Jan. 20, 2024

When Is It Worth Driving An Hour For Youth Hockey?

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Season 1 Our Kids Play Hockey

This week's episode of Our Kids Play Hockey covers a few topics sent into us asking about travel time and how you know its too much, and the correct way to solve some team-level discipline issues!

Tune in as Lee, Christie, and Mike share their expertise and experience with both questions. They truly are the "Dear Abby" of the youth hockey world!

We love to help answer your questions, so be sure to send them to team@ourkidsplayhockey.com or submit them via the contact page on OurKidsPlayHockey.com to have them answered on a future episode of Our Kids Play Hockey!

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00:51 - Choosing Between Local and Higher-Level Hockey Teams

11:01 - Considerations for Choosing a Hockey Team

21:17 - Considerations for Youth Hockey Development

29:13 - Driving's Impact on Quality of Life

34:13 - Accountability in Youth Hockey Coaching

48:09 - Communication and Expectations in Coaching

59:38 - Our Kids Play Hockey Mailbag Episode

WEBVTT

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Hey everybody, welcome to this edition of our kids play hockey, powered by NHL Sensorina.

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It's a mailbag episode where we had a couple people email in some really important topics.

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One we have a parent whose kid is traveling three hours a day or three hours of practice day, I should say to play for a team and he wanted to know that there's a local team in town.

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Should he have his kid played for that team?

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We know it's a common issue in hockey incredible amounts of travel when there's lots of organizations potentially available.

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So we have a very lively discussion about that.

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And the second email we got is about a young man who's playing for a team where the coach is called Mr Discipline and the coach basically from the emailer doesn't follow his own rules and he wanted our thoughts on how he should deal with that and, as you can imagine, we had another wonderful conversation on that one.

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So it's a mailbag episode.

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Make sure you listen to that.

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Make sure you check out our sponsor, nhl Sensorina.

00:00:59.390 --> 00:01:04.584
You get $50 off an annual subscription if you head over to their website, censorinacom.

00:01:04.584 --> 00:01:18.227
It is a wonderful platform for your kids to practice hockey off the ice in a virtual reality environment and what they have done is allowed you to make sure that you're practicing some of the things that coaches can't get to on the ice vision scanning.

00:01:18.227 --> 00:01:24.469
If you're a goalie, obviously there's an entire goal-tending platform on there for you to work on your glove, your blocker, to warm up for games.

00:01:24.469 --> 00:01:31.768
I know a lot of goalies from the NHL level down that use this to warm up for games, but it's a really great platform and it is a really immersive platform.

00:01:31.768 --> 00:01:33.314
I have used it myself.

00:01:33.314 --> 00:01:35.564
You're gonna see me using it across our channels here soon.

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It's an exciting technology in a way to advance your training as hockey players.

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So check that out again.

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$50 off an annual subscription censorinacom.

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Kick the hockey player side of it or the hockey goalie side of it, you'll be right in.

00:01:48.968 --> 00:01:53.246
But let's get right into this episode of our kids play hockey powered by censorina right now.

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Hello hockey friends and families around the world, and welcome to another edition of our kids play hockey powered by NHL censorina.

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I'm Leo Elias and I'm joined by my favorite line mates in the world.

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They really are not any better.

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I don't know if I'm the center or Mike.

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Maybe you'd probably be the center and Christie would be the wing.

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I'd be a wing, but I'm with my favorite line mates, mike Monelling and Christie Cascio, to burn today.

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I thought it was the rose between the two thorns.

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But what do I know?

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You can be the center.

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I you know, christie, you're the center of the head coach.

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I got you know what?

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You're the player coach on the team, all right.

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So you're playing center, you're taking the face offs and Mike are coming into it.

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We're gonna get that puck.

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Okay, we're gonna go down there and score.

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Enough of the hockey metaphors.

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Now, friends, today's episode is a mail back, using your work and you use them, I guess.

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Right, that's very fair, right?

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We've gotten a lot of emails over the last few weeks and months, actually from all of you out there in hockey land asking some really great questions about the game and situations that your kids are in.

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So we're gonna answer at least one of those emails today.

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So I'm gonna read the email and then we're gonna discuss it, and these are really great questions, or I should say, thought-provoking questions that are gonna get us going.

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So, christie, mike, are you ready for the first email?

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let's dive in let's dive in.

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I love it all right.

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So this one's from Chris.

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His kid is a 2012 and he says my son is on a high level team this year.

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However, the commute is very difficult.

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The coach is great, the team is great and he loves it.

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However, he is feeling the pressure and stress of being in the car for more than three hours daily to practice back and forth.

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I know there's a lot of people listening that can relate to that.

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Each commute is at least an hour and a half each way.

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Locally there is a great coach who has a high IQ style of coaching, but the team is nowhere near as good as his current team.

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He skates with the local coach and really likes that coach, but he knows the team is not up to the level he's been playing at and he's nervous that his game might suffer by playing with and against lesser competition.

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If we stay local, he would be able to do multiple skates a week instead of being in the car and be able to balance schoolwork as well.

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What do you think would be best for my player in this position?

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It's a really great question.

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Who wants to?

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I think you really gotta know your kid.

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I mean, it depends on your kid.

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Alright, I go to two ways here now.

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When Sophia decided she wanted to play a higher at a higher level, which meant we had to go to the triple-a team more rides, longer rides in the car or farther to travel for games, for other practices and all that, but she could handle it, she was good, it wasn't stressful for her.

00:04:34.206 --> 00:04:39.488
She really adapted well and learned how to manage her time with the rule.

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And now my husband's chiming in, he's here with us guys.

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His rule was if your grades start to suffer, if your school work, if you start failing because of hockey, done, yeah, you're done.

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If it puts too much stress on you and you're not doing a great job managing that stress, hockey is done, you're done.

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Now, she was very good at it and it actually helped her in college balance because you know it was like having two jobs, obviously, when you're playing hockey and going to college and managing all that working.

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So she was really good at that because she had that life experience of figuring out how to do it.

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If your kid isn't good at that, then I wouldn't put all that extra stress on them and I wouldn't allow their grades to suffer for it.

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So it really depends on your kid.

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That's my answer.

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I think it's important.

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My I sure agree that all three of us would agree that look this, the education is the primary thing, and I think even the parent writing it's like if the school grades are going down it, this is an easy decision.

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Right this, the education has to come first.

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So I think we should just at least set that standard from the three of us the high bar, yeah, yeah go ahead, mike, I'm sorry, can you, yeah, can you manage school and this other activity, whether it's tennis or you know, question in or high-level swimming or archery?

00:06:10.043 --> 00:06:32.425
hockey right, I mean whatever it is, whatever your, I mean you know, I think hockey always gets a bad rap, that it's like oh my god, if you play hockey you're giving up a go, listen, any any sport where you need to dedicate your time, you probably are gonna have to travel somewhere or you're gonna have to make some kind of sacrifice by leaving you know a day or two early to go to different tournaments, I mean.

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So I I'm not a big fan of the hockey getting the bad rap all the time because I've seen it in every sport where I am now.

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That being said, I think at 12, there there's a, there's a, there's a, really so.

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So I've wavered on this a lot because of the, because I've seen it, because of where we are in the Northeast and specifically where I am in, like the tri-state, and we call it the tri-state.

00:06:55.482 --> 00:06:58.819
Nobody else can really say tri-state because this is New York, right?

00:06:58.819 --> 00:07:07.899
So we have New York, connecticut, you know, and you have Jersey and you have, and there's a lot of hockey, I mean there's a lot of T, hundreds and hundreds of teams.

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So I always, I always say no, can you look in, can you look into the future a little bit and say, well, if, where is my player going to be in four years?

00:07:18.411 --> 00:07:18.951
Anyway?

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Like, who is the player is?

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Is the?

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Could that player play on the lesser team, whether a bigger fish, where they're getting a lot more ice time, where, because of the end game is to play at a higher level?

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You know, quote, unquote but the higher level might be your local team, then be in that area quicker.

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I know that's the way I look at it.

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I look at it as be the best player.

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This, you've got to be the best player on that team by far before you need to say I need to go to another program an hour and a half away.

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That's how I see it.

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I mean, if you're gonna go to another program because the team is better, an hour and a half away and three hours a night and you're a third-line player, you're not getting.

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You know you like this is the.

00:08:05.346 --> 00:08:12.081
This is the debate I have with mom and dad's all the time like, well, my kid didn't make the top team, so we're leaving to go to this other team.

00:08:12.081 --> 00:08:14.228
Yeah, but what do you do?

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What are you getting from the other team?

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Like, are you getting better?

00:08:17.663 --> 00:08:20.074
No, so you're, you're following.

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So what you're doing is you're not changing the path, they're not changing the system.

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You're just following along like everyone else, like a sheep, like you, just like, and you.

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And then you're wondering why you're not catching up.

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So if you have a chance to go to this nice coach good hockey IQ.

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On advice, take those three-hour resources.

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I mean, you're probably spending you know, 80 90 dollars in gas a day.

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It sounds like to me.

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So go, take those resources, put them into other things, put them into off ice development get an NHL sensorina now.

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I'm sorry I had to say it was sitting there for me, that put it in the set put it put it in the virtual reality put get by a by a shooting board, like there's so many things you can do with that three hours right outside of running to another rank an hour and a half away to get no more than what you're getting where you're at now.

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If it means, if it means you get it an extra a on your jersey.

00:09:14.586 --> 00:09:19.700
If it means I don't know, I don't see any upside to it.

00:09:19.700 --> 00:09:21.267
Personally, I look at it, I go.

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How, how, how do we make these decisions and how do we constantly allow teams to pick kids and you have to go past nine, ten different other teams that you couldn't either like.

00:09:33.169 --> 00:09:34.836
So I don't know.

00:09:34.836 --> 00:09:38.687
I'm always stay local, be the best player in your community first.

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Be in a place where the your own coaches like this and you gotta get out of here.

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Buddy, like this is just not helping you week, because I, because I truly believe if you're in that community by you, it's a funny thing about hockey once you stay, other kids will stay and then like I joke around all the time.

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Where I see people here, I'm like you know, if all six of you people that hated the local program stayed, you'd be the best program.

