Slow Cooker Development: Ryan Carter’s NHL Journey & What Youth Hockey Parents Must Know

Hello hockey friends and families around the world, and welcome to another

episode of

Our Kids Play Hockey. I'm Lee Elias, joined as always by my co -host, Mike Bonelli

and Christie Casciano Burns, who, for those of you're not watching, is in the

newsroom this morning, a hazard of the job. We say it. She moonlights as a full

-time news anchor, which she's been doing just a little bit longer than this show.

So we're going to let her have it today. But for those of you're watching, you can

see she has the coolest background in the world today. But here's the thing. Our

guest today played nearly a decade in the NHL winning both the Stanley Cup with

the

Anaheim Ducks and representing Team USA at the World Championships. He's

now a TV

analyst for the Minnesota Wild, co -host of the Wild on 7th podcast and a partner

at ETS Performance, One of the leading youth athlete training programs in the

U .S.,

helping thousands of young players reach their full potential physically and

mentally,

something we love to talk about on this show. So today we're going to talk about

his journey from youth hockey in Minnesota all the way to the NHL and what he's

learned about performance and mindset and how he's helping the next generation

of

players chase their dreams the right way, which is almost a description of this

show, which is pretty cool. He's someone who embodies what it means to grow

through

hockey. Ladies and gentlemen, please help us welcome Ryan Carter to the show

today.

Ryan, welcome to our kids play hockey. Hey, Lee. Wow, thank you. You found a way

to make my bio actually seem long and incredible get. I mean,

usually it's just he's a hockey player. It's really that simple and afraid to get

out of the game a little bit. So I've done my best to stick around. But I

appreciate you guys having me and looking forward to this. Ryan, I can do it again

and just say, you're the hockey guy. Ryan Carter's joining us today. No, you,

it's another minute, another Minnesota hockey guy we're talking to.

Ryan, don't be modest. We're so impressed with your resume. It really is

impressive.

But we would love to hear from you where it all started. So if you could take us

back to when you were a kid, when you were playing hockey, must have looked a

lot

different back then. And what an incredible rise you've had and sort of a different

trajectory for you. Yeah, hey, I won't blame you for that shot at my age and how

hockey looked a lot different back then. But you're absolutely right because one of

the first photos of me playing, actually, was at the rink, learn to skate where we

would like push a folding chair like a metal folding chair around and in the

background it's wooden boards it's an indoor building it's called the hippodrome inwhite bear lake minnesota wooden boards and then the glass was actually just

fencing

so just this little guy was not coming down his nose gear way too big swimming in

his jersey pushing a chair around and for some reason i don't know why i liked it

and i kept going back time after time time but yeah it all started kind of there

and for me i'll elaborate just quickly on why and how i fell in love with the

game of hockey nobody in my family's never played my dad can't skate um my

mother

nobody on her side played but they picked to the right neighborhood and i always

call myself a product of my environment more than um anything else so uh we

butted

up against a cul the sack. So I had two neighbors in the back. And in the middle,

some of those neighbors had played hockey, and they put a rink in the backyard.

And

they had boys my age, and they'd be out there playing. And I'd just sit there in

the window with my, you know, chin on my hand saying, my dad, I want to go out

there. I want to go out there. And I didn't have any hockey gear. They're like, we

don't know what to get you. And eventually I bugged them enough to where

they're

like, if you promise, you'll leave the house, we'll get you whatever you want so so

they got me the gear uh and ironically my dad i threw a ball right handed and i

wrote right handed my dad um he got me a right handed stick and i was using it

the wrong way and he kept giving me a hard time i was like i don't know i i

just used it the other way so play left -handed um but um that's that's where i

got introduced to the game outside just wanting to belong with the neighborhood

guys

yeah i mean when you when you Yeah, when you hear, you know, White Bear Lake,

it's like not a, like you, like you said, you grew up in an environment, like we

hear, though, all the time, like those communities are, you know, synonymous with,

with not only, you know, success and development in this, in this small little petri

dish of hockey called Minnesota, right? I think it's, it's actually amazing the

amount of people we speak to on the show that, you know, come from these small

communities and have success. But I think, you know, I think in your case, you

know, you had a unique path to the NHL, I mean, going undrafted, which is not

unnormal. Like I think people think that's a normal thing. That's, that's, you know,

I mean, that's unnormal, but it's normal that you don't go undrafted. You played

USHL, NCAA, Minnesota State, and eventually carving out a 10 -year career.

Can you tell us a little bit about, you know, that path and because of your, you

know, your youth hockey upbringing and the environment you were in, you know,

what

kind of lessons do you think you could give to today's player, you know, from that,

other than the woodboards and the, and the chain link fence, you know,

opportunity

you had in those other, in those other old great rinks. But, you know, what aresome lessons you could give that, that you present now to or to the athletes you

work with. Yeah, good, good question really, really deep. I'll try to elaborate here

and not go on a complete filibuster. But I think it depends on what the kids want

to hear too, because every kid wants something different from playing the game of

hockey and whether you just enjoy it and you want to be with your friends and you

want to compete. That's great. For me, I was that. But then at certain times

growing up I decided mentally like I actually want to be good at this and I found

like self -confidence and value in trying to put effort in and I learned all these

lessons from the game of hockey kind of chose that area to do that so I think it

depends what you're trying to tell a kid from your experiences based on what they

want to learn but I could talk about what I was like growing up and um it's funny

because minnesota the way hockey works and i say i'm from white bearer lake and

i

think minnesota has so much hockey pride there's you know maybe 30 cities of 20

to

25 000 people maybe slightly bigger that are suburbs of Minneapolis st paul and

this

doesn't do justice to the outstate to lots of great hockey communities um outside

of

the twin cities but minnesotans I feel are the only ones that say the suburb that

they're from. So I'll be in New York and they're like, where are you from? And

I'll say White Bear Lake, Minnesota. And I wholeheartedly believe that's a hockey

thing, you know, because you're proud to say you're from White Bear. Like, I'm not

from Minneapolis. I'm not from St. Paul. Those are different hockey teams, you

know,

and it's a credit to Minnesota in the way that they, they play hockey. It's you

play for your community you know it's not a city team it's not a triple a team

you play community based hockey and that's what it was like christie to your point

growing up it was you play with your neighbors you play with your schoolmates

and

you go compete against the neighboring town you know all the kids you you might

skate with them on the rink outside but those are the guys that you compete

against

and then um that's kind of how it went and loved that fell in love with that kind

of way of hockey. And with that, I was on probably a slower development trajectory

than some people. And Mike, if I'm saying, if you were to have asked the question,

