.

01:03:22.601 --> 01:03:22.981
Oh yes.

01:03:23.429 --> 01:03:26.583
It's more difficult now because back then the problem was they.

01:03:26.583 --> 01:03:29.094
They see more concern with listen.

01:03:29.094 --> 01:03:31.842
You're taking this group out of school.

01:03:31.842 --> 01:03:38.016
Four or five kids and all these other kids have to stay in school, and they're the ones upset, not really us.

01:03:38.016 --> 01:03:39.755
It's how it looks with others.

01:03:40.449 --> 01:03:41.974
I mean again, that's an opportunity to me.

01:03:41.974 --> 01:03:43.679
It's an opportunity for the teacher to to.

01:03:43.679 --> 01:03:45.215
Here's a way to communicate now.

01:03:45.215 --> 01:03:46.173
Here's a way to talk about it.

01:03:46.173 --> 01:03:46.972
Why don't we?

01:03:46.972 --> 01:03:49.679
Write on our classmates instead of saying that why are they getting out of school?

01:03:49.679 --> 01:03:53.079
I think that those other kids play violin and do other things.

01:03:53.079 --> 01:03:55.778
I mean it's a balance, it's a community.

01:03:55.778 --> 01:04:04.760
We've again I don't want to get into soapboxes we have lacked the ability to see the value of a community here over the last 10, 15 years probably longer yeah, right.

01:04:06.550 --> 01:04:11.873
Those are so easy to create, where you can create an environment for people to work together, and this is how I'm going to spin it.

01:04:14.181 --> 01:04:17.414
Successful hockey teams do that Right, so Lee what we did is?

01:04:17.414 --> 01:04:19.018
We would all just call it sick.

01:04:19.798 --> 01:04:20.581
Yeah, yeah no.

01:04:22.570 --> 01:04:23.092
What did you get?

01:04:23.092 --> 01:04:25.219
Pick one COVID, the flu.

01:04:26.773 --> 01:04:26.974
I think.

01:04:26.974 --> 01:04:27.978
I think COVID did exist back then.

01:04:27.978 --> 01:04:29.817
We have still never knew what COVID was.

01:04:30.391 --> 01:04:36.103
A little tip hockey parents if you are going to call in sick and go to hockey, don't post on Twitter.

01:04:36.630 --> 01:04:40.289
They just have a hockey haul of things, and we don't have that either.

01:04:40.670 --> 01:04:41.835
You got to do the serious doers.

01:04:41.855 --> 01:04:42.456
I'll see that.

01:04:43.610 --> 01:04:43.992
My wife.

01:04:43.992 --> 01:04:44.936
See my wife, sue, honestly.

01:04:44.936 --> 01:04:47.188
She's like what has ever happened to me.

01:04:47.710 --> 01:04:51.201
I'm like but one last one last interesting story.

01:04:51.201 --> 01:04:53.092
We were contacted, ellen.

01:04:53.092 --> 01:04:59.204
I'll let you share this story about doing like a podcast when we were younger.

01:04:59.204 --> 01:05:07.498
Share this with them because this is really kind of before it's time and interesting, but go ahead, I'll let you share it.

01:05:08.969 --> 01:05:11.815
It wasn't a podcast, it was reality TV.

01:05:11.976 --> 01:05:12.237
Oh no.

01:05:12.869 --> 01:05:13.010
It was.

01:05:13.010 --> 01:05:17.820
Reality TV became famous before Kardashians, before anything.

01:05:17.820 --> 01:05:32.181
And somebody contacted me and said I would love to put a camera in your van while you're in the car with all your boys and do a whole reality series on it.

01:05:32.181 --> 01:05:33.963
All on conflict.

01:05:33.963 --> 01:05:37.199
And I turned around and said my boys never fight.

01:05:37.199 --> 01:05:42.159
I'm like no no it's not going to work out.

01:05:42.539 --> 01:05:43.461
There's no conflict.

01:05:43.541 --> 01:05:48.159
Yeah, you would have been a YouTube sensation.

01:05:48.916 --> 01:05:49.746
I think I would have.

01:05:50.070 --> 01:05:54.981
I think I would have, but I'm just not the type of person that could put out my family that way.

01:05:55.570 --> 01:05:57.454
Luckily, we can all do it now on our own with our phones.