00:10:02.953 --> 00:10:06.852
Like six of you and we're in six different you know, like where I am.

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You're at the Hitman, you're at the Avalanche, you're at mid Fairfield, you're at CJR they're all from the same town.

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I go.

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If you all stayed in this town, you'd be better than the teams you're leaving to go play for.

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So what the hell are you doing?

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Like so, and that's how I look at it all the time.

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I just get to the best place you can be for your kid's mental health, your mental health, and then he can go nuts.

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You wanna go to the rink?

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It's five minutes away.

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Go every day.

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You wanna go?

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You wanna be that player?

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Five minutes away?

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I'll bring you every single day.

00:10:40.769 --> 00:10:58.836
Right, and I guarantee you he's gonna get a lot of ice time and you're gonna see his creativity out there soar, which is something that coaches always look for just how creative is that player and how much ice time are there and he's gonna build his hockey IQ.

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You're gonna see that.

00:11:00.690 --> 00:11:02.938
I mean what skill you're getting by traveling now.

00:11:02.938 --> 00:11:05.133
I mean to be a highway superintendent or something someday.

00:11:05.133 --> 00:11:07.736
I mean, like, what are you gaining by being in the car?

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an hour and a half.

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I don't know.

00:11:10.970 --> 00:11:14.918
The only other thing I can say is it did for Sophia's case anyway.

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It was good for her, because it did build that good foundation of learning how to balance everything, so she got great experience by being on a travel team.

00:11:25.761 --> 00:11:27.493
It wasn't that far.

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It wasn't three hours away, though.

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He didn't have to travel farther for the games.

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And understanding who you are too, chrissy, you're in a rural community, I mean, you're not in a place where there's 17 teams that you can choose from no, no, there's not, especially with girls.

00:11:44.649 --> 00:11:46.457
Yeah, well, and that even makes it harder, right?

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So depending on where you're from, it just makes it harder.

00:11:50.235 --> 00:12:05.279
But like I'm just speaking from my perspective, where we are in New York and Fairfield County and Westchester and Suffolk, and like there's zero reason to go an hour and a half to go to a team, unless, of course, the other six kids on your team went there.

00:12:05.279 --> 00:12:09.756
I don't know, but there's not a lot of reasons at 12 years old to do that, in my opinion.

00:12:10.370 --> 00:12:11.315
Yeah, I agree with you.

00:12:11.450 --> 00:12:17.039
If you live in Arizona, especially if your kid is stressing, that's it, and that's connecting.

00:12:17.690 --> 00:12:18.784
Why are you trying to get?

00:12:18.806 --> 00:12:19.068
at your kid.

00:12:19.068 --> 00:12:22.134
Well, I'll tell you a few things that I wrote back to this person.

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One is that as an actionable item, because in the way the email is written it sounds like, well, if the kid is stressing that, I mean you kind of have your answer there a little bit.

00:12:31.030 --> 00:12:31.955
It's right there, yeah.

00:12:32.691 --> 00:12:36.000
But I also said listen, things you can do, parents, everybody listening.

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Things you can do when you have to make a tough decision and this is one that actually my father used to do with me and it's so effective and it kind of shows you the answer pretty quickly.

00:12:45.278 --> 00:12:49.120
Write a list of positive and negatives of both places.

00:12:49.120 --> 00:12:50.553
Even just that exercise.

00:12:50.553 --> 00:13:01.158
Working through it, you're gonna know most of the time rather quickly what the right decision is or what I shouldn't say the right, which way you wanna lean, okay, and someone goes what if it's a tie?

00:13:01.158 --> 00:13:04.152
Then you pick the easier one for yourself if you need to.

00:13:04.152 --> 00:13:07.692
So I think that's one actionable item Writing notes here.

00:13:07.692 --> 00:13:15.777
Guys, there's a higher thing here that we've talked about on the show before, but I almost wanna ask you guys if we can even find a percentage balance.

00:13:16.509 --> 00:13:20.000
But I've always said this your kid succeeding.

00:13:20.000 --> 00:13:27.053
I think there is so much more on their drive to succeed than where they're playing.

00:13:27.053 --> 00:13:33.677
Now, look, I'm not saying someone can have a massive drive, be playing at a very low level and really get far in the game.

00:13:33.677 --> 00:13:34.644
That's not what I'm saying.

00:13:34.644 --> 00:13:51.355
I'm saying but if your kid is extremely passionate about this game and wants to practice, no matter where they're playing, and that's what I'm trying to say is that, whether you're an hour and a half away or five minutes away, is that kid shooting practicing all the time?

00:13:51.355 --> 00:13:57.275
Because to me, that's what becomes the differentiator later on, right?

00:13:57.769 --> 00:14:05.037
All the guys I played with and women at a high level, we all had that in common, right?

00:14:05.037 --> 00:14:10.576
It was, oh no, after school I would just shoot and then I'd go to the ring and it was actually kinda cool to meet other people like that.

00:14:10.576 --> 00:14:15.313
Eventually, like when I was growing up, I was actually ostracized for that a bit, which I didn't care about.

00:14:15.313 --> 00:14:19.114
But you realize, oh, wow, everyone's working hard like this at the highest levels.

00:14:19.114 --> 00:14:25.216
So I wonder and you guys have been through it again, christy, your daughter played Division One.

00:14:25.216 --> 00:14:27.232
Mike, you see all this.

00:14:27.232 --> 00:14:37.500
I'm gonna pose this question how much of it, what percentage of it is the team and the competition versus the kid's personal drive?

00:14:37.500 --> 00:14:41.389
Because I'll say this too if you don't have that drive, you're already off the chart, right?

00:14:41.389 --> 00:14:42.716
You're just not gonna make it right.

00:14:42.716 --> 00:14:47.934
And when I say make it, I just meant to a high level, I'm not talking pro or anything 100%, it's the kid.

00:14:48.269 --> 00:14:50.798
We just did the interview with Cam Atkinson's parents.

00:14:50.798 --> 00:14:58.195
They had five boys, right All of them played hockey, but it was the one who had the drive and the passion and they took note.

00:14:58.195 --> 00:14:59.580
Boy, this kid's different.

00:14:59.580 --> 00:15:02.158
He really wants more okay, exactly words.

00:15:02.158 --> 00:15:08.317
Let's go ahead and invest a little bit more with him because he wants it.

00:15:08.317 --> 00:15:09.701
He's hungry for it.

00:15:09.701 --> 00:15:11.052
We're not driving it.

00:15:11.313 --> 00:15:30.971
He is yeah, it's definitely his, and that's a red flag if you have to drive your son or daughter an hour and a half to a place where they're motivated to play or you think you're motivated to play, and then it's probably your time to say let's see what happens if he's just sitting at home, like now.

00:15:31.072 --> 00:15:38.854
Again, there's another side of this, too, where I just think if you're around low performing people, you become a low performer.

00:15:38.854 --> 00:15:54.115
I just believe that it's very hard especially in our kids' era, where it's so easy to do other things digitally, and for us to make it easy for them to do things where they don't have to be active.

00:15:54.115 --> 00:15:55.740
It's really easy.

00:15:55.740 --> 00:16:08.955
I can see how easy it would be for a kid just to say I'd rather just stay home and do it, or just kind of hang out with my friends that aren't doing anything, because more and more society is not doing anything with their kids.

00:16:08.955 --> 00:16:11.557
So that's how I see it.

00:16:11.750 --> 00:16:25.157
So if you need to bring your kids somewhere where there's a whole bunch of other high performing kids well, we all think they're high performing kids because they're all passionate and they all kind of sharpen each other then okay, I'll make a pretty good argument.

00:16:25.157 --> 00:16:35.735
But if you're in a community that has six or seven or eight kids and you can then take those resources and say, well, I know the team like this dad, I know the team has 15 kids on it.

00:16:35.735 --> 00:16:36.779
They're not very good.

00:16:36.779 --> 00:16:38.014
The level's so much lower.

00:16:38.014 --> 00:16:44.096
But you're telling me that there aren't five kids on that team that want to get better, so drive those five kids.

00:16:44.551 --> 00:16:46.738
You know who more would go to five kids.

00:16:47.509 --> 00:16:51.413
He seems really happy with the coach's attitude and his knowledge of how to do it.

00:16:51.433 --> 00:16:53.546
The kid knows the coach, so be a confident in the coach.

00:16:53.546 --> 00:16:54.894
Yeah, he trains the coach already.

00:16:54.913 --> 00:16:59.395
He feels comfortable with the coach and if I'm that parent, I'd be like, listen, I really want to stay here.

00:16:59.395 --> 00:17:01.456
My kid loves you, my kid loves being here.

00:17:01.456 --> 00:17:03.937
How can I help get better kids here?

00:17:03.937 --> 00:17:04.913
Exactly, right.

00:17:04.913 --> 00:17:14.037
And then, how can I build people around my needs, because I think that other parents have the same needs as me, and you and all the parents out there listening.

00:17:14.809 --> 00:17:16.676
You know where all these people are traveling.

00:17:16.676 --> 00:17:17.833
There's no secret.

00:17:17.833 --> 00:17:21.557
Just go on Facebook and say, oh, so and so is here, so and so is there, so and so is there.

00:17:21.557 --> 00:17:24.789
And you see them all in church on Sundays, sitting there and sitting there, going.

00:17:24.789 --> 00:17:27.755
Well, how are you all going here, like we're all living here?

00:17:27.755 --> 00:17:45.125
So just look in your community and say how can I make my community the best community in my team and my level, instead of the easy out which is fill up the car and drive away, and I think that's you know again, not everybody can do that.

00:17:45.125 --> 00:18:00.048
Maybe not everybody has the resources for doing that, but if you care about your own sanity, try it, figure it out, look at it and say what can I do to make my community team better, as opposed to just, you know, packing up and buying it in person?

00:18:00.480 --> 00:18:02.186
Right, and also be careful.

00:18:02.186 --> 00:18:07.470
Let's say you're in that environment, you're of the mindset that this is better for my kid.

00:18:07.470 --> 00:18:16.721
He's going to be around a bunch of kids who motivate him or her and if they're playing up he's going to play up too Great.

