The Ride To The Rink: The Importance of Respectful Communication with Your Coaches

Mike Bonelli [0:08 - 4:01]: Okay. I hope you're on your way to practice. I hope you're on your way to a game. I hope you're in a place coming up soon where you're going to interact with your coach and there's some strategies. I want you to think about how you can really make an impact with your coach for the rest of the season from today's interaction for the rest of the year. A couple of things that I love as a coach is making sure that players are engaged. That when you're in the locker room, you're on the bench. And one of the coaches, I don't care if he's a head coach, assistant coach, goalie coach, volunteer coach, that adult and that person that's helping you and having a conversation with you and giving you, you know, maybe. Maybe it's negative feedback, maybe it's positive feedback. Whatever it is, what you can do as a player to help show that you're invested in learning and invested in being a better player is to really look at that coach in the eyes. Concentrate on watching what that coach is saying, making sure you're not speaking when they're speaking, and just have a really good attitude, even if you have to fake it a little bit, that you're listening and learning and understanding that this coach is having a conversation with you for one reason or another. It might be that they're really mad and they're upset at the way you're playing. It could be that they love what you're doing and they love how you're reacting to a situation, or it could be just, you know, they want to give you a little bit of advice on, you know, where they see what you're doing and then what you could do better and what you can improve on. But one of the great qualities of a player with coaches at every level is having the ability to look them in the eye and really engage with that adult, because that's how adults react. If you're going to put your head down, if you're going to look at your phone, if you're going to roll your eyes, if you're going to be in a situation where you actively look like you don't care about what that coach is saying and the kind of feedback that coach is giving you, whether you're sitting on the bench in the middle of a game or you're at the blue line during a practice and you're in a drill and that coach pulls you aside, really get into a great habit of looking right in that coach's eyes might be uncomfortable at first and it's going to be a little awkward. And I'm sure sometimes a coach is going to be like, you know, this person's really paying attention to me. I've got to up my game here and make sure they're really listening. And because they, I can tell they value what I'm saying to them and I can tell they are that that player wants me to give them instruction, wants me to coach them up. I think that's one of the really most impressive pieces about working with kids and players is that you get to really see if you're making an impact. And I know me as a coach, I loved it when players showed me that they were paying attention, showed me that they cared, showed me that they wanted to learn and really showed me that they were mature enough to be in a room on the ice or on the bench, in the locker room, in the hallway, that they understood that I was giving my time for them, that I was making sure that I wanted to be in a great place for them to improve and that I have a resource which hopefully you feel and respect most all your coaches, that they are giving you a resource of learning and understanding the game that you can really find value in. So again, when you get to the rank, when you're in practice, when that coach is speaking to you, it might be a pregame speech, a pre practice speech. It might be a time when they pull you aside on the blue line to talk to you in a drill, really get in the habit of looking in that coach's eyes, paying attention, showing that you acknowledge the coach. You don't have to kiss their butt and you don't have to be overly excited about it. But you do help yourself by giving yourself a chance to show that coach that you care, that they care and that you're willing to listen to them and learn. So hopefully that helps a little bit, and I'd love to hear your feedback on how that worked at your next practice or game.