Stop Coaching the Ice: How to Manage a Youth Hockey Bench
Lee Elias and Mike Bonelli explain better youth hockey bench management, communication, practice planning, emotional control, and player development.
Key Takeaways
- Shouting constant play-by-play instructions from the bench is ineffective because youth hockey players cannot process complex tactical information while flying around the ice.
- Effective youth hockey bench management relies on keeping instructions simple and using quick code words like donuts or butter to communicate instantly.
- The real teaching and skill development happen during practices, preparation, video sessions, and locker room talks rather than during live game action.
- Coaches must control their own emotional state on the bench because negative reactions and anxiety quickly spread to the entire team.
- Good bench management includes maintaining fair ice time, organized line rotations, situational awareness, and utilizing assistant coaches effectively.
🏒 Are you coaching the players on your bench—or shouting instructions at the players already flying around the ice?
There’s a big difference.
In this episode of Our Kids Play Hockey, Lee Elias and Mike Bonelli tackle one of the most common habits they see in youth hockey: coaches trying to control every decision from the bench.
After more than 50 years of combined coaching experience, Lee and Mike admit they’ve both evolved. The younger versions of themselves yelled more, talked more, and believed they could influence every play as it happened.
Today, they see the bench very differently.
The game is where players apply what they’ve learned. The real teaching happens through practices, preparation, video, repetition, and conversations before and after the action.
🎧 In this episode:
🏒 Why shouting constant play-by-play instructions isn’t really coaching
🧠 Why players—especially younger players—struggle to process tactical information during a shift
📋 How to enter every game with just a few clear points of emphasis
🍩 Why simple code words like “donuts,” “butter,” and “go hunting” can communicate more than a long speech
📝 How Lee and Mike use notes, lineup sheets, and game observations to improve future practices
🔄 Why good bench management includes line rotation, fair ice time, substitutions, and situational awareness
👥 How head coaches can better utilize assistant coaches
⏱️ What to say between periods when you only have a few seconds
😤 Why a coach’s emotional state can quickly become the team’s emotional state
📣 Why parents coaching from the stands can make things harder—not easier
🎯 How the definition of success should change depending on the age and developmental level
❤️ Why youth hockey coaching ultimately includes teaching character, empathy, and life lessons
One of the biggest takeaways?
In-game bench management may be the least effective time to teach hockey.
Save the detailed teaching for practice. Save it for video. Save it for the locker room.
On the bench, manage the environment. Communicate simply. Keep players engaged. Control your emotions. Help them compete.
And then let them play.
For coaches trying to become more effective—and parents wondering what good bench coaching should actually look like—this is a conversation worth hearing.
📖 Want a written version you can reference anytime? Check out our companion blog: How to Coach a Youth Hockey Bench Without Overcoaching the Game
#OurKidsPlayHockey #YouthHockey #HockeyCoaching #YouthHockeyCoach #BenchManagement #HockeyDevelopment #HockeyParents #CoachDevelopment #HockeyPractice #PlayerDevelopment #PositiveCoaching
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Frequently Asked Questions
What is youth hockey bench management?
Youth hockey bench management is the art of controlling the game-day environment, handling line rotations and fair ice time, keeping players engaged, and communicating simply without overcoaching from the bench.
Why shouldn't youth hockey coaches yell instructions during the game?
Players, especially younger athletes, struggle to process tactical information while playing at high speeds, making constant play-by-play yelling ineffective and distracting.
How can hockey coaches communicate complex ideas quickly on the bench?
Coaches can use simple, memorable code words like 'donuts' or 'butter' to convey instant tactical reminders without delivering long, confusing speeches.
When is the best time to teach hockey skills to youth players?
Detailed teaching should be saved for practices, video reviews, and pre- or post-game locker room talks, allowing the game itself to be where players apply what they have learned.
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