00:18:16.721 --> 00:18:30.882
But if you have to take your kid kicking and screaming to this rig and these practices and they walk out of there with their head down, don't think that all of a sudden, magically, they're going to.

00:18:30.882 --> 00:18:36.489
Some sort of flame is going to be lit and they're just going to become this other hockey player.

00:18:36.489 --> 00:18:38.988
You got to watch your kid.

00:18:38.988 --> 00:18:49.645
You got to look for those signs and if you don't see them being inspired and getting passionate, being around these kids, that's not the right program for them.

00:18:49.645 --> 00:18:51.547
Nothing magic is going to happen.

00:18:51.547 --> 00:18:56.286
They're not going to magically rub off on your kid if they're not motivated themselves.

00:18:56.920 --> 00:19:04.448
The percentage of quitting and giving up is so much higher than the percentage of being lit and fired up and finding motivation.

00:19:04.448 --> 00:19:10.027
It's so hard for an individual to be inspired to be that individual.

00:19:10.027 --> 00:19:13.962
You would see the viral video going around, wayne Gresky with the whole.

00:19:13.962 --> 00:19:20.380
Moms would always ask me what would you recommend my kid do to find a way to get better?

00:19:20.380 --> 00:19:23.544
He goes I didn't work, I just played Like I loved playing.

00:19:23.544 --> 00:19:26.386
So I just wanted to play.

00:19:26.681 --> 00:19:32.428
And it's an overriding theme in every successful person they love what they're doing.

00:19:32.428 --> 00:19:36.508
We heard it from Mr Actonson you have to love what you're doing.

00:19:36.508 --> 00:19:49.480
And if you love getting in the car and flunking out of school and not eating properly and sucking down Chipotle every weekend because you're traveling all over the world and it works for you, great, you know what?

00:19:49.480 --> 00:19:50.438
If it works for you, it works for you.

00:19:50.438 --> 00:20:11.522
But the minute there's a chink in the eye, but the likelihood of falling off when we all invest, think about the investment you're making 10, 12, 13, 14 years, and then, at 13, 14 years old, your kid goes I hate, like I literally was able to drive, I would not drive, ok, so if you're not going to drive, why am I driving Like.

00:20:11.522 --> 00:20:12.527
So what do you want to do?

00:20:12.527 --> 00:20:14.307
What brings passion in your life?

00:20:14.307 --> 00:20:17.169
And if being local is passionate, great.

00:20:17.169 --> 00:20:26.984
I'd rather have a passionate kid that's playing at a low level than a dead-eyed kid playing on an elite team sitting on the bench like wait for this game to end.

00:20:27.640 --> 00:20:29.346
Right, I think that's perfect.

00:20:29.346 --> 00:20:32.503
Absolutely All right, we solved the problem.

00:20:33.981 --> 00:20:34.242
We did.

00:20:34.242 --> 00:20:35.709
There was one more quote I was going to share.

00:20:35.709 --> 00:20:36.248
We're like the.

00:20:36.308 --> 00:20:36.919
Gear Abbey.

00:20:36.919 --> 00:20:38.134
So Hockey I love.

00:20:38.820 --> 00:20:41.819
I love that we have reached that status in the podcast and broadcast.

00:20:41.819 --> 00:20:43.846
You know, Mike, you just remind me.

00:20:44.441 --> 00:20:44.721
The heart.

00:20:44.721 --> 00:20:52.909
The heart, though, chrissy, we haven't solved the problem, because 90% of the people will be like for that kid, yes, for that one kid I know on that team.

00:20:52.909 --> 00:20:55.334
Yeah, he, that dad should be doing that.

00:20:55.334 --> 00:20:56.299
That's not my kid, though.

00:20:56.299 --> 00:20:58.928
My kid is the one that is going to make it.

00:20:59.249 --> 00:21:02.374
And we all think that, Like everybody thinks their kid is the one that's going to make it.

00:21:02.923 --> 00:21:05.335
You know, mike, I'm not even focused on my kid making it.

00:21:05.335 --> 00:21:07.628
That's the thing is that I don't even focus on that.

00:21:07.628 --> 00:21:17.430
You know I was going to say, like Mark, the date we're recording this, on January 15th it was just a few days ago I got, I had the first conversation of the year of.

00:21:17.430 --> 00:21:23.000
Well, you know, this other organization says who'll make this team and he could be on this team and not that team, and it's.

00:21:23.000 --> 00:21:24.205
You know, lee, what do you think?

00:21:24.205 --> 00:21:30.769
And you know I get that all the time at this year, you know, parents start to say, well, where else can my kid go?

00:21:32.644 --> 00:21:33.808
And January, the tryout season.

00:21:33.980 --> 00:21:40.125
Yeah, and again, sometimes, sometimes it makes sense, sometimes it doesn't, and it always comes down to me as well when does your kid want to be?

00:21:40.125 --> 00:21:41.134
Where's your kid's friends Like?

00:21:41.134 --> 00:21:42.476
Again, I'm in the squirt world right now.

00:21:42.476 --> 00:21:44.660
You know what kind of coaching is there.

00:21:44.660 --> 00:21:45.411
Do you think he'll get better?

00:21:45.411 --> 00:21:46.059
Does he want to do this?

00:21:46.059 --> 00:21:46.782
Does she want to do this?

00:21:46.782 --> 00:21:49.904
You know you got to ask great questions if you want to get great answers.

00:21:49.904 --> 00:21:56.148
Mike, you reminded me a minute ago with that Wayne Greski coat that you know to keep it even more time and date.

00:21:57.119 --> 00:22:10.086
Conor McDavid's mother has that quote about Conor being very upset and not understanding why all his friends just wanted to play video games, when all he wanted to do was practice, and the quote is like she had to explain to him.

00:22:10.086 --> 00:22:15.989
Well, conor, you're a little bit different than other kids, right, I mean, they knew then that he was obsessed.

00:22:15.989 --> 00:22:17.982
And again, parents listening.

00:22:17.982 --> 00:22:20.449
There is a difference between obsession.

00:22:20.449 --> 00:22:26.324
There's a difference of obsession and being interested, right, and really loving, something like.

00:22:26.324 --> 00:22:27.567
There's levels to this right.

00:22:27.567 --> 00:22:31.430
And I'm going to say this you cannot put that in your kid.

00:22:31.430 --> 00:22:33.619
They have to develop it.

00:22:33.619 --> 00:22:36.665
And here's the other thing about it Some of them might develop it at nine.

00:22:36.665 --> 00:22:39.426
Some of them might develop it at 15.

00:22:39.426 --> 00:22:44.967
Right, you don't know, or some here's another one Some of them might have it at nine and not at 15.

00:22:44.967 --> 00:22:57.304
Right, ryan Whitney recently said and he's 100 percent right, he goes I know your nine year old is obsessed with hockey, but you know the nightlife and and and dating has not come into his life yet, or her life yet.

00:22:57.304 --> 00:23:10.247
You know you have to wait until after that happens, all right, after puberty happens, then you'll you'll have a better idea when some of these you know, quote, unquote, distractions, I mean I think I just call it life come into the play, then you'll know it's at eight.

00:23:10.247 --> 00:23:13.164
It's easy to be obsessed with something, right, you don't know the world yet.

00:23:13.164 --> 00:23:15.119
So I think that's important.

00:23:15.561 --> 00:23:23.779
The other thing too, with this specific situation is you know I said that the positive and negative you also can look at the opportunities, right?

00:23:23.779 --> 00:23:27.963
So he had said in the email well, we'll get a few hours back a week, we'll get more ice time.

00:23:27.963 --> 00:23:29.585
Christie, you alluded to that.

00:23:29.585 --> 00:23:31.366
I mean, that's pretty valuable stuff.

00:23:31.366 --> 00:23:34.009
All right, more ice time, all right.

00:23:34.201 --> 00:23:38.285
Also, if it's, if it's a team where you feel that your child is going to be one of the better players.

00:23:38.285 --> 00:23:45.339
Well, this is a massive opportunity to be a leader on that team and learn that side of the game, which is something that we don't do enough of, right?

00:23:45.339 --> 00:23:54.646
I think season A's are thrown around as bargaining chips nowadays and I've always said you don't need to see an A to be a leader, right, and Mike, to your point, right.

00:23:54.646 --> 00:24:01.115
If you're elevating the team and you have a drive and you know this coach, then you should be having that conversation of listen.

00:24:01.154 --> 00:24:03.913
I want to set a higher standard for this organization and this team.

00:24:03.913 --> 00:24:09.845
I want to be that guy, I want to be that kid, or I don't want that responsibility, I just want to skate and play.

00:24:09.845 --> 00:24:25.398
And again, these are questions you have to ask your kid, I think, as parents and coaches, sometimes as adults, I'll just say that it's very easy for us to walk into a situation and say, hey, look, this is what I think is best for you, right, all right, and I mean that's what parenting is Right.

00:24:26.301 --> 00:24:37.099
And the funny thing is is that the parents that feel they need to leave because their kids are you know, they're too good for that organization, are usually the parents that have the best following.

00:24:37.099 --> 00:24:37.863
Like people actually.

00:24:37.863 --> 00:24:39.327
Like it's so odd to me.

00:24:39.327 --> 00:24:48.759
It's so odd to me that a parent with a really good hockey player like parents, think that they're a really good hockey person, like, oh, let's take advice from that guy because his kid's a great player.

00:24:48.759 --> 00:24:51.936
That guy's a jackass, he just has kids just really good.

00:24:51.936 --> 00:24:56.220
Like he has nothing to do with his hockey knowledge or hers, it's just the kids really good.

00:24:56.220 --> 00:24:57.680
So you got to be careful.

00:24:57.680 --> 00:24:58.999
Don't follow that person all the time.

00:24:58.999 --> 00:25:20.083
But if you're the person that is being followed, you have a very, you know, strong possibility that you can waver people's decisions on coming and staying, and so if you're saying, listen, now we're all talking about going everywhere and we all see each other at all the other tryouts Again, if we just stayed together we're going to have a team here and.

00:25:20.443 --> 00:25:24.160
but it takes conversation and it takes a vision and it takes a planning.

