Dec. 14, 2023

The Ride To The Rink - How To Protect Your Mind From Junk For Youth Hockey Players

Today's episode is a game-changer as we navigate the landscape of mental performance with the assistance of Dr. Cassidy Preston. As a mental performance coach and the author of the Amazon bestseller "Mindset First," Cassidy illuminates the significance of shielding our minds from unnecessary distractions, particularly those stemming from social media. He equates harmful mental inputs to junk food, underlining the "input vs output" concept in a way that resonates and makes you rethink your mental diet.

Our conversation doesn't stop there; we probe into the crucial role a positive mindset plays in sports, especially for our young athletes. We share effective strategies to maintain focus, sideline distractions, and how to stay connected to the joy of the game - the 'why' you started playing. We delve into the profound influence parents can have in cultivating a healthy "mental game" in their children. Dr. Preston's insights from his book provide practical tools for athletes to boost their mental performance. Get your notepads ready as this episode is packed with rich insights that promise to enhance your mental game and help you enjoy the journey, be it sports or life.

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00:52 - Protecting Your Mind From Junk

10:31 - Stay Connected to Why You Play

16:09 - Mindset and Book Success

WEBVTT

00:00:08.034 --> 00:00:12.544
Hello hockey skaters and goalies around the world, and welcome to another edition of the ride to the rank.

00:00:12.544 --> 00:00:16.088
It's going to be an extended edition today because we have a really important subject matter.

00:00:16.088 --> 00:00:17.551
I have brought in someone to speak to you.

00:00:17.551 --> 00:00:25.190
A mental performance coach is a good friend of mine, someone that I learn from every single time that I watch him, see him or read him.

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Dr Cassidy Preston enjoys this today and I have to say it right at the top, cassidy, your new book, mindset First, just hit number one on Amazon in its category, which is as your friend.

00:00:36.521 --> 00:00:44.228
I'm excited for you, but I think it says a lot about where we're going as a culture right now that your book about mental performance is number one.

00:00:45.323 --> 00:00:47.064
No, thank you so much, and it's a pleasure to be on.

00:00:47.064 --> 00:00:48.625
It's always fun to connect to your lead.

00:00:49.481 --> 00:01:15.930
Oh, it goes both ways, my friend, and for those of you listening, today we're going to be talking about a really important topic about how to protect your mind from junk, not just on the game days, right, in general, because if you're a young player out there today, there's a lot of distractions between social media, sometimes the things you can see on TV, if you still watch TV, and it's really important, as you written in the book here, cassidy, about your input versus output on game days, on game week, storing the season.

00:01:15.930 --> 00:01:18.768
Can you dive into a little bit about that chapter and why you wrote it?

00:01:19.460 --> 00:01:32.584
Yeah, I think it's such a fundamental way of just looking at, like, what are we doing with our time and energy and our mind particularly, and because we all know our minds so important in the mental game but the input is going to dictate the output.

00:01:32.584 --> 00:01:38.275
And the analogy I like to use is like nutrition it's like your input dictates your output.

00:01:38.275 --> 00:01:57.671
Like you eat healthy, like you're going to have better energy, and so when we look at stats, some social media or a lot of social media, those are like donuts, it's like they're entertainment, right, like you can have a few donuts here and there, but if you're having donuts all day, every day, like what kind of output are you going to get?

00:01:57.671 --> 00:01:59.534
And that's what I call then the mental junk.

00:01:59.534 --> 00:02:03.087
And we need to protect our mind from how much are we consuming?

00:02:03.087 --> 00:02:21.344
Looking at stats online, looking at all this external comparison on social media, these things, when we just feed our mind that generate a mindset that's going to worry about results, consume and feel the weight of the stress and the burden of expectations, et cetera, our confidence gets tied to those things.

00:02:21.344 --> 00:02:25.530
It's not going to allow us to play free confident in the moment.

00:02:25.530 --> 00:02:28.489
So we need to filter and protect our mind from that.