Ryan, why did you go undrafted? It's because I think I developed a really solid way

with good foundation at the community level. Like I wasn't chasing teams. I wasn't

chasing tournaments. Burnout was never part of the equation. It was, hey, just try

to be the best you can be on this team, on that team. And I made B teams and

then I'd make an A team. Then I'd make a B team. Sophomore year of high school,

which is a big deal in Minnesota. I was starting off on JV. So it wasn't the easy

path. But Troy Ward coach in Mancato now in Minnesota State where I played,

he says it great. Development should be in a crock pot not an instant pot so andi think that's kind of the path that i took it was slow and steady uh but with

that i was just kind of determined to be and i got good advice from a coach on

one of my b teams he's like i was upset i didn't make the a team and it was hey

it's simple just be the best where you are or work to be the best where you are

and you'll probably make the next team that you want to make so i didn't have like

a long view yeah didn't have a long view on yeah

christie you muted yourself a crock pot and not an instapot because i think so

many

parents now and kids want the instapot formula um can you still do it in a crock

pot method these days it seems like it's a real struggle though i think I think

you can. I think the competitive advantage with that would be this. I think a lot

of kids right now are in such a hurry to get where they want to go, but they

actually don't know. And parents are with this too. They actually don't know what

is

required once you get there. And I think if you listen to people that have played

in the NHL or gotten to these places and I've got girls now, so the PWHL or

women's college hockey, it's different once you get there. Like everybody's a good

player and you have great respect for everybody's talent. It starts to differentiate

you is how you handle pressure, situations, a locker room,

can you be a good teammate? And it does come down to having talent on the ice,

but I don't think you need to chase all of those things as much as you need to

be slow and understand as a parent and as a player that when it comes down to

performing in the big moments, the things that get you what you would, that

maybe

what you're chasing, which is the next opportunity, are the little things. It's

character. You know, it's having the confidence in pressure situations to still

perform and to not fold. And I think you learn those things by playing at the

adequate level where you have the opportunity to have puck touches and to be in

those situations. So if it's between an A team and a B team, and if you're going

to be on the A team and the person that's looked over in the final minute of a

game, you can't expect to yourself to be ready to play in that situation later on

in life. So you should embrace the fact that, yes, I'd rather be on a B team

right now and touch the puck and be in that situation so that I can learn how to

handle it, what this faceoff looks like, where I need to be, where we need to go.

So I think for people that have the guts and the mental strength to say, yes, I

want to do this in a crock pot, I think that it yields better results in the end.

Let me, can I just ask you something, I mean, based off, and Lee, I'm not going

to take your question so much, but it really, you know, what Ryan bringing up and

is those separating attributes and the things that, you know, give us elite players

or not, right? Or give us the kid that can make the difference. Because like you

just mentioned, like at some level, all the players are elite. They're all great. So

what are they doing? So why is it, though, that we in our culture in youth hockey,

we don't listen to any of that stuff. Like, Why are we fighting against it when

everyone knows, every professional that works with kids every day. You do thisevery

day with kids. You see it in the NHL as a player. You see it now in the

broadcast booth, you know, interviewing players daily, right, and being with them

all

the time. Why is it that we have to fight it all the time that it is not just

common sense? Like, why is it that we're just, Everybody says, well, no, listen,

Ryan Carter, he's one of 7 ,000 professionals that say this is the way it should be

done, but yet we keep doing these other things. Is it really just money, or is it

just greed, or what is it? I actually think people,

they get lost on what they're actually trying to accomplish, and it's really easy.

It's a trap. You look at what you're actually competing for or against and I think

the reason that we chase all these opportunities and maybe we're afraid to take

the

slow path is because you're looking at somebody else you're keeping up with the

Joneses and you're comparing yourself to somebody else when in reality the only

thing

that you're competing against is what you see in the mirror and if you and your

family can be singularly focused on just being the best of you, the reflection in

the mirror and not worrying about what Johnny's doing, what, you know, what

Sarah's

doing, whatever that is and just say, how do I be better today? I think we

eliminate a lot of these problems where people are chasing it and people are

getting

burnt out. I really do. Yeah, I want to pull the threat on this. Mike, I

appreciate that. We'll get to your NHL stuff soon. I know that's exciting. Yeah, but

I want to say. To hell with that NHL stuff. Yeah, yeah. I got to hear about this

secret to finding the answer to this problem. And I agree with you. This is really

good stuff. And Ryan, this is what I'll tell you. We've been doing this show a

long time. And I know that when Mike, Christie and I are all jumping at questions

and talking over each other, that's a good thing. That means we're all invigorated

with what you're saying. You know, I want to rewind back a little bit. First off,