00:25:24.160 --> 00:25:34.038
It takes, you know, somebody saying do you know what I could do with you If I had you for three years in a row, instead of six months cut, six months cut, six months cut or change, change, change.

00:25:34.038 --> 00:25:37.906
If you give me three years, imagine what you could do with that player in the game plan.

00:25:37.906 --> 00:25:40.299
You could give that organization for those players to be there.

00:25:40.821 --> 00:25:54.598
Like you know, I used to have a when I was coaching you, thaki, and the programs that I would have, we always had these almost like two year windows, like if you made the team, our obligation to you was you didn't get caught for two years.

00:25:54.598 --> 00:25:56.075
Like we're picking you now.

00:25:56.075 --> 00:25:58.857
You don't have to go look for a tryout somewhere Now.

00:25:58.857 --> 00:26:04.237
If you chose to because you think we stink and we don't know what we're doing, that's fine, but our obligation is to you.

00:26:04.237 --> 00:26:04.959
You're gonna be with us.

00:26:04.959 --> 00:26:12.704
I want you for 24 months, not six, and it's amazing what you can do with a player and how well you get to know what players can do.

00:26:12.704 --> 00:26:13.347
I mean Mike.

00:26:13.367 --> 00:26:17.355
I don't want to know yeah, especially if they all stay together and you see that chemistry.

00:26:17.355 --> 00:26:18.859
There's such a difference.

00:26:18.859 --> 00:26:28.037
You know right away when you're at a game and you're watching them play, if these kids have been together for a long time, you see it, they know each other.

00:26:28.037 --> 00:26:34.204
They don't even have to look at each other, they know it instantly where to pass that puck.

00:26:34.204 --> 00:26:37.538
It's so cool to watch, right?

00:26:37.578 --> 00:26:39.646
but this travel hockey world is ruined.

00:26:39.646 --> 00:26:40.288
It's ruined that.

00:26:40.911 --> 00:26:48.417
It's really like if USA hockey is gonna do two year of births 14 year, 12 year, 10 year then the obligation should be you make the 10 year team.

00:26:48.417 --> 00:26:50.396
That means you're on that team for two years.

00:26:50.396 --> 00:27:03.732
Like that's why I like to talk about you know, there are other conversations we have right but like that's why we talk about major minor hockey and making a team with year of birth so that you can stay with that team for two years and not have the pressure of getting a kid cut or not have the pressure.

00:27:03.732 --> 00:27:09.516
You gotta get rid of the dead wood and bring in a kid from an outside organization that somebody else developed, not you.

00:27:09.516 --> 00:27:11.958
Your job is to develop kids in your organization.

00:27:12.329 --> 00:27:17.674
So I just think there's so many different variables here that we could now.

00:27:17.674 --> 00:27:19.380
But let's go back.

00:27:19.380 --> 00:27:41.438
I guess the situation is my kid is traveling an hour and a half both ways and then you know it was funny our friends over at the hockey think tank there in Toford just came out with a little statistic from Sweden, right, that in a 16 minute practice kids were getting 12 minutes in the US of actual time like active time on ice 12 minutes.

00:27:41.438 --> 00:27:57.554
So imagine now, now add that to this guy's commute an hour and a half back, two, three hours, then he gets on the ice and he gets 12 minutes of ice, 12 minutes of, and I guarantee you, if I go on the live bar right now watch that practice, 12 minutes is probably.

00:27:57.755 --> 00:28:01.887
It's a gift, yeah you know, so I think it's like that's pretty shocking.

00:28:03.093 --> 00:28:03.936
Yeah it's true, though.

00:28:04.230 --> 00:28:08.276
It's just 12 minutes and a 60 minute practice of active hockey play.

00:28:08.276 --> 00:28:09.935
So imagine doing all of that.

00:28:09.935 --> 00:28:22.336
And then now now stay at your local organization, figure out a place to get 60 minutes of ice, and then multiply that by five days a week, and then multiply that by you know what you could do for your kid off the ice.

00:28:22.336 --> 00:28:26.036
All of a sudden now you got a real development path, but you know again people just do.

00:28:26.036 --> 00:28:29.579
We do everything counterintuitive to the actual fact of how to develop.

00:28:29.869 --> 00:28:33.112
Well, mike, here's another actionable item that I did one time.

00:28:33.112 --> 00:28:37.994
That was very sobering for me, all right, and I'll tell you the exact situation.

00:28:37.994 --> 00:28:52.555
I was driving to a job at the time from North of Jersey to Connecticut, so I was in the car a lot, a lot, and that's without traffic, right, and I remember that it was a really great opportunity and I am really glad that I did it.

00:28:52.555 --> 00:29:07.278
But what actually got me to think about switching was I calculated Christy this is gonna make you laugh the percentage of my week, month and year that I was spending in the car, right, and the number was shocking.

00:29:07.950 --> 00:29:08.336
What was it?

00:29:09.551 --> 00:29:10.496
Oh, it was like 18%.

00:29:10.496 --> 00:29:17.434
It was like I did it, like hours I have awake and how often I'm in the car, and it was just like you know what.

00:29:17.434 --> 00:29:19.919
I don't wanna do that anymore.

00:29:19.919 --> 00:29:23.615
Now again, it was a great opportunity, kind of equates to the situation.

00:29:23.615 --> 00:29:29.757
But when I felt like I got everything I needed out of that position, you know, I was able to move right to someplace else.

00:29:31.051 --> 00:29:37.473
But when you start realizing, hey, this is a majority of my time in the car, look, I did things in the car.

00:29:37.473 --> 00:29:42.176
I thought a lot in the car, but it's just like you know, wait, what could I do with that 18% of my time?

00:29:42.176 --> 00:29:44.694
I'm trying to say I started thinking about that.

00:29:44.694 --> 00:29:48.912
It was a lot of time in the car, all right.

00:29:48.912 --> 00:29:53.294
Again I would say this it jumped started my broadcasting career, so I don't regret doing it.

00:29:53.294 --> 00:30:03.396
But after a year or more of it I started to think about my life and I was in a relationship with a woman who would become my wife, you know, and how much time is it might not dedicate into that.

00:30:04.109 --> 00:30:05.315
I mean, that's a literal job.

00:30:05.315 --> 00:30:06.855
That's not 12 years of hockey.

00:30:07.731 --> 00:30:08.715
No, yeah, I was getting paid.

00:30:08.715 --> 00:30:09.438
That's a good point too.

00:30:09.438 --> 00:30:14.050
I was getting paid to be there, so, and that's, I wasn't oh, but it's a career path, like.

00:30:14.092 --> 00:30:27.298
It's like something you do Like listen you hear all the time, right guys that work in New York and they live in Ohio and they fly in and they save money on a hotel or whatever Like it's like people do what you have to do to make a living, but with 12 year old boys and girls.

00:30:28.874 --> 00:30:39.074
if it becomes I've got to do what I got to do to make a living, then you know, I don't know, I just it's hard for me to differentiate between these teams, and I've said this a number of times, even this past weekend.

00:30:39.074 --> 00:30:45.791
You know, give me these six or seven local teams that are all these great teams, but sticks in the middle of the ice, jumble it up.

00:30:45.791 --> 00:30:47.317
I'll re-sort the teams.

00:30:47.317 --> 00:30:48.393
They're all the same teams.

00:30:48.933 --> 00:30:49.856
They're all the same teams, yeah.

00:30:50.951 --> 00:30:53.757
And so so so they're just, it's just a matter of a kid here or there.

00:30:53.757 --> 00:30:57.435
You know, superstar here, superstar there, great goalie here, great goalie there.

00:30:57.435 --> 00:31:06.250
But at the end of the day, you know, out of a group of 15 kids on each team and you take six or seven teams, they're all the same kids, yeah well, that's a good thing, and we all know it too.

00:31:06.250 --> 00:31:07.153
The sad part is, we all know it.

00:31:07.750 --> 00:31:23.016
I'll say this to transition this too, is that you know, we just had a tier two player in this area make Quebec Peeweek Quebec right, and that shouldn't happen by the laws of tier one, tier two, aaa, right.

00:31:23.016 --> 00:31:33.999
It's just, you know, he was in the right place, he was shining on his team, he went to the tryout and he made it, which kind of just proves that, like he said, he plays for a tier two organization, right?

00:31:33.999 --> 00:31:39.896
And it didn't matter, he had the talent, he had the drive, he had the will to make it right.

00:31:39.896 --> 00:31:46.594
So you know, to your point, mike, what if several of those tier one kids felt that way and they were on this team?

00:31:46.594 --> 00:31:48.255
I mean, it'd be unstoppable.

00:31:48.255 --> 00:31:52.618
But I actually think he shined more because he's in this level, right?

00:31:52.769 --> 00:31:59.913
So again, parents, look, I understand the draw of AAA, aa, tier one, tier two, at least on this area.

00:31:59.913 --> 00:32:07.190
I know it's different in Minnesota and other places around the country who listen to this, but that cannot be the only decision maker, right?

00:32:07.190 --> 00:32:08.336
We've talked about this on other episodes.

00:32:08.336 --> 00:32:09.756
Well, my kid plays AAA like I.

00:32:09.756 --> 00:32:14.143
I right, my kid loves me Like you know what I mean.

00:32:14.143 --> 00:32:16.376
That's my gauge for success here, right?

00:32:16.376 --> 00:32:19.016
And again, to transition out of this.

00:32:19.016 --> 00:32:30.294
Mike, you were talking about organizations and how there's turnover, and Christy you did too about how you had different kids every year, you know and then the chemistry that develops when you have kids together for years.

00:32:30.474 --> 00:32:30.855
Oh yeah.

00:32:31.349 --> 00:32:46.857
Let me tell you, as a team builder right, as a team builder and I get a lot of work with teams now that we got a lot of new kids this year we got a lot of new kids this year and I end up I enjoy it, but I end up giving kind of the same foundational team building lessons a lot.

00:32:46.857 --> 00:32:49.016
Right, and don't get me wrong, they're very powerful.

00:32:49.016 --> 00:33:01.556
I take a lot of love in the work that I do, but I always say to these organizations you should see what I can do with a team that's been together for three years and these kids really know each other and they really believe in each other.