00:02:28.489 --> 00:02:34.760
Some things you can't avoid, then we have to filter, but we definitely some things we can just say no to Like.

00:02:34.760 --> 00:02:40.711
Don't be on social media or TikTok for two hours a day or, and especially, on game days and practice days.

00:02:40.711 --> 00:02:49.929
There's been proven the detrimental for consuming that much social media and those types let alone, it's been proven.

00:02:49.929 --> 00:02:50.480
I was funny.

00:02:50.480 --> 00:02:52.024
I had one guy mention me.

00:02:52.024 --> 00:02:54.889
He's like, oh, my kid stopped doing TikTok on game days.

00:02:54.889 --> 00:02:56.473
Are you thinking it's related?

00:02:56.473 --> 00:02:57.804
I'm like, yeah, that's related.

00:02:57.804 --> 00:03:03.848
So yeah, that's the high level of this input output.

00:03:03.848 --> 00:03:05.864
But there's some other things that that will dive into.

00:03:05.864 --> 00:03:15.950
But yeah, I know I'm glad you picked this because I think it's such an important one that you know how we define success and what we put our attention on really matters.

00:03:16.391 --> 00:03:27.830
Yeah, look, another reason I picked it and again, it's more than just social media, although I loved your, your donut analogy is that I think a lot of times, with this one specifically, even as adults, right, we don't even realize we're doing it.

00:03:27.830 --> 00:03:28.883
You know you get in a click hole.

00:03:28.883 --> 00:03:30.288
It might an hour might have gone by.

00:03:30.288 --> 00:03:32.844
So this is something you know as young athletes.

00:03:32.844 --> 00:03:35.510
Those of you listening really got to be aware of this.

00:03:35.510 --> 00:03:38.801
Cassie, I do want to dive in a little bit, though it's like you know.

00:03:38.801 --> 00:03:50.365
Look, we talk about donuts like McDonald's on game days, right, yeah, the smart player knows probably shouldn't do that, but we know why, with the donut and the McDonald's, it does not have the nutrition you need to be at your best.

00:03:50.365 --> 00:03:57.525
Can we maybe talk about the aspects of TikTok, instagram, social media, snapchat that make it unhealthy for your brain?

00:03:57.525 --> 00:04:05.022
And again, I'm looking at the book while I'm saying this, because you talk a lot about being in control and how it can take your focus away, productivity, it away.

00:04:05.022 --> 00:04:06.419
Can you dive into that for me?

00:04:06.419 --> 00:04:07.699
Like, why are they unhealthy?

00:04:08.314 --> 00:04:20.101
Yeah, and I'll loop in there, because, especially with parents and you talk about the parents impact, because, again, I do it like I don't have Instagram on my phone because it's just too easily accessible Like I go on it on like an iPad.

00:04:20.101 --> 00:04:32.100
But and I'll loop in quick too, the stats online, right, parents are often maybe the kids aren't looking, but the parents are and then they're having the conversation with the kid and that's the input.

00:04:32.100 --> 00:04:33.802
If you win today, you can rank here.

00:04:33.802 --> 00:04:41.160
If you do this, you'll be yeah, it's dangerous oh man like, oh, you got this many points, so you're like it's like no, no, no, that's you're putting in the wrong inputs.

00:04:41.160 --> 00:04:51.242
And with all of those things and with the social media, there's a bunch of different challenges that come up from it, one of which is the constant external comparison.

00:04:51.242 --> 00:05:03.439
Right, you're constantly looking outwards and looking outwards then for validation and the feelings of meaning and internal happiness, that kind of like.

00:05:03.439 --> 00:05:16.463
It's a very flawed way to look and like find meaning in life, like it's really important to spend time with your own thoughts, find things that create real meaning and connection, not this, you know, online.

00:05:16.463 --> 00:05:23.204
Now, I'm not saying the online world's bad because, like we, I work with a lot of athletes, our team does, and they're gonna be on social media.