I think you gave one of the most concise and beautiful answers I've ever heard

about the path, right? And we always talk about there is no one path, but I think,

you know, I got to commend you for that. We're definitely going to make that a

microclip. Here's the deal. You know, I think it's important for our audience to

understand. Yes, we're talking about his path to the NHL. We're also talking about

his path on life. Okay. And that it's so important that everything he said about

the slow cooker and taking time finding a good coaching learning to deal with

adversity these are life skills too and these are going to prepare your kid for

life whether they play hockey or not i've always been vulnerable on the show and

it's like i always like to tell people this because i get asked it in in public

like what you say you don't think you don't want your kids to make the nchl and

the pw hl yeah of course i daydream about i'm a human being like of course that

would be amazing But I put almost zero, literally zero focus on that with the kids.And I don't daydream for long. Like there's no parent watching their kid play that

doesn't wonder, oh, maybe one day, right? That's like looking over the snow hill, of

course. But that can't become the driving force of their journey,

right? And Mike, you asked the question, there's so much fomo. And here's the

other

part of it, right? When your kid makes a B team, Ryan, again, I'm the same age as

you. I had somewhat of a similar journey, right? A kid makes the B team now. And

I see parents that are like legit worried what other people will think about their

kid making the B team. And the truth is this, it's just like being a kid. Nobody

cares. Like I don't go around being like, I kid made the B. What a loser. Like, I

don't do that. And I don't think, to be fair, 99 % of parents do that and what's

funny about you know developing kids is that developing adults it's a similar

process

we always tell our kids like don't worry about what other people think about you

right that's not what's important and you just said it right like look in the

mirror who you want to be parents adults we are just as guilty of these things as

the kids we just are able to say it more eloquently and push it away i was just

asked last night about the levels, AA, A, B. And I said you should go where the

best coach for your kid is, no matter what letter is behind that name,

right? Because if your kid plays B and you have the greatest coach ever, he's going

to learn more or she's going to learn more that season than anybody else,

especially

if they're appropriately placed. So when I was growing up, and I'll tell this quick

story right and we'll throw it back to you too i remember one year i did not make

the team i wanted to make and i was i was devastated i was crying in the car

home and here's like i remember my father was with me he was upset too for me

but

the the thing i was told is no you're going to do this that's where you were put

there was no fighting there was no going back to the organization saying where i

deserved to be it was you're going to live with the hand that was dealt that is

the correct in my opinion path all right even if you feel like you were wrong and

then analyze your situation is there a good coach there right will your kid develop

being placed correctly is more important than the damn letter after the team name

all right sorry ryan i'm sure you have now i'm on the soapbox right do you have

things you want to comment on that and to be fair be in minnesota It's a little

different than B in other places, by the way. But again, it's just, but, like, I

think that is a great, you know, like, area to discuss. It's just understanding that

your path, your path is your path. But it is. It's hard. In the Facebook,

Instagram, you know, that I have to post, like, you know, Ryan, right? You never,

you never see the post of the losing score of the weekend tournament. You only

see

the post of the winning score of the weekend tournament. It's like, oh, you're

leaving me in suspense. What happened? You know, on Sunday morning. But I

think it'sjust, it's a crazy thing that we look and we, we are looking for validation and

everybody else, except for, like you said, what's in the mirror. How do you validate

what's in the mirror? Right. And I just, yeah, and I just saw an example of this

this weekend. Friends of mine, their daughter was on a house team and she was a

rock star just scoring all the time a lot of time touching the puck and scoring

and they got lured into going to a triple a team well she's barely played now

they're not thrilled for the coaching um she's not developing so i i think it's

very easy prepared to get caught in up in that, you know,

the alphabet soup, the AAA title, the double A, you know, rather than really

focusing on what's best for developing your young child especially.

Yeah. And so a couple thoughts on that as a coach and as a parent, what I say to

my girls is I can't create the want, You know, like I,

as a player growing up, I wanted it so bad that I was willing to do all of these

things. And you have to make those hard sacrifices. And I just had a conversation

with my daughter because she, she's like, she really loved the team. She was on

last year. And the way in Minnesota, they kind of turn over. So she kind of had

to stay at her level. Everybody else graduated. And she's sad. And she now all of

a sudden is like, I want to work at it this summer because I want to be good

enough to be able to play with that group of people. And I was like, okay, there's

somewhat there. Like, how are you going to get it? Like, what's, it's going to be

hard? What's the hard part? And she's like, well, I think I'm going to work extra

hard and shoot more pucks and skate more and do this. And I was like, that's true,

Natalie, that's true. And that stuff will help you. But sometimes the hard looks too

it's picking the the right food at the right time it's it's picking the right

friends and the right people to hang out with it's those things are hard too and

um i think it's important for for kids to kind of learn those lessons and um lea

i wanted to comment on something you mentioned too because when you get

caught from

the team that you want to play it's an opportunity for the kid to learn like what

What was this? And when you're not, when you don't make the team that you

made,

it's not an indictment on the individual or the player. It's not saying you're not

good enough to be on this team, right? And it's an opportunity, I think,

for kids to learn how to mentally handle some of these tough spots to say, all

right, maybe, maybe the solution to what I wanted now was probably behavior in

the

past and how do I apply that to the future? Could I have done something

differently? Could I have behaved differently to a teammate? Could I have been

more

focused in practice? Could I have shot more pucks? And can I apply that in the

future to get what I want going forward? You don't learn those lessons unless you

face those tough moments. And I'm sure, you know, after you didn't make that

team,

it motivated you to put in work and change you. Yeah. Yeah, you I think theaudience has heard the story enough. But yeah, it's, I've always said the years I

didn't make the teams I wanted to ended up being some of the best years because

you talk about that one, you know, it motivated me that from the point of pain,

right? The other thing, too, is that there was an accountability that you're talking

about right now, too. I'm not talking about me now, just in general, that I think

one of the other things that's changed is that when when I didn't make it,

those were the questions you just said were the questions, right? Well, what can I

do? What do I have control over that I can use to improve? And I think maybe it's

more now than that. I don't know. And I was a kid then. But now I hear, because

I'm behind the scenes a lot more, not the accountability, but the reasons why my

kid should be on this team. Or the reasons why other kid shouldn't be on this

team. I've heard that too. And it's not a very accountable thing, right? I would

like to hear from parents and coaches and players, honestly, when a kid maybe

isn't

put someplace they're happy, from a coach I want to hear, well, these are the

things I want to see you improve on. I think that's another mistake, right, is what