00:33:01.556 --> 00:33:13.393
That is a totally different set of lessons and it's a much higher level of cohesiveness than having to get a mold, a clay, together for the first time.

00:33:13.970 --> 00:33:26.318
I wanna say it again I love all of it, but it's like I do the initial lessons 80% of the time and the real powerful stuff comes when the team is already somewhat gelled right.

00:33:26.318 --> 00:33:27.936
So that's just something to think about.

00:33:27.936 --> 00:33:34.941
You play with the same kid, you play with the same line mate for two or three seasons and you get that chemistry.

00:33:34.941 --> 00:33:38.078
I don't even know how to explain that when you know where they are without looking.

00:33:38.078 --> 00:33:38.760
It's magical.

00:33:38.760 --> 00:33:40.484
Yeah, really that's the right word.

00:33:40.525 --> 00:34:00.025
It is magical, my son's Bantam team was like I guess those boys had been together for a couple years and we went to Lake Placid for a tournament and people had word had spread, you got to see these boys play and we had people from other teams come and watch the game because our boys were just phenomenal.

00:34:00.025 --> 00:34:05.363
They were just amazing because they'd been together since they were Pee Wee.

00:34:06.798 --> 00:34:15.945
Well, I forget what they call them now, yeah, but that chemistry was just something that a lot of people hadn't seen, because, yeah, and they cheered each other on.

00:34:15.945 --> 00:34:19.264
It was just such a great, magical experience.

00:34:19.264 --> 00:34:23.403
I'll always remember that team, and that was because they had been together for a few years.

00:34:23.403 --> 00:34:29.369
Nobody went looking for a better opportunity, because they knew what they had was really special.

00:34:29.389 --> 00:34:29.932
These were your family.

00:34:29.932 --> 00:34:31.800
This was your family, right yeah.

00:34:32.655 --> 00:34:35.905
And that's also why we're all envious of the Minnesota community model.

00:34:35.905 --> 00:34:41.240
Right, because it follows Finnish and Swedish hockey models, which is like the gold standard.

00:34:41.240 --> 00:34:44.161
And then you wonder why does everybody do that though?

00:34:44.161 --> 00:34:46.719
Oh my god, I wish you were Minnesota.

00:34:46.719 --> 00:34:47.744
Yeah, you can be.

00:34:47.744 --> 00:34:54.581
Like I'm in New York, there's more kids in the Bronx than the whole state of Minnesota, just in the Bronx.

00:34:54.581 --> 00:34:56.581
Again, I'm like well, why wouldn't you?

00:34:56.581 --> 00:35:06.041
If you really wanted to grow hockey and you really wanted to be great and you're in this community of there's 90 kids in your community, then make all those 90 kids better.

00:35:06.114 --> 00:35:17.885
I'm going through the same thing in the lacrosse program I'm involved in and run Like I was like, oh my god, if this kid's too good, we have six kids that are fractured to have to go to all these other travel level lacrosse.

00:35:17.885 --> 00:35:19.862
I'm like it's a field and a ball.

00:35:19.862 --> 00:35:21.762
I said what the hell are you talking about?

00:35:21.762 --> 00:35:25.081
Like, if you don't want to go anywhere, the same crappy kids live next door.

00:35:25.081 --> 00:35:27.041
Then the kids are traveling to New Jersey to play.

00:35:27.775 --> 00:35:28.599
What's the difference?

00:35:28.599 --> 00:35:33.907
Like just find a way to have fun, high performance practices.

00:35:33.907 --> 00:35:37.882
And when I say like I do a lot of work, like I say with the Junior Ranger kids.

00:35:37.882 --> 00:35:40.659
Right, these are not high performers, these are beginner hockey players.

00:35:40.659 --> 00:35:46.344
But we run high performance practices Like I challenge anybody in our listening audience.

00:35:46.344 --> 00:36:00.697
You take one of my Junior Ranger practices, my high performance practice, and put it with any team, any AAA team, up to the age of 18, it will be a competitive, fun, high performance environment for those kids.

00:36:00.697 --> 00:36:04.463
Does it look like that with these six and seven year old beginners?

00:36:04.463 --> 00:36:19.541
No, but it's still a high performance environment and it's fun, it's energized, it's developmentally age appropriate and I think that's where we can all do a better job as an organization.

00:36:19.541 --> 00:36:26.681
So if you're a parent that's traveling three hours a day to go find the Promise Land, I can tell you right now the Promise Land is right in your back door.

00:36:26.681 --> 00:36:27.838
You just have to look for it.

00:36:28.094 --> 00:36:29.117
Yeah, it's in Minnesota.

00:36:29.458 --> 00:36:31.806
Well said, well said, or move to Minnesota.

00:36:31.875 --> 00:36:32.699
Yeah, move to Minnesota.

00:36:34.179 --> 00:36:34.458
Look.

00:36:34.679 --> 00:36:41.260
I'll say this in closing there is a reason the Minnesota High School Championship sells out.

00:36:41.260 --> 00:36:45.304
Both of the championships sell out the Excel Energy Center yearly.

00:36:45.304 --> 00:36:48.143
20,000 people watching a high school game.

00:36:48.143 --> 00:37:05.684
You could not get that for the tier one AAA midget championship on your life and it's because these kids go to these schools, they grow up in these neighborhoods and then when you get to that championship now you're literally representing your town and you should see the hockey.

00:37:05.684 --> 00:37:10.766
Whether it's a AAA final or a AA final, 20,000 people pay for these tickets.

00:37:10.766 --> 00:37:12.338
The semifinals are sold out.

00:37:13.202 --> 00:37:16.059
It's something to see, all right listen and the real fact is too.

00:37:16.059 --> 00:37:24.864
As good as that is, as phenomenal as that is, how is it that every NHL team doesn't have six Minnesotans on it?

00:37:24.864 --> 00:37:26.637
So think about that.

00:37:26.637 --> 00:37:34.768
As good as crazy as that is, and as everyone plays hockey, then why isn't everyone on that?

00:37:34.768 --> 00:37:43.139
So there is obviously kids develop right and gifted players in any sport materialize from their communities.

00:37:43.139 --> 00:37:48.038
So just have fun with it, be passionate, be in a good place.

00:37:48.038 --> 00:37:52.983
That's going to foster your child's love for whatever sport they're in.

00:37:52.983 --> 00:37:54.677
And then all the other stuff.

00:37:54.677 --> 00:37:56.844
It just happens, it just does, it doesn't.

00:37:56.844 --> 00:38:07.403
There are circumstances where you've got to push and pry a little bit and guide, yes, but at the end of the day, the player drives.

00:38:07.403 --> 00:38:14.827
The passion of the player drives their development in any sport, at any time, and this has been forever true.

00:38:14.827 --> 00:38:15.835
We're just not figuring it out.

00:38:15.954 --> 00:38:20.362
But this next one comes from Bo Bo says this one's tough.

00:38:20.362 --> 00:38:29.018
We joined a 12-year-old team this season because the coach was known as Mr Discipline, but for some reason he does not enforce the rules that he sets this year.

00:38:29.018 --> 00:38:33.740
Examples are he says to wear specific clothes for warm-ups, but when kids don't, nothing happens to them.

00:38:33.740 --> 00:38:35.661
Hotel curfew is broken.

00:38:35.661 --> 00:38:42.501
One kid ended up in the emergency room because he was playing knee hockey two hours after curfew and had to get stitches and still played.

00:38:42.501 --> 00:38:50.463
The next day A kid punched the other team's player after a whistle and was suspended by the referee, but the coach told him that it was a reasonable penalty.

00:38:51.036 --> 00:38:53.737
It seems like other parents support the coach when it comes to fighting.

00:38:53.737 --> 00:39:01.780
When I try my best to teach my kid that he should never throw a punch, he knows pushing and shoving is OK and part of the game, but punching is too far.

00:39:01.780 --> 00:39:05.483
Am I wrong and that these things are not OK, or is the coach right?

00:39:05.483 --> 00:39:07.663
I do not come from any hockey background.

00:39:07.663 --> 00:39:12.563
I would love to hear a show discussing these things and what is OK or not OK for the coach to do.

00:39:12.563 --> 00:39:19.641
Personally, I feel like the coach is trying to make the players jerks because he thinks you have to be or you cannot win games.

00:39:19.641 --> 00:39:25.403
Very interesting letter and it's tough to discuss not knowing the coach.

00:39:25.403 --> 00:39:33.583
But if all of that stuff is happening and that coach is not keeping the players accountable, that is a problem that coaches incorrect.

00:39:34.777 --> 00:39:39.199
If we literally take this letter for its word, coach is listening.

00:39:39.199 --> 00:39:48.585
I will say this as a team builder the biggest threat to your team bond, your team cohesiveness and your team being a team is you.

00:39:48.585 --> 00:39:51.878
It's not the parents, it's not the kids, it's the coach.

00:39:51.878 --> 00:39:57.903
It is your responsibility to be the standard of excellence and accountability when it comes to running a hockey team.

00:39:57.903 --> 00:40:05.885
So if you set the rules and you allow the rules to be broken and or you break the rules, you are damning that team.

00:40:05.885 --> 00:40:14.460
You really are and that kid's going to end up driving an hour and a half to another rank to try and get on another team because of that accountability.

00:40:14.460 --> 00:40:30.465
To me, the life lessons are so much more valuable than the hockey lessons and if you are teaching these kids that it's OK to break the rules and it's OK to not be accountable, you are hurting them so much further, beyond hockey.

00:40:30.465 --> 00:40:37.583
So again, if this letter is to be taken literally, this is a scary situation.

00:40:38.751 --> 00:40:44.141
Yeah, I agree, a lot of red flags going up with this coach.

00:40:44.141 --> 00:40:48.019
I wonder if there's something else going on here.

00:40:48.019 --> 00:40:59.199
You know, I can't imagine an organization would allow that kind of a coach to continue being a coach, because this doesn't just suddenly happen.

00:40:59.199 --> 00:41:03.751
You must have some kind of a pattern, you know.

00:41:03.751 --> 00:41:07.257
I wonder if he knew, has he been moving around to other organizations?