00:05:23.204 --> 00:05:27.363
It is how they connect and it's not inherently a bad way to connect.

00:05:27.363 --> 00:05:29.963
But again, how much and in which way?

00:05:29.963 --> 00:05:31.038
And is there other ways?

00:05:31.038 --> 00:05:34.702
Especially on game days and practice days and how much of it?

00:05:34.702 --> 00:05:51.680
Where, if you wanna be priming your mind to perform, and we got them doing imagery, we got them doing naps or meditation you got them, like you know, maybe doing a little game day film or something you know, doing a walk or some light activity to relax, something to get you present right.

00:05:51.680 --> 00:05:54.098
Yeah, to get you present these things, you do those things.

00:05:54.098 --> 00:06:03.425
But then you do two hours of TikTok Like, oh, it's like, and use the food analogy oh, ate my chicken, rice and salad.

00:06:03.425 --> 00:06:08.899
And then you had three donuts for dessert, like, oh, just ruined the good meal you had stomach the whole time.

00:06:08.899 --> 00:06:10.761
Yeah, so it's like it's.

00:06:10.761 --> 00:06:14.882
So that's a good way to look at it and the why.

00:06:14.882 --> 00:06:22.223
One of the other big things with social media again I'm picking on TikTok, but it's you know, instagram's pretty much just adopted TikTok with the reels and the sun.

00:06:22.223 --> 00:06:34.839
It's just a delayed factor, but it's that you know every seven seconds, the swipe mentality, where you're just constantly searching for to be entertained at a really short, you know, attention span.

00:06:34.839 --> 00:06:48.225
That like you need to have to be able to be present for longer periods of time and to be able to navigate through the emotions and distractions throughout a game, versus constantly being distracted and like swiping a hundred.

00:06:48.225 --> 00:06:49.218
Like it's.

00:06:49.218 --> 00:06:50.281
So it's proven.

00:06:50.281 --> 00:07:05.836
Like there's great research that highlights that increased social media and some of those effects around mental illness disorders like depression, anxiety, et cetera, when you're consuming too much of the social media, so especially after you've completed some of the main reasons.

00:07:05.836 --> 00:07:07.723
Yeah, it can get very toxic pretty quick.

00:07:07.975 --> 00:07:12.302
Yeah, I was just saying like everybody's feeds a little bit different, but it can become a pretty dark place.

00:07:12.302 --> 00:07:20.485
So I just want to reiterate Cassidy is not saying no social media ever, but we are saying, you know, on a game day you might want to rethink your strategies here.

00:07:20.485 --> 00:07:25.475
I think another thing too not to keep it on social media, but the idea, like you said.

00:07:25.475 --> 00:07:35.536
You know, when we were kids, the equivalent to me of this would have been like being on the phone with someone all the way up to the time it's to go on the ice, like we would never do that right.

00:07:35.536 --> 00:07:36.439
Cause it would be distracted.

00:07:36.439 --> 00:07:38.814
You needed your time to get focused, to be ready for the game.

00:07:38.814 --> 00:07:48.678
You also give a really great case study in this chapter of a player you've worked with, zach, who played AAA, and how he was up against it going into the second half of the season.

00:07:48.678 --> 00:07:50.735
I'm just looking at it here, but you helped him.

00:07:50.735 --> 00:07:51.800
I'm just I'm gonna read it.

00:07:51.800 --> 00:08:03.338
He did a personal scorecard, redefined his own definition of success and then what I loved is that you know, when we look at the results of this case study, it wasn't first like, oh, I had so many more points and six no, it's.

00:08:03.338 --> 00:08:11.458
I was able to reconnect to the love of the game and my mindset improved, which really is an aura of the entire book and your body of work.

00:08:11.458 --> 00:08:15.180
Right that you got to reconnect with that side of the game.

00:08:15.180 --> 00:08:24.932
And then social media or some of these distractions stats, standings can really take you out of a place where you're forgetting why you're, why you played the game in the first place.