will put kids on a certain team, but we don't give them any guidance on. These are

the things you need to work on. These are the things I want you to get better at,

right? I'm talking about, you know, the lower half of the youth level. And then

from a parent standpoint, you're going to hurt too. If your kid gets cut and they

wanted to make it, not cut. If your kid gets put on a team that you didn't want

to be on and they hurt, you're going to hurt. But part of the parenting journey,

in my opinion, is not appeasing their feelings by saying, well, you should have

made

it. And that kid shouldn't have made it. I mean, that's, in my point, that's

detrimental to your kid. All right. The narrative should be, hey, you didn't make

it. It sucks. I'm feeling it with you. What can we do now to work on your game,

to work on your mentality, to work on your endurance? What do we need to be

accountable for? That is a habit that I'd like to see more families,

more kids adopt because over a 10 -year youth hockey journey,

you're going to build a resilient, strong person whether they play hockey or not

and

i think that's more valuable than almost anything all right yeah go ahead yeah i

completely agree and again i think that comes back to as a parent you can't create

the want that's the question is what do you want from here do you do you want to

do more work do you want to change the way that you're doing things or do you

want to stay the same because all are All are possible options. And young player,

you can decide, but I can't decide this for you. I can't say you didn't make this

team. Now, we're training more, more, more, more, more. That's not the answer.

And I

think that's what a lot of parents will get to, you know, but it's not the answer.

Yeah, Ryan, what we say is, I can't create it. I can help you cultivate it, but I

can't create it, the need and the one. And here's the other thing, too, I think

we'd all agree. If a kid comes back and says, you know, I don't want this anymore.You know, that's okay as well. I mean, I'm not saying as a parent you have to sit

there and just go, okay, hands up in the air. I mean, you have to have a

conversation. But if a kid doesn't want to play anymore and wants to do something

else, that's also okay, right? You know, assuming that, assuming you've had that

conversation, right? This isn't like a one and done type thing of, you know, right

after the tryout is not the time to have that conversation. But I love what you're

saying here about the want because It actually leads into a next question here. I'm

sure it's going to be part of your answer. The drive needed to succeed in hockey

has to be at a pro level, an obsessive level. We ask every NHL player we've had

on the show, what you believe are the difference makers that allows someone to

make

the NHL. We know skill is a prerequisite. But this answer always seems to surprise

people. What do you think it is? What is the secret sauce? What is the element of

making it to the NHL that most people don't see? Yeah. Gosh,

good question.

I think the one that people should probably hear, it was this way for me,

is luck and stick -to -itiveness. Lucky, there's a lot of players, I think that were

very similar to me in talent and work ethic and size and abilities.

Again, you get to a spot where everybody's good. Everything's good. What were

the

differentiators? At times, it was luck and other times it was stick to it in this.

And that isn't having the best tow drag, having the best shot, being the fastest

skater. It was staying in the game, staying in the fight long enough, you know,

mentally being strong enough to say, okay, I'm going to work or take the next

opportunity that's given to you, you know, not be exclusive and take it with

positivity. But if,

just for my high school buddies, if I were to say what differentiated me from them,

it was law. And yeah, at times there were little factors. Like, was I an inch or

two taller than somebody? Yeah, maybe. I do think that you, you're spot -only,

the want is there. Like, if you look, my nose is crooked for a reason. I'm willing

to put my face in front of somebody's hand, you know, just to be able to play the

game. You know, I loved it that much. And everybody's motivated by different

things,

too, right? Like, I, and sometimes you can't, you can't pick or manufacture these

things. I had two sisters. My parents were divorced, of one of my houses was all

80s. I worked my butt off to be able to go to the locker room and hang out with

a bunch of dudes, you know? That's like, that's what I wanted. So everybody's

motivators are different, but, and that was one that was important to me, is just

find a way to continue to hang out with these guys that you enjoy spending time

with. And so I think for me, those were probably the couple is just a willing to

sacrifice whatever it takes for an opportunity, some luck to be able to get these

opportunities, and then some stick -to -itiveness when you didn't succeed right

away.

Oh, Ryan, it's more than luck for you. I mean, it's hard work, obviously, andtalent. And I would love to hear about your NHL career. What were some of the

highlights for you? What were some of those moments that you will always take

with

you? We'll never forget.

well geez all of it um there's a there's a big confidence boost and it took me a

while to figure this out is the feeling of belonging so you get an opportunity and

i i would love for kids to hear this no matter where your your skates are your

boots are you belong and you have to play and believe like you belong and i i

didn't when i got to the n right away i remember my first game was it was in a

pressure situation western conference finals with the docs and um we were

playing uh

detroit and that was zetterberg and lidsstrom and chelios and dad's who like big

people big names and so i remember my i think the vein in my neck was like this

and everybody's like you are right man like i sat next to team luselani and Solani

and he was he was at that point in his career it was the furthest he had been in

the playoffs and it was my first NHL game and I was like I don't belong here like

this is team Luselani he's the hall of what am I doing here do not mess this up

for him that was honestly my mental thought that was that was entirely wrong and

that's where I say you got to have good luck that was the wrong mental state to

be in and I went out first shift minus one that was it and i went back and i

said on the bench i looked around i was like this is it this is pretty sweet i

did it i played my n hl game you know and um i got lucky because more followed

it and stuck with it and found away and got more opportunity so um i'll probably

always remember some of those lessons uh remember the first game uh you know

winning

winning anaheim new jersey lost in the finals there uh there is just something

about

a collective group kind of coming together that um that that that sticks with you

for a long time um and um they they really do shape you going forward and

changing

in those moments

it's amazing right too because I love that you brought up that story because I'm

sure Timo Salani was sitting there going, I'm sitting next to Ryan Carter right now.

Yeah.