00:41:07.257 --> 00:41:12.025
Because that's usually a sign of a problem coach when you see him hopping around.

00:41:12.025 --> 00:41:17.199
And then I guess I would go to my organization and discuss it with them.

00:41:17.199 --> 00:41:19.983
Hey, has that been complained about this coach?

00:41:19.983 --> 00:41:23.295
I'm concerned about some issues going on.

00:41:23.295 --> 00:41:35.289
I would hope you with the organization would listen and either have a talk with that coach, replace him, maybe put somebody else there for a while, maybe the coaches going through some issues, I don't know.

00:41:35.289 --> 00:41:38.329
I'd have to investigate that a little further.

00:41:39.231 --> 00:41:40.813
Yeah, I agree with that too, christy.

00:41:40.813 --> 00:41:44.360
And again, it's a little freaky, especially with the fighting.

00:41:44.360 --> 00:41:46.242
Keep on, this is 12 years old, right?

00:41:46.242 --> 00:41:47.224
We're talking Peewees here.

00:41:48.092 --> 00:41:49.990
That's ridiculous yeah you don't know.

00:41:50.050 --> 00:41:57.161
Listen, I think these are hard right, because you have to have a better perspective of what's going on.

00:41:57.161 --> 00:42:03.034
Number one is we've talked about this a million times on the podcast Did you have a parent meeting at the beginning of the year?

00:42:03.034 --> 00:42:04.737
Was there some standard set?

00:42:04.737 --> 00:42:06.579
Did you know ahead of time?

00:42:06.579 --> 00:42:14.797
The coach is like listen, we're going to be tough, we're going to let the kids go at it, and then if you're a bad dad that signed off on that, then hey, what deal with it?

00:42:14.797 --> 00:42:17.862
You've just signed off on the fact that that was a tough coach.

00:42:19.552 --> 00:42:20.157
Mr Discipline.

00:42:21.469 --> 00:42:42.226
Mr Discipline, and I think on the other side I tell the coaches I work with all the time, the more rules that you can enforce and don't have them Like coaching and managing kids and parents and families and people is, once you start boxing yourself in the corner, literally right.

00:42:42.226 --> 00:42:48.648
If you throw a punch on this team, you're off the team and the kid throws a punch and you're like okay listen, you can't do that.

00:42:48.827 --> 00:42:49.349
You can't do that.

00:42:50.614 --> 00:42:51.635
And it was your kid, right.

00:42:51.635 --> 00:43:06.501
And then you go now I'm really screwed, like, so it's like, or if you're going to be late, and then you're the coach that's always late, or if you, you know, if you're going to enforce like dress code and everybody's got to be in dress code, but then you know, five kids don't ever come in dress code, right, so then don't have those rules.

00:43:06.501 --> 00:43:08.309
I'd say this I bark at USA Hot Kills.

00:43:08.690 --> 00:43:10.632
Or enforce them, mike, you get it.

00:43:10.693 --> 00:43:13.717
Or enforce them, or actually have consequences and stick to it.

00:43:13.717 --> 00:43:20.186
If the league has a rule that coaches need to wear helmets on the ice, then wear the damn helmets on the ice or don't coach.

00:43:20.186 --> 00:43:24.617
I don't believe in helmets, okay, then don't coach, you know so.

00:43:24.617 --> 00:43:27.284
So I that's fine, but I think it's the same thing, your coaches.

00:43:27.284 --> 00:43:29.072
So the number one thing I would say is well, did you like?

00:43:29.072 --> 00:43:30.916
If I was having that conversation with the parent?

00:43:30.916 --> 00:43:33.601
First thing I would say well, when you signed up, did you know the coach?

00:43:33.601 --> 00:43:35.634
Yes, what was his reputation before?

00:43:35.634 --> 00:43:36.516
He's a disciplinarian.

00:43:36.876 --> 00:43:38.581
Well, did he allow fighting on his team last year.

00:43:38.581 --> 00:43:40.547
Oh yeah, those kids would go out in the locker room.

00:43:40.547 --> 00:43:41.349
I heard rumors.

00:43:41.349 --> 00:43:44.077
Okay, well then, you get what you get and you don't get upset.

00:43:44.137 --> 00:43:44.840
You just steal it.

00:43:45.429 --> 00:43:48.315
And and, but at the same time, you know you can.

00:43:48.315 --> 00:43:49.217
You can still.

00:43:49.217 --> 00:43:50.498
This is great.

00:43:50.498 --> 00:43:53.264
This is a great chance to talk to your own child.

00:43:53.264 --> 00:43:55.934
Like, listen, we don't do this Right.

00:43:55.934 --> 00:44:05.329
I find this acceptable Protect yourself, and if there's an issue, we're going to go see the coach together and be like listen, you know, but make sure your kids are the one setting the punches up.

00:44:05.329 --> 00:44:10.659
Like, make sure your kids are the one causing the issues, and some of us get blinded by that.

00:44:10.659 --> 00:44:14.244
Like, not my child, my, my son is an angel.

00:44:14.244 --> 00:44:17.190
You know, and I think you know he never, you know he swears no.

00:44:17.190 --> 00:44:19.034
Like I can't believe it.

00:44:19.034 --> 00:44:24.349
Like so I think it's just like, just understand, and I don't want to throw any coaches under the bus because I don't know this coach personally.

00:44:25.414 --> 00:44:26.117
And none of us do yeah.

00:44:27.030 --> 00:44:28.672
And just just take it for what it is.

00:44:28.672 --> 00:44:31.556
If you're a disciplinarian coach, be a disciplinarian, I have no problem with it.

00:44:31.556 --> 00:44:43.715
I mean, listen, if you sign up for a guy who is a hard ass or you know who wants to really give it, then then that's if your son or daughter can deal with that and take it and likes it even like listen.

00:44:43.715 --> 00:44:47.101
I had coaches like the coaches that I like.

00:44:47.101 --> 00:44:57.378
Growing up I could never imagine my kids playing for like they were nuts, like they, like they were really really tough, like, like, just like.

00:44:57.378 --> 00:44:58.219
Oh my God.

00:44:58.219 --> 00:45:08.286
And even me as a coach, like I could never have my 16 year old play for Mike Benelli, the coach of 16 year olds, back in the day.

00:45:08.771 --> 00:45:09.572
You know having kids.

00:45:09.572 --> 00:45:19.590
You know you're going to skate until somebody pukes out here, you know if you're, if you, if you have your tape on your shin pads wrong, get the hell off the ice and go home, you know.

00:45:19.590 --> 00:45:25.137
Or if you, you know if you're lace breaks, you know while you're tying it before a game, you're done, get out.

00:45:25.137 --> 00:45:25.998
You weren't prepared.

00:45:25.998 --> 00:45:27.121
You know these are kind of.

00:45:27.121 --> 00:45:29.764
You know these are things that I grew up thinking, but that's normal.

00:45:30.369 --> 00:45:31.030
You know you're not a real.

00:45:31.030 --> 00:45:35.278
You know that's a coach, that that has the, that has the room, but you know it.

00:45:35.278 --> 00:45:38.224
But again, now, if you sign up for that, then know it, be it.

00:45:38.224 --> 00:45:41.349
You know, just embrace it and say, hey, listen, got to be prepared.

00:45:41.349 --> 00:45:46.820
You forgot your jersey, you're not playing, we're not going to help you, we're not going to help you overcome that.

00:45:46.820 --> 00:45:50.532
We're going to say too bad, and now you move on.

00:45:50.532 --> 00:45:56.572
But you know, as far as the physical stuff goes and the technique, I hear that all the time like, oh, that coach is teaching that.

00:45:56.572 --> 00:45:57.554
I don't know.

00:45:57.554 --> 00:46:14.094
I like to see that If the coach is teaching a player how to stick, check somebody and punch them in the face without the ref seeing it, you know, then I'd probably, I would probably bring that up and be like listen, I just this is really hard for me to get behind, but research a little bit and kind of figure out.

00:46:14.094 --> 00:46:15.076
You know what is that line?

00:46:15.317 --> 00:46:16.498
and what would you?

00:46:16.498 --> 00:46:23.329
Would you go to the coach for those kinds of concerns if he's showing signs of, you know, just kind of going off the rails?

00:46:23.329 --> 00:46:25.092
I don't know, I would.

00:46:25.112 --> 00:46:28.956
I think I'd go to coach first and I'd go to the organization I don't know I would.

00:46:28.996 --> 00:46:38.327
I mean, I'd be like, listen, coach, I just want to understand what the philosophy is here, because I'm really I don't teach my child this and I just need to know where the expectations are here.

00:46:38.327 --> 00:46:44.940
And he said hey, Mike, you know what, you know what it's like to be a tough hockey player, you know how tough this sport is.

00:46:44.940 --> 00:46:49.735
We're trying to prepare these kids for battle and for I'm like, okay, well, that's not my understanding.

00:46:49.735 --> 00:46:56.349
Like I didn't, I didn't sign up for this, Like I didn't know this was part of the protocol, and then maybe it's a second, you know, then then it really does get elevated.

00:46:56.349 --> 00:47:03.963
I think it's you know, you never want the coach to find out in my world that you went to the board first.

00:47:03.963 --> 00:47:04.704
I agree with that.

00:47:04.704 --> 00:47:21.382
It's because, because, because the thing is, a lot of the board members most likely would agree with the coach, Like, like your, your, your inclination is always to support the person you hired than than than be the first inclination of throwing them under the bus.

00:47:22.550 --> 00:47:25.856
Let me dive in into you know, christy, you're bringing up a great point and sort of you, mike.

00:47:25.856 --> 00:47:26.398
Here's the other thing.

00:47:26.398 --> 00:47:27.760
I like some perspective on this.

00:47:27.760 --> 00:47:35.778
I've been in situations sometimes where parents are upset about something that I don't even realize.

00:47:35.778 --> 00:47:39.525
I don't even realize that they're upset, right, it wasn't obvious to me.

00:47:39.525 --> 00:47:44.317
And if they go and I've seen it they go to the organization and it kind of gets back to me.

00:47:44.317 --> 00:47:47.181
Sometimes I'm not so mad, but it's like I don't even know.