00:08:25.514 --> 00:08:27.855
Yeah, and that's, and I'll leave it into.

00:08:27.855 --> 00:08:38.818
So there's what not to do and then there's what to do, and one of those big things I alluded to it was imagery, and one of the key things we do in imagery is often have them reconnect to why they play the game in the first place.

00:08:38.818 --> 00:08:42.820
And a great way to look at that is it's not like a list.

00:08:42.820 --> 00:08:44.576
Well, here's the reasons I play.

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No one of the best ways to do it is a story.

00:08:47.477 --> 00:08:51.653
And so go back to when did you first fall in love with the game?

00:08:51.653 --> 00:08:56.275
In and of itself, and when you can get reconnected to that, it's a feeling that comes out.

00:08:56.275 --> 00:08:58.758
And so there's the external goals.

00:08:58.758 --> 00:08:59.793
Those changed over time.

00:08:59.793 --> 00:09:00.576
As you climb the ranks.

00:09:00.576 --> 00:09:01.077
Those change.

00:09:01.077 --> 00:09:04.058
But the internal, why that feeling of the joy of the game?

00:09:04.058 --> 00:09:07.416
There's an initial spark, and so we get players in their imagery.

00:09:07.416 --> 00:09:09.918
Go back to when you were six or eight or 10.

00:09:09.918 --> 00:09:15.038
And when you first fell in love, and remember that for 15 seconds and you get reconnected to that.

00:09:15.038 --> 00:09:18.580
That's a simple little thing that can go a long way.

00:09:18.580 --> 00:09:26.759
That's the healthy input, right, that's your meat and potatoes or steak and whatever your pregame meal is, but the healthy inputs.

00:09:27.110 --> 00:09:28.816
It's not the donuts, yeah, yeah, not the donuts.

00:09:28.836 --> 00:09:35.275
It's definitely not the donuts and yeah, so it's a great way to look at it and a lot of people.

00:09:35.275 --> 00:09:38.437
I'll share the story because a lot of people find it very helpful.

00:09:38.437 --> 00:09:47.274
It's a variation of John DeMartini I shared in one of the earlier chapters or maybe it was this chapter, but just around we lose sight of the why and a lot of people.

00:09:47.274 --> 00:10:03.611
I use this analogy of a 105 year old lady who's the matriarch of her community and she's got this flower bed on either end of her backyard and these 12 year old boys love going to play football there because they throw the football and catch it in a nice soft flower bed, so they love it.

00:10:03.611 --> 00:10:05.615
Old ladies losing their minds.

00:10:05.615 --> 00:10:07.256
She's like these kids, what are you doing?

00:10:07.256 --> 00:10:09.017
You ruin my flowers, stop playing.

00:10:09.017 --> 00:10:11.056
They're like screw you, we're gonna keep playing.

00:10:11.056 --> 00:10:13.436
And so she's like, oh, what am I gonna do?

00:10:13.436 --> 00:10:14.894
She's like I'll call the cops.

00:10:14.894 --> 00:10:16.614
Like, nah, I can't call the cops.

00:10:16.614 --> 00:10:17.376
They're 12 years old.

00:10:17.376 --> 00:10:20.861
So she gets sneaky and she starts to pay them to play.

00:10:20.861 --> 00:10:22.971
The kids are like this is sick.

00:10:22.971 --> 00:10:23.385
We're not only.

00:10:23.385 --> 00:10:24.672
We get to play this game we love.

00:10:24.672 --> 00:10:27.792
We're getting five bucks every week to come play in this ladies backyard.

00:10:27.792 --> 00:10:28.868
This is going great.

00:10:28.868 --> 00:10:34.635
And then she starts to pay them less and it goes down to $3, $2, $1, 50 cents a quarter.

00:10:34.635 --> 00:10:36.892
The kids are like, screw this, we're not playing anymore.

00:10:36.892 --> 00:10:40.133
They lost sight of why they were playing the first place.