No, screw it up, kid. Don't screw it up. It's amazing. You know, I want to ask

this too. So what was the process? So you just said, I sat there and you realized

you kind of got a little present with, okay, I did it. Can you dive a little bit

more into that process? Because I'm sure there's a lot of kids out there that get

that negative internal dialogue like and you said you got to you got to feel like

you believe there is that a is that a fake it to you make it approach is it a

choice like how how did you get yourself to a point of consistency with that right

because I think anybody can can I don't mean you so much but I think you know

kids kids can ride that emotional way there's some games you feel like yeah I

belong here and some games you don't so how did you find the consistency inthat

mentality because I believe you to be right. I think that this is a huge part of

success is knowing, not kind of hoping, knowing you belong someplace. Slow

cooker is

the honest truth. Slow cooker because I was never like not almost not until I was

in the NHL. Did I jump or try to skip a grade, so to speak, to be able to be a

better player? I was always able to play in certain roles and be an impact player

at every level I was at until I got to the NHL. And I don't think that I was

mentally prepared for that. I sometimes now, in hindsight, wish I would have set

goals mentally differently. And I think I gave myself a glass ceiling.

So I listened to the people when I was younger, the coaches and everybody I

trusted

that said, you know, make sure you pay attention in school and you do all these

things. Do you have any idea how hard it is to play college hockey? And you're

watching the North Stars, they go away, watching the NHL a little bit on ESPN

growing up. And it was, you have any idea how hard it is to play in the NHL? You

know, a little Ryan fourth grader is saying, what do you want to be when you grew

up? Firefighter, no, police officer, no. Hockey player, yes,

right and it's just be careful because your dreams could be shattered so I always

put the NHL and probably being the best possible version of me kind of on a back

burner didn't know or believe it was true because I was like why could that happen

to me I didn't know I didn't I didn't think about that I didn't believe so I

think if kids hear that if they hear they can be the best you not only can be

great at this game you can actually be the best And I learned this playing with

Marty Roder. He was different. He was built different. He didn't just want to play

in the NHL. He wanted to be the best that ever played in the NHL. And what's

amazing is my brain had never thought that once ever. And I'm not saying I would

have been the best that ever played in the NHL, but I can tell you wholeheartedly,

I had zero chance because I never thought it and I never believed it. And Marty

Broder, he believed it, and he worked for it, and he played for it. And the guy

was not perfect. I scored my first NHL goal against Marty. I go end up playing

against him. And say, hey, Marty, you remember this one? I got my first NBA goal

for it. He goes, nobody. If I ever remembered the first goal that people scored on

me, I'd have nothing else to remember until my memories. And basically what he's

saying is like, I've given up so many goals and so many people have scored on me

that no I don't remember that but I do remember my successes and he just keeps

he

just kept going kept saying give me the net give me the net I want I want I want

I want it he didn't worry about the things that stopped him from getting to where

he wanted to be worried about the things that got him what he wanted which is to

be the best and I never set that goal and any young player would say set the

loftiest goals that you possibly and tell yourself you're the greatest that could

ever play this game because even if you fail at that goal, I think you reach your

floor there is higher than your ceiling if you don't set those goals. Yeah, I mean,that in itself, right? It's just something at every, you know, 15 -year -old in the

world right now, you know, playing a sport can write down in their journal and just

understand that if you don't think you can be it, you just won't. Like, it's just,

it's impossible to get there. And you mentioned a little earlier, you know, you're

doing your, you know, you're in school and you're writing down, like, who might

want

to be? I want to be an hockey player. So I think at some point you probably

didn't write, I want to be a broadcaster and, you know, I want to work with other

students as a mentor. But, you know, in every NHL player has to transition. And

obviously, you've made this transition very successful, you know, from player now

to,

you know, media personality and mentorship coach. Can you just talk a little bit

about, you know, what drove you to go this route? And, you know, what are some

of

the things that enabled you and prepared you for what you're doing right now?

Great question. Did I want to be a broadcaster? No, never. Never even thought

about

it. But here we are. So I don't mean to debunk my last point but you never

dreamed it but hey you know what it came along the way so you found here we are

and it was motivated by fear to not be in the game but the way that I had to

play

was I had to be all in on plan A and so I never accepted plan B and forgive me

if any of the listeners have had this mental thought before but I think it was

after like my first or second year in the NHL because I had left college after two

years I started to take classes again and I was focused on that and getting myself

ready for life after hockey and I was spending time doing that and then one day it

kind of hit me and it was like talking to myself I was like Ryan you you

accepting failure on plan A is leading to your failure at plan a creating a plan B

is going to be the undoing of plan a because you're going to settle for something

like if if I'm wholeheartedly desperate in chasing this out I'll be willing to do

anything to get it because I don't have a second option I have a better opportunity

to getting plan A so I I stopped going back to school and I was like I'm a

hockey player. I'm going to find a way to be a hockey player. And that's the way

it worked for me. And I stuck with that mentality and was able to play on that

for a while, you know, 10 years. And then once I got to 35 and the body was worn

down and it was like, you know what? I've got a family. We can't move around. I've

other things I love more than the game of hockey. It was like, what should I do

now and it was actually scary at 35 I had no idea I remember asking like people

around and people in the business world what are your skills I was like what are

my skills well I can skate good I can shoot I can forecheck and they're like what

do you want to do and I'd be like I want to be 10 years younger and go play

hockey again that's what I want to do and I think just over time being in a

locker room and being the guy that kind of had to be a certain way and a certain

support piece at times helped me be a decent communicator in the locker roomand

through interviews and different things. And that led to when I was done playing,

Minnesota, the Wilde, needed some help in the broadcast booth. And they're like,

hey,

you were always good on these interviews and you were always thoughtful. You

were

always a great teammate. Would you be interested in trying something like this and

trying TV? And I was like, no.

And then I went home and was like, Ryan, this is the same thing like when you

were playing. What would happen if you said no to opportunity when you were

playing?

So I went back and was like, actually, yeah, if it's still there, I'll try it. And

It turns out it's nice to be around the game of hockey. It's all I know. And my

skills are forechecking, shooting, skating, and enjoying the game of hockey being

able

to talk about it. And adding perspective to the game, that is huge.