00:47:47.202 --> 00:47:54.748
That was a thing I wish and I remember thinking I wish someone would have told me that, that that was a concern of theirs, because at least I could have addressed it.

00:47:54.748 --> 00:47:55.349
I might not agree with it.

00:47:55.349 --> 00:47:58.016
I didn't agree with it, but I didn't know.

00:47:58.016 --> 00:48:01.342
Now, with that said, you're dealing with personalities here.

00:48:01.342 --> 00:48:04.309
I feel like I'm a pretty approachable person when it comes to things like that.

00:48:04.309 --> 00:48:13.344
You know, some coaches might tell you to f off and like don't tell me how to coach, but but if that happens, then then absolutely you have the choice to elevate it.

00:48:13.344 --> 00:48:31.675
But yeah, like nobody anywhere wants to feel like someone's gone behind their back and this is why I always talk about communication being the root of 10 problems, 10 out of 10 problems is that if you don't at least bring it up to the coach first, you know, depending on their response, they might not even know that you're upset about it.

00:48:31.675 --> 00:48:35.688
So, like 100%, yeah, yeah.

00:48:35.688 --> 00:48:38.777
Like I know exactly what you think in two, yeah, yeah, yeah.

00:48:40.505 --> 00:48:42.552
Coaches that you get.

00:48:42.552 --> 00:48:45.722
You get even next to them and, yeah, they blow up.

00:48:45.722 --> 00:48:46.485
What are you doing?

00:48:46.485 --> 00:48:49.217
This is, you're not even allowed to talk to me.

00:48:49.217 --> 00:48:50.824
I'd rather you be empowered.

00:48:51.307 --> 00:48:56.592
I'd rather you be empowered to be able to go to the board saying look, I did try and speak to the coach, but they're not speaking back.

00:48:56.592 --> 00:49:00.248
Like that's a much more reasonable place Then.

00:49:00.248 --> 00:49:02.438
Just do you see what this coach is doing.

00:49:02.458 --> 00:49:02.840
Go back.

00:49:02.840 --> 00:49:03.945
Go back to rule number one.

00:49:03.945 --> 00:49:09.338
No, the organization you're signing up for like it just this is something you could have nipped in the bud in April.

00:49:12.445 --> 00:49:21.204
I'll also say this that I have had parents I'm just this is a funny one, but you're not on the bench so you don't really hear what we're doing right?

00:49:21.204 --> 00:49:29.117
So because I've had parents come up to me and be like, well, no one's coached my kid tonight and I'm like I talked to your kid five times tonight about this exact thing that you're talking about.

00:49:29.117 --> 00:49:30.728
You know and it's like you know.

00:49:30.728 --> 00:49:37.893
So you just everyone's got to take a step back and remember like you're not seeing everything that happens all the time and it's like I'll play.

00:49:37.893 --> 00:49:39.925
I'll play extreme devil's advocate on this one.

00:49:39.925 --> 00:49:42.414
You know that kid gotten a fight right in a game.

00:49:42.414 --> 00:49:47.284
Maybe that kid did come back to the bench and the coach said that is absolutely unacceptable to be fighting like that.

00:49:47.284 --> 00:49:50.114
If you ever do that again, I will bench you.

00:49:50.114 --> 00:49:52.952
I mean, you know, we don't know if that happened.

00:49:53.153 --> 00:49:54.197
You don't know right.

00:49:54.806 --> 00:49:56.371
Parents, I promise you we are coached.

00:49:56.371 --> 00:49:59.751
Wow, I can't speak for every coach, the people on this show.

00:49:59.751 --> 00:50:00.715
We're coaching your kids.

00:50:00.715 --> 00:50:02.405
We're doing it like I know we're doing it.

00:50:02.666 --> 00:50:03.246
And there's always.

00:50:03.246 --> 00:50:04.871
There's always so much like we had.

00:50:04.871 --> 00:50:05.494
I had a kid.

00:50:05.494 --> 00:50:06.396
That was funny.

00:50:06.396 --> 00:50:10.130
So one of my first games a couple years ago, we had a new couple new players in a team.

00:50:10.130 --> 00:50:22.007
Like literally, this is like right after COVID, kids were picked, everyone's on and this, this one kids Playing for me and the ref gives them a, you know, gives them a penalty, and he and he gives him the bird right and the and the red and the ref sees it, I see it.

00:50:22.007 --> 00:50:24.213
I'm like, and the rest, like you got to control your kids.

00:50:24.213 --> 00:50:25.597
Like I don't even know who this kid is.

00:50:25.597 --> 00:50:28.568
Literally I didn't know he would.

00:50:28.568 --> 00:50:30.012
I had no idea he would do this.

00:50:30.012 --> 00:50:30.333
He's.

00:50:30.333 --> 00:50:31.916
He's been on my team for three days.

00:50:31.916 --> 00:50:34.074
Like I have no idea this is gonna happen.

00:50:34.074 --> 00:50:35.099
So what do I do?

00:50:35.099 --> 00:50:39.378
I suspend him for two games, like you know the referee, and suspend them and I'm asking the rep.

00:50:39.418 --> 00:50:40.905
I'm like, shouldn't you kick him out of the game for that?

00:50:40.905 --> 00:50:42.476
Well, that's your responsibility, coach.

00:50:42.476 --> 00:50:42.797
I go well.

00:50:44.048 --> 00:50:44.188
Here.

00:50:44.188 --> 00:50:46.777
You're the one that got flipped off, not me, like I.

00:50:46.777 --> 00:50:53.114
This is, this is unacceptable behavior.

00:50:53.114 --> 00:50:55.150
So this is a early season game.

00:50:55.150 --> 00:50:57.744
I have to lay, I have to set my standard.

00:50:57.744 --> 00:51:02.639
And the argument back to me from the parents and the kid was well, the ref didn't.

00:51:02.639 --> 00:51:04.304
The ref didn't do anything about that.

00:51:04.304 --> 00:51:07.885
I go, yeah, but that the ref standards and my standards don't have to be the same.

00:51:07.885 --> 00:51:11.393
My standard is for this team and you know that's unacceptable.

00:51:11.393 --> 00:51:12.135
Did it happen again?

00:51:12.135 --> 00:51:15.471
Never happened again and Never anybody in the team again.

00:51:15.471 --> 00:51:16.434
Yeah, and you know.

00:51:16.474 --> 00:51:20.353
And then the referee found later on, found out, that I had done this and they're like oh well, thanks for.

00:51:20.353 --> 00:51:22.025
I go, yeah, well, you got to do that too.

00:51:22.025 --> 00:51:24.985
I mean, you get, just don't make me the bad guy all the time.

00:51:24.985 --> 00:51:28.945
But you know it depends on what your obligation is and what you think you are as a coach.

00:51:28.945 --> 00:51:30.130
Are you a teacher?

00:51:30.130 --> 00:51:31.135
Are you a mentor?

00:51:31.135 --> 00:51:33.025
Are you developing these players long-term?

00:51:33.025 --> 00:51:39.476
Are you just a mercenary, oh Stad of your kids to win, you know, weekend tournament.

00:51:39.476 --> 00:51:53.059
You don't care what kind of person they are or what kind of person they become if you don't care about those things, which are a lot of us that don't right, like a lot of coaches that just don't care about who the player becomes, they just care how the player plays for them that year right.

00:51:53.260 --> 00:51:53.922
And that's fine.

00:51:53.922 --> 00:51:55.449
That's fine, it is what it is.

00:51:55.449 --> 00:51:56.233
You signed up for it.

00:51:56.233 --> 00:51:59.186
But to understand, like I don't know this coach, maybe he doesn't like.

00:51:59.186 --> 00:52:02.704
It's like, yeah, I don't know, get no fight, I don't care, I'm not gonna see you anyway after April and you're done.

00:52:02.704 --> 00:52:10.204
You know so it all it really just is, it depends on what team you're on and what your expectations you know for your coaches.

00:52:10.204 --> 00:52:11.630
It's tremendously tremendous.

00:52:12.545 --> 00:52:18.215
If they set up Rules in the beginning and they and they're not following through.

00:52:18.215 --> 00:52:19.318
That's a problem.

00:52:19.318 --> 00:52:22.956
I think you do need to address it and go to the coach first.

00:52:22.956 --> 00:52:24.349
Say how about me?

00:52:24.349 --> 00:52:29.264
Hey, when we had this parent meeting, you said you were gonna discipline kids of the sevens, and you're not.

00:52:29.264 --> 00:52:30.228
Why aren't you?

00:52:31.967 --> 00:52:34.659
Christie, they armed the parents with the ability to do that.

00:52:34.659 --> 00:52:35.844
If they make the rules, you're right.

00:52:35.844 --> 00:52:40.289
So if a coach sets the rules and the coach or something breaks the rules, they don't follow through night.

00:52:40.289 --> 00:52:41.858
The parents are armed with that.

00:52:41.858 --> 00:52:43.668
I'm just gonna yeah, well, here's the thing.

00:52:43.668 --> 00:52:51.295
That's also a great way to keep yourself accountable as a coach, right, you know you know, I think there's too much apprehension when it comes to I don't.

00:52:51.355 --> 00:52:52.416
I got to talk to the coach about this.

00:52:52.416 --> 00:52:55.009
Look Outside the ridiculous.

00:52:55.009 --> 00:52:58.945
I don't have any problems with a parent correctly coming up to me with a concern.

00:52:58.945 --> 00:53:00.376
In fact, I'd rather you do it.

00:53:00.376 --> 00:53:08.835
Most of the time I'm proactive in going to the parent if I have a concern about their kid, like, look, this is what I'm seeing and this is how I think I need to discipline yours, your son or daughter.

00:53:08.835 --> 00:53:10.855
Do you have any advice on that?

00:53:10.855 --> 00:53:12.224
I don't necessarily say is that okay?

00:53:12.224 --> 00:53:14.074
I said you have any advice on that night?

00:53:14.074 --> 00:53:14.592
You know what?

00:53:14.592 --> 00:53:17.440
Nine times at a ten, like, please discipline my kid, right.

00:53:17.440 --> 00:53:18.465
But if they know it's yeah.