01:05:58.076 --> 01:05:59.099
Yeah, very true.

01:05:59.119 --> 01:05:59.539
We can.

01:05:59.539 --> 01:06:01.476
We can If there's anything.

01:06:01.476 --> 01:06:02.567
All this is a real tick tock.

01:06:02.567 --> 01:06:04.135
Now we can do that right now.

01:06:04.135 --> 01:06:06.655
So, yeah, we have the hockey parent of the week.

01:06:06.715 --> 01:06:10.269
now, when we're all just recording it, guys, listen, that's our time.

01:06:10.269 --> 01:06:13.539
I was going to say, mike and Christie, do you have anything else you want to add before I close?

01:06:13.579 --> 01:06:13.699
this.

01:06:13.699 --> 01:06:17.554
Yes, I'm going to start the children's book goose and Grammy tomorrow.

01:06:17.655 --> 01:06:18.094
It's Gammie.

01:06:18.094 --> 01:06:19.918
It's Gammie, goose and Gammie.

01:06:19.936 --> 01:06:20.577
Goose and Gammie.

01:06:20.597 --> 01:06:21.579
Goose and Gammie.

01:06:21.659 --> 01:06:24.103
Goose and Gammie Children's book Try hockey.

01:06:24.143 --> 01:06:29.217
Tomorrow my little, my little three Caden, cam's middle called me.

01:06:29.217 --> 01:06:30.018
Gumball.

01:06:30.079 --> 01:06:32.992
Gammie, gumball Gammie, I'm always bringing Gumballs.

01:06:33.293 --> 01:06:36.079
Even better, even better, I know.

01:06:36.519 --> 01:06:38.603
I love it, I love it.

01:06:38.603 --> 01:06:40.086
I'm going to be amazing.

01:06:42.235 --> 01:06:44.800
Thank you so much for sharing your story, thank you.

01:06:44.800 --> 01:06:46.501
Very inspirational and fun.

01:06:46.501 --> 01:06:50.380
And it was a lot to really think about too.

01:06:51.092 --> 01:06:54.416
Yeah, we did, Mike, Mike.

01:06:54.416 --> 01:06:55.860
I'll leave you with one last thing.

01:06:55.860 --> 01:06:57.414
I coached the Boston Icemen.

01:06:57.414 --> 01:07:03.862
I had 17 kids 17 kids that played in the NHL from PK Zupan.

01:07:03.862 --> 01:07:08.599
Think of all the 89s, hayes, cam, that whole group.

01:07:08.599 --> 01:07:11.318
I literally had 17 kids on that team.

01:07:11.318 --> 01:07:13.882
We went undefeated for three years.

01:07:13.882 --> 01:07:14.867
Yeah, I know.

01:07:15.871 --> 01:07:43.376
I mean, as a local hockey dad and hockey person in the area, you know where you guys grew up with your kids and we certainly really enjoyed your journey and you know what the boys have done and certainly with Cam's done and I think it's you know it's great for it's great for the area and it's great to see him you know doing what he does outside the rink and off the ice and all those great charities is involved in and the different you know business opportunities he's doing outside the game and we talk about.

01:07:43.416 --> 01:07:46.088
that's really what this podcast is just finding.

01:07:46.088 --> 01:07:57.318
You know, letting parents and kids, you know, because there's so many hockey players that listen to this and you know they're in the car and they're driving home and they're driving from practice like, oh okay, I could do a little bit of this and a little bit of this.

01:07:57.318 --> 01:07:58.240
I better get my grades up.

01:07:58.240 --> 01:08:00.757
I better, you know, maybe communicate with my teachers a little bit better.

01:08:00.757 --> 01:08:03.257
And you know and just understand that it's your.

01:08:03.257 --> 01:08:10.594
You know you, if you love this, if you're a player and you just love this like KM Acton said, loved it then you're going to find a way to get what you need to get.

01:08:10.594 --> 01:08:20.854
Yeah, and you're going to and you're going to make sure you take care of all the things you need to take care of and you better hope you have great parents and a support system that can help you get there and certainly they that your boys have had that.

01:08:21.396 --> 01:08:22.532
Yeah, and Mike, you know what?