And as a broadcaster, you can add so much credibility to what you're saying

because

you've been there, you've experienced instead. And I know the audience can

definitely

appreciate that. So, no, that's a gift. Yeah. Thank you.

Thank you. And I'll add on to that. I'm very intrigued. I want to again,

pull the throw on this about plan A versus plan B. Because in the way you just

described it, you're actually still on plan A, right? Now,

kids, and we always joke about this, you don't have to worry about this if you're

young, happens to all of us. At some point, the body can't compete at the level

you want anymore, but your plan A continued plan A in that all of your focus on

the game, and again, we got to say this for the audience. This is whatever you're

obsessed with. This is whatever your dream is, right, whether it's hockey or

something else. Your continued work on that, and I don't know what you were

studying, buddy, at school, open the door for you to continue in this game.

Now, listen, all four of us here on the show are still doing that. So it's amazing

that sticking to plan A, staying involved, staying focused,

the one, everything we've been talking about so far, kids, it will open doors,

parents, it will open doors you never even thought of. You know, Ryan, it's funny.

Again, you and I are the same age. Some of the parallels here freak me out a

little bit because I remember when I was in college, my coach came up to be what

time he says. He goes, I think you're going to be a coach. I see coaching you.

And I went, no, I am a hockey player. I am not a coach. And that is how I'm

most known today is coach. I think more people call me coach than my first name.

So it's one of those things that you don't necessarily need to see the or even

look that far ahead kids you can stay present stay where you're at but i love it

plan a you are still on plan a and i think it's important that everybody hears

that you're not just you're not done with hockey or hockey's not done with youhowever you want to look at it and here you are still on that path right so again

there's not really a question in there but i i wonder if we could just explore

that result because you still love it you're still involved with it again You're,

and this will lead to something we're going to talk about in a minute. You're on

the air with the wild. You're on a podcast talking hockey, and you're a

performance,

you're part of a partner of a performance center in which you're teaching hockey

to

younger kids. So you're still on the path, correct? Yeah, absolutely. You're

absolutely right. And now, full disclosure, I don't want to say everybody should

drop

out of school and chase the passion. So I will say, and I don't mean to pat

myself on the back, I had committed to myself when I decided to stop studying

while

playing that I was going to finish my schooling. And after I got done playing, it

was right away next semester, boom. So I ended up finishing school. And it was

great because I got to graduate. My kids were there and they're like, Dad, your hat

is really funny and your gown looks silly. So the education was important. And I

did have to use some of that and learn some things going back to school and to be

able to apply that to broadcasting. But you're absolutely right. I've found like a

family and I think people will be able to relate to this in the game of hockey

and the people around hockey. And I wanted to be around it. And anybody that has

any type of relationship, you do need to work at it. You need to sacrifice for it.

And It's a two -way street. So me to be in the hockey family, I needed to change

a little bit and work on myself a little bit to be able to stay in and be a

part of the family and stay in communication with the game. And that's something

that was absolutely willing to do and now enjoying that. So I think that's one way

to look at it. Also, right. Oh, go ahead. No, go, Chrissy. I was curious about ETS

performance, too. If you could fill us in on what that does,

how it helps mentor young athletes. And it's over 20 states,

is that correct? That's amazing. Yeah, yeah. It's a sport performance.

And so I started training there at the end of my career. I feel that it gave me

a couple extra years. I'd trained a certain way and Lee were the same age, so

you'd be on the same path where I was a teenager and they're like, you got to

start working out, you know, and it started to enter the game and we would just go

under the bench press and just bench press as much as we could, the squat rack

and

squat as much as we could. And that stuff made us stronger and it had an impact,

but sports science had evolved. And in some ways, halfway through my NHL

career,

I was still kind of stuck mentally doing the things that I was doing as a teenager

because I felt that that's what I needed to do. And then I met Ryan Engelbert and

the guys at ETS. Actually, at that time, it was just Ryan Engelbert and he had

started ETS performance and he had new systems of training and training thebody.

And I jumped in with both feet and felt great. And It gave me a fresh outlook on

the off -season workout. There's an excitement for it. I saw results in my body and

my abilities, even though I was probably on the back nine of my career. I was able

to do things that wasn't able to do when I was younger. And the culture that was

created there was something that I bought into. I enjoyed. I liked being there.

I wanted to be at the gym versus being at the gym looking at my watch, being

like, is it an hour yet? Can I go? And so we had some talks,

Ryan and I and a couple others, and boom, it went to two gyms and then three and

then four and 10, 15, 20, and all in the name of trying to create an environment

for kids where they can not only get better, they're they're comfortable and desire

to be at the culture at the gym working together to be the best version of

themselves then that's the opportunity we're trying to provide some of these

young

athletes and again i get added right just for context when you and i were kids the

standard was six five two 20 six five two 20 you get to the league right and it

is amazing how that has evolved to your point over time like when When you join

the league, things were starting to change, and I'm sure when you left, I mean, if

you put a 1995 NHL player next to a 2025 NHL player,

completely different athletic build, like it would shock you at home,

how different they look. And I love that you brought up the advancements in sports

science because it can really help kids a, above a certain age,

right? I always say kids should not probably be doing anything with weights until

13, 14 years old. You can agree or disagree with me on that. But the good

education on what you can do with your body today will not only help you be

stronger and faster, but it will elongate how long you can do it for, as you said

in the back nine especially.