00:53:18.465 --> 00:53:24.344
And the difference is this when they know it's happening, they turn to the other parents that go on a coach, talk to me about this.

00:53:24.344 --> 00:53:28.068
I'm so proud that he's disciplining my kid, but when you don't do it, I can't believe.

00:53:28.068 --> 00:53:28.751
The coach is sitting.

00:53:28.751 --> 00:53:29.914
My kid he's that, didn't.

00:53:29.914 --> 00:53:31.918
He's sitting my kid he's he don't know.

00:53:31.918 --> 00:53:33.489
Um, right again.

00:53:34.010 --> 00:53:36.869
One more thing I want to say, mr Discipline.

00:53:36.869 --> 00:53:41.115
I think we as a culture really need to redefine discipline.

00:53:41.115 --> 00:53:55.150
If you're, if you're, 40 and up, you grew up in an era where discipline is punishment and discipline is is knowing your role and shutting your mouth and doing this, and, as a team builder, there's someone who's really studied discipline.

00:53:55.150 --> 00:53:56.655
That is part of it.

00:53:56.655 --> 00:54:11.878
But discipline is also waking up on time and having good, healthy habits and making sure that you are disciplined in your training and in your schoolwork, and the discipline of being a great person, the discipline of being a hard worker.

00:54:11.878 --> 00:54:17.768
So when I hear, mr Discipline, that's what you better be instilling in the players, right?

00:54:17.768 --> 00:54:20.005
No, hey, listen, what if you got up 10 minutes early?

00:54:20.005 --> 00:54:24.277
What if you got up an hour earlier to practice and you make that habit a healthy habit?

00:54:24.277 --> 00:54:37.326
That is another definition of discipline that I think we need to share, because here's the truth high performer, successful people, all of them extremely disciplined people, right?

00:54:37.326 --> 00:54:53.190
So, again, I think that what you're dealing with in this letter if I had to guess, mike and christy, I think you got a really old school coach that really loved hockey in the 80s, in the 90s, when you know you could have a bench clearing brawl and then that's hockey and and that is not hockey anymore.

00:54:53.190 --> 00:54:56.971
Whether you like that or not, the game is no longer like that.

00:54:56.971 --> 00:55:04.038
The game is based on speed and skill and I'm hoping and praying to the hockey gods that hockey iq starts to come back into this at some point.

00:55:04.038 --> 00:55:06.291
But the game is no longer played that way.

00:55:06.291 --> 00:55:07.516
So you know.

00:55:07.896 --> 00:55:09.965
He wrote in there about the toughness of hockey.

00:55:09.965 --> 00:55:17.045
Well, the toughness of hockey is being able to get punched or get hit and know how to respond correctly.

00:55:17.045 --> 00:55:19.952
I'll never tell a player not to defend themselves.

00:55:19.952 --> 00:55:20.552
Don't get me wrong.

00:55:20.552 --> 00:55:24.190
Everybody listening I'm not saying you just take one, All right, but are you initiating that?

00:55:24.190 --> 00:55:25.132
Are you the problem?

00:55:25.132 --> 00:55:27.056
Are you the one who's being a problem on the ice?

00:55:27.056 --> 00:55:29.150
That's mr Discipline.

00:55:29.150 --> 00:55:32.253
To me, right is teaching those life, life skills.

00:55:32.253 --> 00:55:36.081
So again, it's so hard to to generalize her.

00:55:36.081 --> 00:55:36.885
We don't know this coach.

00:55:36.885 --> 00:55:39.431
We don't even know the person wrote the letter, to be honest with you.

00:55:39.431 --> 00:55:43.429
So that's our general response to these um before.

00:55:44.625 --> 00:55:45.688
Good discussions though.

00:55:46.409 --> 00:55:47.972
Yeah, that's good Um.

00:55:48.273 --> 00:55:48.815
I like this.

00:55:48.815 --> 00:55:50.277
I like to tackle these.

00:55:50.664 --> 00:55:51.668
I love tackling.

00:55:51.668 --> 00:55:56.708
We should actually also say here if you have a comment, if you have a thought, always send them to us.

00:55:56.708 --> 00:55:58.152
Team at our kids play hockey dot com.

00:55:58.152 --> 00:56:01.672
Or you can send us a voice message Uh at our kids play hockey.

00:56:01.672 --> 00:56:02.326
Uh.

00:56:02.326 --> 00:56:03.371
Facebook page or group.

00:56:03.371 --> 00:56:04.777
Or if you know us, you can email it to us.

00:56:04.838 --> 00:56:06.244
We love doing episodes like this.

00:56:06.244 --> 00:56:10.195
All right, guys, let's let's end the episode on a happy email, because we get a lot of those too.

00:56:10.195 --> 00:56:35.264
Uh, you know we don't read all of them, but we got this one recently and I wanted to share it with both of you, and this one's from Ivan, and he says my five, almost six year old just went from learn to play to our local rec team this last fall and, as a dad and adult league goalie god bless you for that I got the urge to get all my coaching stuff done, which, for those of you don't know, it's a lot of stuff All right, and it has been a pure joy working with these kids and the other coaches as we begin our youth hockey life.

00:56:35.264 --> 00:56:40.565
One of the other coaches turned to me onto your podcast and I have loved every single episode.

00:56:40.565 --> 00:56:45.396
Not only are the hockey points spot on, but so are the life lessons for us and the kids.

00:56:45.396 --> 00:56:46.137
Thank you again.

00:56:46.137 --> 00:56:50.980
Please keep up the great work and look looking forward to listening to many more of your podcast.

00:56:51.000 --> 00:56:51.842
That's from Ivan.

00:56:51.842 --> 00:56:53.007
That's a beautiful message, ivan.

00:56:53.007 --> 00:56:53.672
We appreciate it.

00:56:54.505 --> 00:56:57.034
Ivan, we appreciate you keeps us, inspired.

00:56:58.065 --> 00:57:13.936
Thank you right, and we appreciate the coaches that keep uh, uh, boarding these, these links to anybody they think would like them, need them on them, and I think it's uh, you know, it's great that you know, I know I just love that word of mouth, or hey, you should listen.

00:57:13.976 --> 00:57:18.416
These guys, uh, they're full of crap, or hey, I really liked what they had to say.

00:57:18.416 --> 00:57:34.405
You know, whatever that message is, I mean it's it's just, you know, talking hockey and having an opportunity to, um, you know, understand different perspectives Is, uh, it's great, because I think we all, three of them, three of us have been around so many different arenas and rinks and levels of hockey and how.

00:57:34.405 --> 00:57:40.588
You know great parents and crazy parents and we get, we, you know, me personally, I've been a crazy parent and a great parent.

00:57:40.588 --> 00:57:47.184
I think I've, I've, I've run the gamut of, uh, you know, my, my emotional roller coaster as a sport parent.

00:57:47.184 --> 00:57:48.288
So I think it's like you know.

00:57:48.288 --> 00:57:54.625
So I think it's great that other people are listening and chiming in and using uh, you know, using this platform as a, as a resource.

00:57:55.686 --> 00:57:56.007
Well.

00:57:56.007 --> 00:57:58.751
I say I too, have seen the good, the bad and the ugly.

00:57:58.751 --> 00:58:01.317
Fortunately, most of it has been good.

00:58:01.317 --> 00:58:03.059
I could say that honestly.

00:58:03.606 --> 00:58:04.268
Well, it's gonna be good.

00:58:04.268 --> 00:58:07.788
If you're around, christy, you just bring a smile, um, and I will.

00:58:07.788 --> 00:58:08.391
I will say a.

00:58:08.391 --> 00:58:09.585
Mike said it.

00:58:09.585 --> 00:58:14.867
A great way to support the show aside from your five star review, wherever you're listening Is to share an episode.

00:58:14.867 --> 00:58:18.331
If you listen to an episode of our show and you think that was really great, share it with a friend.

00:58:18.331 --> 00:58:24.545
That is one of the greatest ways Is to help us continue to grow and help us on our journey, as we have grown quite a bit over the last year.

00:58:24.545 --> 00:58:26.777
But, um, I think I'm gonna end this one there.

00:58:26.777 --> 00:58:31.012
Um, we I should also mention we just really appreciate all the supportive emails we get.

00:58:31.012 --> 00:58:35.795
We get a lot of them, people just thanking us or or saying that this episode really stood out to me.

00:58:35.795 --> 00:58:37.469
That's why we do it.

00:58:37.469 --> 00:58:38.474
It really is why we do.

00:58:38.474 --> 00:58:40.864
It's why we started the show and it's really wonderful to be in a place.

00:58:40.864 --> 00:58:42.512
We're uh, really weekly.

00:58:42.512 --> 00:58:45.405
We're getting these emails from people and fans around the world.

00:58:45.405 --> 00:58:48.112
Uh, our hockey family, friends around the world.

00:58:48.112 --> 00:58:50.117
That's why we said that from the very first episode.

00:58:50.117 --> 00:58:52.010
Um, but this has been great.

00:58:52.010 --> 00:58:54.559
So that's gonna do it for this episode.

00:58:54.780 --> 00:58:55.985
Another mailbag episode again.

00:58:55.985 --> 00:58:59.492
If you want to submit a question, comment, anything.

00:58:59.492 --> 00:59:01.478
Team at our kids play hockey calm.

00:59:01.478 --> 00:59:04.532
Uh, you can email audio, you can email words, whatever you want.

00:59:04.532 --> 00:59:06.657
We'll, uh, we'll get it on the air as soon as we can.

00:59:06.657 --> 00:59:10.804
But that's gonna do it for this episode of our kids play hockey, powered by n h l sensorina.

00:59:10.804 --> 00:59:14.257
Remember, you can see or listen to all of the episodes at our kids play hockey.

00:59:14.257 --> 00:59:15.925
Calm for mike benelli and christy cash.

00:59:15.925 --> 00:59:16.445
Anna burns.

00:59:16.445 --> 00:59:17.405
I'm leo lias.

00:59:17.405 --> 00:59:19.487
We'll see you on the next edition of our kids by hockey.

00:59:19.487 --> 00:59:20.367
Skate on everybody.

00:59:51.603 --> 00:59:51.684
So,