01:08:22.532 --> 01:08:26.176
There's a lot of single parents as well, and that's probably even more difficult.

01:08:26.195 --> 01:08:26.395
Yeah.

01:08:27.329 --> 01:08:40.478
And you know we've always had to work around that and help those kids and make sure that we got them to the games and we're supportive and you know they had supervision and things like that, so it's more challenging as well.

01:08:42.012 --> 01:08:45.603
Well, I'll say, I really hope it works out for that Johnny quick guy you were talking about earlier.

01:08:46.204 --> 01:08:47.909
I mean, you know what he's doing.

01:08:47.909 --> 01:08:50.863
Great, I hope you're listening, johnny.

01:08:50.863 --> 01:08:51.930
You know you're a knucklehead.

01:08:52.192 --> 01:08:54.529
You're never going to change Three Stanley cups later.

01:08:54.529 --> 01:08:55.512
I think he's doing all right.

01:08:55.954 --> 01:08:58.532
Yeah, he lives in our town.

01:08:58.532 --> 01:09:00.796
Which he's there, stalls there.

01:09:00.796 --> 01:09:03.061
Who else is up there?

01:09:03.141 --> 01:09:17.423
Oh, I don't know, but when Johnny quick was a young boy coming to a game to play at the Greenwich skating club, his dad got a flat tire on the way and guess who drove by, not knowing who it was.

01:09:17.423 --> 01:09:27.505
But Tom saw a man and maybe you might have seen hockey gear in the car, but you stopped to help the kid get to the game.

01:09:27.505 --> 01:09:34.177
Oh my gosh you didn't even know it was Johnny quick and his dad, we've been friends a long time in his hall

01:09:34.198 --> 01:09:38.038
of fame speech, he better say there was this one time my car.

01:09:38.541 --> 01:09:41.090
That's right, that's right and it was Tom Atkinson.

01:09:42.292 --> 01:09:45.618
If I knew who it was, I would have made sure he never made the car.

01:09:45.698 --> 01:09:46.619
I'm sorry.

01:09:46.619 --> 01:09:48.323
I'm sorry, I have no room in the car for you.

01:09:49.229 --> 01:09:52.618
I can't wait to have you laugh to get his parents on the show too.

01:09:52.759 --> 01:09:55.172
Yes, Tom, I get to.

01:09:55.474 --> 01:09:57.640
I have loved every second of this episode.

01:09:57.640 --> 01:09:59.376
I know the listeners will.

01:09:59.376 --> 01:10:08.537
Yeah, it was a lot of fun, so I just want to, before I close it out, thank you both, not just for your contributions to the game and this podcast, but thanks for just being great people.

01:10:08.537 --> 01:10:10.114
I think that's that.

01:10:10.114 --> 01:10:10.578
It's just.

01:10:10.578 --> 01:10:19.817
It's so important that we share stories like this and share these these types of you know like like tips and tactics and the things that we do is parents, because it takes a village right.

01:10:20.371 --> 01:10:21.293
And it really does.

01:10:22.096 --> 01:10:24.885
Yeah, so thank you so much for being on today.

01:10:24.904 --> 01:10:26.341
Thanks, guys Thank you.

01:10:26.770 --> 01:10:37.092
That's going to do it for this episode of our kids play hockey, powered by NHL sensor, and remember you can listen or see all of our episodes at our kids play hockeycom for Tom and Ellen Atkinson, mike Vannelli and Christian Cash.

01:10:37.092 --> 01:10:38.375
You know, burns, I'm Leo Elias.

01:10:38.375 --> 01:10:39.617
We'll see you in the next edition.

01:10:39.657 --> 01:10:40.918
Bye, our kids play hockey.

01:10:41.319 --> 01:10:41.979
Take care, bye guys.

01:10:42.060 --> 01:10:43.341
Thank you Bye.

01:10:44.143 --> 01:10:46.985
We hope you enjoyed this edition of our kids play hockey.

01:10:46.985 --> 01:10:50.259
Make sure to like and subscribe right now if you found value.

01:10:50.259 --> 01:10:56.470
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01:10:56.470 --> 01:11:01.640
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01:11:01.640 --> 01:11:05.939
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01:11:05.939 --> 01:11:07.042
We're very proud of it.

01:11:07.042 --> 01:11:11.331
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