Yeah, and you're right, Lee, and ETS has the same philosophy. And we do have

programs for kids that are younger than 13 because they have to have body weight

strength and mobility. And the great thing about ETS is that it's not sports

specific. It's not hockey training. And sometimes the whole goal is we're not

training a hockey player. We're training an athlete. So you have to have athletic

movements. And if I go on a filibuster about this, I would say that as a hockey

player, when you're 14 years old, the game is much more, it's less explosive than

it is at the NHL level. And it's less athletic. And the abilities are not quite

there. Those are developed over time. And you have to find ways early on in your

development path to be able to create the create these athletic movements the

explosiveness and all the things that you need and it can't just be i'm a start at

the goal line and i'm going to work on my starts and take six hard strides as

fast as i can right now that's not it all of a sudden you need to be able to go

six hard strides fast stop pivot open your hips go the other way and reach your

stick in a certain spot so you have to create all these strengths and these

mobilities and sometimes I get fearful because kids, you see overuse injury in kids

quite a bit now because they use the same muscle movements and patterns. Andthen

once they're put in an environment where they have to make an athletic move that

they're not used to or because they've gone to the next level and the athletes are

bigger, faster, stronger, they make a move or they extend their body and they're

exposed and they get hurt. And these for me are byproducts of just not training

the

entire body and the athletic movement through their entire range. And ETS

developed

systems to help not a hockey player be a hockey player, but for a kid to be a

good athlete with foundational strength and mobility. And we stand by that

wholeheartedly. And ETS isn't just for a single athlete. We'll have baseball players,

football players, hockey players, volleyball players all in there at the same time

working on custom workouts, but all in the same name being the best athlete in

creating athletic power. I just saw it. Actually, it was a Minnesota Wild social

media post. I think one of your, you know, somebody on the social media team did

like those little free practice interviews with the guys. And they're walking out.

And the question was, if you were more athletic, what sport would you play? And

watching watching and I thought it was the funny when you see the guy's face is

like more athletic like more athletic than an NHL hockey player so I thought it was

I thought it was I thought it was a really great uh you know insight as to the

players like thinking like I am a great athlete that's what I do it so I think

you know you mentioned a little earlier you know the the uh you know us looking at

as athletes and you're and you're working out and you're looking at your watch

and

like oh is it's almost over yet Can you talk a little bit about, you know, not

only ETS and overall philosophy of, you know, training these athletes,

you know, the balance between, you know, hey, you got to put your time in and you

got to make it fun. Like you have to want players and early players,

like seven and eight year olds with functional movement have to love going there,

right? So what are you doing differently or the same that is enticing players to

want to come to work out, want to come to the gym, and, and, and, and, and, and,

and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, you know, Lee says it a

lot, right, that we're hiding the broccoli and the shake a little bit, like, like,

like, hide the good stuff. Like, how are you doing that in your workouts? Yeah,

good question. Um, I, I want to go back to the, the, the, the, the, the, the,

the, we've all heard Brian Burke and it, you, you,

you players believe it's the most athletic sport there is because you have to have

that you've all heard brian berk and you know the whole new mode of

transportation

like no other sport do you have to learn to transport yourself before you start the

motor skills so i think the hockey players if you guys haven't seen it they were

all stumped like how do you get a hockey player stumped asking if they were more

athletic they're like i don't i don't think it can be you know so that um good it

was great but with the The culture at ETS and how to hide it or how to hide thebroccoli, so to speak, I'll give you a quote, and you guys are going to have all

mine by the end of this. I think it's not, and I, for burnout, and I want parents

to hear this too, actually, it's not about the time you put into work. It's about

the work you put into your time. So you have to be there if, like the workout

doesn't have to be three, four hours, like you exhaust your body. go there with

intention and work out and be accountable for your time while you're there.

So when you walk into an ETS gym, you're greeted into a vestibule and you drop

your clothes, you drop your stuff, and then you walk into another spot in the door

closes. Now you're on an island. You are in the gym. The parents aren't there.

Nobody's watching. Nobody's holding you accountable other than yourself you're

being

encouraged by the director and you're you're almost like fitting into the the pack

you see everybody else working out there's dedication and you're like you just

naturally conform to that and that's what ETS is probably secret sauce is just like

they when you walk into that second door it's like a privilege and then boom you're

nobody's watching you like you don't have to do that extra set for mom and dad or

anybody else you do it only for you you do it with the group there because you

see it you're motivated um the music's going the directors are great uh but there's

really a culture of you being you and we use iron sharpens iron on the wall and

um i think that's for me that probably the two biggest things is you don't have to

go work out for three or four hours at the local lifetime gym gym and do all

these things. You can go for 60 minutes, put in great work and be intentional about

it and be in an environment that you like come out of it, feeling positive. And

the kids see results and they're like, mom, dad, we want to go back. We want to

go back. And it's fun to see. Yeah, I think you've hit on it right there. Ryan is

putting them in the right environment, having that right culture. And that can help

develop the right mindset. I'm sure you've seen that as a result.

Yeah, we have. And there's been great demand for the gyms and we get great

feedback

from the athletes on enjoying being there. And there could be more rapid growth

with

more gyms and more locations and helping more kids. But there's a desire to

maintain

a quality of the product and the experience for the athlete to where we're not

willing to sacrifice, hey, let's go massive growth and just pop up new gyms. No,

like we want all the kids to feel these things and to almost have word of mouth

be what drives demand for ETS and the desire for kids to be there.

And I think it's something we take great pride in. Well, I want to say this too,

Ryan, one of the things that you talk about, and this is something we are all

opponent of, not just in the gym, but on the ice, you know, wherever is you're

talking a little bit about the why, the application of this is what we're going to

work on and why. And I think that that is missing heavily at practices. I think

it's missing in the gym. And like you said, you know, I remember Schwarzenegger

hadthis great quote one time about, you know, he's like, when I'm working out my

bicep, I'm in my bicep mentally. And I remember like when you really understand

what

he means by that, you can start to see like he, he is so focused on that muscle

when he's working it, like he's obsessed with it. And there's a why there. He

understands what he's trying to do. So when your kids start getting in the gym,

like Ryan's saying, you know, There's got to be a purpose for being in the gym

that's a little more than just, I want to be strong. Like, that's like me asking

the kids, what do you want to do? We want to win. Everybody wants to win. I've

never had no, I've never said, asked that question. Someone said, I want to lose.