00:10:40.133 --> 00:10:46.952
And that's the same, for I see this with 12 year olds, 15 year olds, let alone seven like you guys climbing the ranks, girls climbing the ranks.

00:10:46.952 --> 00:10:51.731
They lose sight of why, right, they think the goal and the external things are their.

00:10:51.731 --> 00:10:51.932
Why?

00:10:51.932 --> 00:10:54.787
No, those are external goals, right, and intentions.

00:10:54.787 --> 00:10:57.229
There's nothing wrong with those, but don't make that your core.

00:10:57.229 --> 00:10:59.571
Why, unless they connected to that level of the game?

00:10:59.571 --> 00:11:01.169
And again, that input matters.

00:11:01.169 --> 00:11:13.051
Are you putting input that feeds the engine that focuses on all the results and the external comparison, or are you putting an input that keeps you grounded in the level of the game, the mindset and who you want to be and how you want to show up?

00:11:13.051 --> 00:11:19.049
And so that flower bed story, that helps, because that separation of, well, my why is external things?

00:11:19.049 --> 00:11:23.028
No, it's not Like that's an external goal, your true why?

00:11:23.028 --> 00:11:23.831
Your intrinsic one.

00:11:23.831 --> 00:11:24.493
You have one.

00:11:24.493 --> 00:11:28.312
A lot of us lose sight of it, so staying connected to that is very powerful.

00:11:28.985 --> 00:11:40.950
Well, look, and I think that's great advice, whether you're six or 26, right, and you know, I think it's also important to remember, no matter where you're at on the journey, that if you're not sure you're feeling that, why right now you can get that back.

00:11:40.950 --> 00:11:45.711
I mean, that's something that where I'm at, cassie, I mean, I reconnect with that all the time.

00:11:45.711 --> 00:11:55.409
Probably easier now at my age than it was maybe in my 20s, but for those young kids listening, you know, that's kind of like a superpower for you, right, like you love to play.

00:11:55.409 --> 00:11:58.672
And parents, if you're listening, you play a huge role in that right.

00:11:58.672 --> 00:12:06.451
One of the things, cassie, I say to my son and daughter before they take the ice every single time is two things no matter what happens out there, I'm going to love you.

00:12:06.451 --> 00:12:10.394
And then I think also as important, I love watching you play.

00:12:10.394 --> 00:12:21.654
I love watching you play, and it's so important that you never lose sight of that but also are, as Cassie said, aware of the things that can infiltrate your ability to do that.

00:12:21.654 --> 00:12:27.085
And again I want to reiterate we're not saying social media is evil and don't ever go on social media.

00:12:27.085 --> 00:12:32.144
That's a choice everyone's got to make on their own, but, like most things, it's a dessert, right.

00:12:32.144 --> 00:12:40.304
You cannot eat dessert three meals a day and expect really good outcomes with that right and finding the ways to be confident.

00:12:40.304 --> 00:12:46.404
Again, referencing the pages here, the inputs of focus, resilience, composure, confidence, those are things that get you in the zone right.

00:12:46.404 --> 00:12:47.543
Those are the things that you want to have.

00:12:47.543 --> 00:12:51.961
And look, I can't say enough good things about this book for the parents and the kids.

00:12:51.961 --> 00:12:53.048
Listening Mindset first.

00:12:53.048 --> 00:12:55.335
Again, it's available everywhere, right?

00:12:55.335 --> 00:13:01.326
Amazon, dr Cassidy, pressoncom, and you know, cassie, we're going to have you back on again Again.

00:13:01.326 --> 00:13:10.445
Cassie also runs something called CEP Mindset, in which he works with young athletes to get them well, not just focus that wouldn't be enough but to really help them work on this side of their game.

00:13:10.445 --> 00:13:21.424
Because, as we both live in this realm, cassidy, that you know what you got to do physically to get your body in shape mentally, you have to be able to work at it just as much.