Right. So the purpose and what are we working on and the focus, same thing with

drills and hockey. If you just do the drills and don't explain the application, kids

are just going to do the drills and they're not going to retain much. They're just

going to do it because you them to do it. All right? You tell a kid to do

squats, Ryan, like we had to do a thousand squats, right? Yeah, you're going to do

it. But why are we doing it? What's the application? And I think that that's what

you and your system does so well, is that you explain that. And then the

environment is everything. You know, last night, my son had a game. I'm not a

coach. I've started to step away from coaching my son's team. He's getting older

on

purpose. And, you know, I was asked, well, do you see what he's doing this? Do

you

see what he's doing there? I said, yeah, you should probably work on working on

this. And someone said, why don't you go tell him? I said, I'm not the coach of

the team. I'm not going to go shout over the glass. What he should be doing? Like,

he has to figure this out. If he asks me after, I will gladly tell him.

But that's the other thing, too. I don't even volunteer it. Like, you said it just

rounding this episode out. There's got to be a one. If my kid or any kid is

yearning for that answer, that knowledge, that extra bit, the why. That kid is going

to find success in life. Again, I'm not even just talking hockey. That curiosity is

everything. But Ryan, listen, we're getting a little short on time. I got to ask

you this. You mentioned parents and taking the kids out of the environment where

the

parents are. Let's talk about parents real quick who, you know, volunteer all this

time. They're investing heavily. What is your message to them, right because we're

saying a lot of things of like we got to take your kids into a certain environment

and your kids got to want it and you have very little control over this right

what's your message to the parents of youth hockey players today oh boy yeah

good

no pressure on that by the way yeah hot button issue because it's a it's a love

hey time I am both a hockey parent coach so I'm on both sides of I would say -

How old are your kids just so that we can see if we can relate to where you are

as a hockey parent? 13 -11 -9. Oh, boy. Okay. Yeah.

He's in it now. Yeah. We're in it.I would say like just continue to foster positivity and that goes such a long way.

Like I'll have conversations in the car too where it's uh you know and and

sometimes like i'm a parent too and you know that your kids just have to vent so

-and -so didn't get me the puck did you see that play this and that and the

question is instead like what what what could you have done to make their job a

little bit easier you know or if if you start to see certain patterns in an

individual's play can you adjust to this you know and um I think you can help

foster a solid team effort. It's another thing and super important is your kid won't

and can't be their best unless they are part of like the best that that team can

possibly be. Like high tide raises all ships. So as a parent, you're like, yes,

I'm trying to create a good individual that wants more opportunity and wants the

puck more and wants power play and what's the right way to get it and it's

actually to be the best possible teammate that you can and to realize that I

actually can't score that goal late in the game without the other four or five

people on the ice or without the other teammates that wore the D down and once

parents start to recognize that if they can empower in the conversations in the car

or wherever this might be the team and how important it is to be a member of the

team and that you're not and will never be your best without the best from the

team then uh i think your player starts to understand where priorities lie and it's

not about me it's about us and then they start to figure out how do i help be

better here and uh i think that parents probably need to hear that more it's not

hey you know when you saw this take that puck and go or do this and do that it's

not individual ways it should all be team based and um the other thing i'd say to

parents lastly before i get off this filibuster is probably trust trust the coach i

i i love all these kids equally but they are all different and i'm motivating them

all differently And just because this person, player A, has a different job path

responsibility than player B, I'm trying to teach them something. And I'm

communicating it with them. And they know that. And I'm as a coach,

and I know not all coaches are like this and I'm not pumping my own tire. I'm

accountable. If I say, if you do something, I'll give you what I said, I'll give

view. And with that, we start to see growth in them. But I think you have to

trust the coaches a little bit and trust the process and the path that they're on.

I think you're also giving really great advice to coaches right now. You know, and

I've always said that the biggest threat to a hockey team is actually the coach not

being accountable, as you just said. So I really love that you brought that up

because, you know, Most coaches in the lower half of youth hockey are volunteer

parents. They're doing the best that they can. But you have to be accountable to

your players with what you say, right? Because nothing will destroy a team faster.

Ryan, I hate to say this. We're out of time. We're going to get 100 emails about

you got to get Ryan Carter back on for a second. What happened? I don't know

some

of those inside stories in the NHL. Those are Yeah. Well, Lee, if you would have

shortened the intro, we could have got, we could have gotten more. No, no, no, no.

We don't short the intros for people like you, but you earned every answer to thatintro. But no, Ryan, listen, sincerely, thank you for joining us on this episode

today. You just dropped a lot of gold on here. And again, we always say this

audience is hungry. We talk about the one. This is the audience that wants that

stuff. So thank you so much for bringing it today on this show. Yeah, absolutely. I

appreciate you guys having me. This is fun. And I'm passionate about hockey,

passionate about my kids, passionate about youth hockey. So appreciate you guys

giving

me the opportunity to chat with you guys and learn from you on it too. No, thank

you. And be careful what you wish for, because we are going to get you back on

here. Yes, we will. That's going to do it for this edition of Our Kids Play Hockey

for Ryan Carter, Christie Gashiana Burns and Mike Benoia. I'm Lee Elias.

Remember, if

you have any Email us, team at our kids playhockey .com, or click the link in this

episode accompanied in the description, and you can text us. You put your name

and

where you're from. We love getting questions from you. But that's going to do it,

my friends. Enjoy your hockey. Enjoy your day. We'll see on the next Our Kids Play

Hockey. Take care, everybody. We hope you enjoyed this edition of Our Kids Play

Hockey. Make sure to like and subscribe right now if you found value wherever

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kids playhockey .com. Also, make sure to check out our children's book When

Hockey

Stops at When Hockey Stops .com. It's a book that helps children deal with

adversity

in the game and in life. We're very proud of it. But thanks so much for listening

to this edition of Our Kids Play Hockey and we'll see you on the next episode.