00:13:21.424 --> 00:13:33.592
And again, I said this to you before the show, I'm going to say it to the whole audience I wish I had this book, specifically this book, when I was a young player, because the tools that you have written in here would have deeply impacted the way I approached the game.

00:13:33.592 --> 00:13:36.051
So thank you for writing it number one.

00:13:36.653 --> 00:13:56.293
Thank you All right and again go ahead my bad, yeah, and I'll just say like, yeah, and that's why I wrote the book, like, because my home personal struggles as a hockey player and that's why I got into the work that I get to do now is there's got to be a better way, right, there's got to be a faster way to work on the mindset in the mental game that's practical and personalized.

00:13:56.293 --> 00:14:11.491
And so it's now condensing it all into this pretty, you know, concise, yet very practical book that athletes can dive into, engage and get a lot out of, you know, at their own speed, their own time and comfort of wherever they want to read that book.

00:14:11.491 --> 00:14:29.417
So, and I'll add in one quick thing too around the why, but the players, but also the parents and you highlighted it really well, there you're like, you know, you're like I'm here, I love watching you play, right, like that's your why, you stay connected to that, whereas a lot of parents, they forget their why and their why is like Do better on the four check today?

00:14:29.417 --> 00:14:33.413
Yeah, yeah, as like they're happy when their kid performs well.

00:14:33.413 --> 00:14:35.071
Or why are we focusing on mindset?

00:14:35.071 --> 00:14:35.913
Or why are we not on this?

00:14:35.913 --> 00:14:40.354
Because I want to see you do better results, and then their why is so connected to the results too?

00:14:40.354 --> 00:14:43.312
And so, as a and then, what does that do to the athlete?

00:14:43.312 --> 00:14:43.594
Right?

00:14:43.634 --> 00:14:43.975
you're right.

00:14:44.144 --> 00:14:45.250
Makes them stay connected to the results.

00:14:45.250 --> 00:14:48.654
And so, you know, the words you say impact them.

00:14:48.654 --> 00:14:55.216
But it also helps set your own tone, which then you know, just you know, imparts onto them.

00:14:55.216 --> 00:15:00.573
Like you know, they pick up on your body language, the tone, the way you say things, not just the words.

00:15:00.573 --> 00:15:03.595
So it's so, it's a good reflection.

00:15:03.595 --> 00:15:05.110
I'm glad you brought that up as well.

00:15:05.365 --> 00:15:06.650
No, it's my pleasure.

00:15:06.650 --> 00:15:09.105
And again, look, we all preach this right.

00:15:09.105 --> 00:15:18.073
It's about focusing on what you can control and I think what's great about your book here is that this is a great starting point to kind of understand that methodology and philosophy.

00:15:18.073 --> 00:15:22.432
And again, you go into some great things in here, including, like I love, the chapter on the game day prep.

00:15:22.432 --> 00:15:24.508
We're going to probably share that with the audience in the future.

00:15:24.508 --> 00:15:29.892
Just reading through that, I was like, yeah, yeah, I needed this 30 years ago.

00:15:29.892 --> 00:15:37.291
But mindset first is available now again wherever, I'm guessing, wherever books can be sold Again number one on Amazon right away.

00:15:37.291 --> 00:15:39.236
Man, that's an accomplishment, congratulations on it.

00:15:39.845 --> 00:15:40.909
Yeah, thank you so much.

00:15:40.909 --> 00:15:45.591
I appreciate being on and love the work you're doing, and it's always, always a pleasure to catch up, lee.

00:15:46.013 --> 00:15:46.534
Thank you, man.

00:15:46.534 --> 00:15:49.995
All right, so this has been Dr Cassidy Preston with Leo Elias on the ride to the rink.

00:15:49.995 --> 00:15:52.413
Wherever you're playing this week, we wish you the best.

00:15:52.413 --> 00:15:57.409
Remember to have a great time, have fun, remember why you love the game and, as always, skate on.

00:15:57.409 --> 00:16:01.673
Ok, I fly.